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Under consideration - 8/1/2005 9:58:36 AM

Superman42280

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When a slave says she's "under consideration" what are the specifics of that?

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 10:15:22 AM

HalloweenWhite

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I believe basically that it means the Dom and sub feel they may be right for each other in a BDSM context. and that they have decided to demonstrate this by the sub. wearing a collar of consideration. This means that the sub cannot play with other Dommes/Doms. because he/she is considering belonging to the one who's collar of consideration he/she wears.

HalloweenWhite.

I think thats right lol. No doubt Ill get into trouble if it aint. :).

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 10:18:02 AM

perfection20005

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I think that just about says it all, except that they can play with others if the Dom says so. I believe its just a term that means something may turn out to be long term if all goes well. No collar has to be worn, thats a personal choice.

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 10:44:15 AM

EmeraldSlave2

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What they said. It means "Emotionally I consider myself loyal and wanting to be with this dom, but he hasn't decided whether he really wants me yet or not"

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 10:58:58 AM

TallDarkAndWitty

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I always thought it meant if you are looking, don't contact me.

Taggard

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 1:49:28 PM

gretchen

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quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

What they said. It means "Emotionally I consider myself loyal and wanting to be with this dom, but he hasn't decided whether he really wants me yet or not"

Ouch!!, but true.

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 3:33:38 PM

softandshy

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If you were to equate the progress of an D/s relationship to the progress of a vanilla relationship then "under consideration" is a bit like dating exclusively. "In training" would be engaged and "collared" would equate to marriage. At least that's how it was explained to me in my circumstance by the Mistress. i am currently "under consideration." Mistress Steel has a good article on the stages of collaring. i'll see if i can dig up a link.

Here it is Consideration Collar. Incidentally, her site, Steel Door is very informative and well worth a visit.

< Message edited by softandshy -- 8/1/2005 3:38:13 PM >

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 5:00:21 PM

ScooterTrash

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Pretty much in agreement with what has already been said...liken it to going steady in the nilla world. Of course by my own way of thinking it would be a sub and not a slave at that point, but that's another subject.

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 6:13:32 PM

MsIncognito

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I always figured it was the BDSM equivalent of going steady.

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 6:34:08 PM

MstrHellsFury

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it's like pulling the patels on a daisy...he wants me..he wants me not...if you get the right flower...that last one will be...he wants me...

Fury

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 6:41:45 PM

IronBear

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I dont use them as such. I only have two collers, however, My view of a consideration collar or its equivenent is it refers to a probationary period where both parties can get to know each other unbder "working" situations and then decide if they want to go further.

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RE: Under consideration - 8/1/2005 10:59:20 PM

Vixen81

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i think mostly its a load of online crap. think of it more like they are dating, but not quite "going steady" yet. shes not collared or owned, but she is submissive to him.

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RE: Under consideration - 8/2/2005 6:33:56 AM

MrThorns

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quote:

ORIGINAL: softandshy

Here it is Consideration Collar. Incidentally, her site, Steel Door is very informative and well worth a visit.

Mistress Steel, I believe, wrote the book "Extreme Space". It is in that book and on her website that you can find references to a "Collar of Consideration". Any other books that I have found referring to consideration usually refer back to Steel Door or Mistress Steel, so I really have no historical references that show a "Collar of Consideration" as being anything but Mistress Steel's creation.

I see a collar of consideration as saying, "I'm indecisive about what I want, but I expect your absolute loyalty, trust and devotion." I see this as being someone's way of trying to make a "velcro collar" perfectly acceptable.

~Thorns

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RE: Under consideration - 8/2/2005 7:38:12 AM

EmeraldSlave2

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MrThorns
I see a collar of consideration as saying, "I'm indecisive about what I want, but I expect your absolute loyalty, trust and devotion." I see this as being someone's way of trying to make a "velcro collar" perfectly acceptable.

~Thorns

Unfortunately so many subs (specially newbies) are just DYING to be wanted, dying to be desired, dying to have that "relationship" that they actually drool and shout out that they are "under consideration" by someone.

Course it's a great ego boost to the dom, having a few half dozen chicks just panting for it.

Now, to be fair, like the mentor thing, it certainly doesn't HAVE to be all about insecurities and unhealthy behavior. There ARE instances where this system works perfectly well, lets people get to know eachother without feeling pressured and enjoy it.

But I see this as the rare exception rather than the reality.

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RE: Under consideration - 8/3/2005 4:45:34 PM

ProScatman

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quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrThorns
I see a collar of consideration as saying, "I'm indecisive about what I want, but I expect your absolute loyalty, trust and devotion." I see this as being someone's way of trying to make a "velcro collar" perfectly acceptable.

~Thorns

quote:

Unfortunately so many subs (specially newbies) are just DYING to be wanted, dying to be desired, dying to have that "relationship" that they actually drool and shout out that they are "under consideration" by someone.

Course it's a great ego boost to the dom, having a few half dozen chicks just panting for it.

Now, to be fair, like the mentor thing, it certainly doesn't HAVE to be all about insecurities and unhealthy behavior. There ARE instances where this system works perfectly well, lets people get to know eachother without feeling pressured and enjoy it.

But I see this as the rare exception rather than the reality.

I don't know about all that drooling, but the way it was put to me--it is a trial period where the slave makes the fact known that she/he is under consideration for collaring by Mstrs/Mstr, and conditions are set. Prior to consideration; I assumed that all involved came to know one another enough to take this step!

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RE: Under consideration - 8/4/2005 3:24:32 AM

Focus50

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When a sub posts that she's "under consideration", my first thought is that she's probably a newbie who's come under the influence of some carrot dangling wanka enjoying the benefits of her inexperience....

I don't use such terms myself because I happen to think both Dom and sub are equally under the other's consideration in those early stages....

Focus50.

(in reply to Superman42280)

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RE: Under consideration - 8/4/2005 3:55:40 AM

lovingmaster45

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quote:

I always thought it meant if you are looking, don't contact me.

Taggard

Usually put there by women who just want to be left alone. Does it work? i would say it does in relation to dominants who have actually been in the lifestyle for awhile; but for the "wankers'? No. They don't read anyway; they just look at the pics and send cut and paste emails to anyone who catches their eye...notice I did not say their brain.

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RE: Under consideration - 8/4/2005 5:42:57 AM

nella

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To me it is a more honest word fot what go on in most relationships, during the period where both parties consider if they want to be whit one another. It is the same thing, the Dom or the sub or both is in the prosess of considering the other person in the party.

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RE: Under consideration - 8/4/2005 7:58:49 AM

domm4subf1970

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A possible match for the Dom/sub

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RE: Under consideration - 8/10/2005 5:03:52 AM

DomButNotForgotn

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I would go with the definition EmeraldSlave2 posted. I am reminded of a Dom that was in contact with a newbie sub I was seeing on a very casual basis. He was in Canada, and told her she was under his consideration.

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