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RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 9:45:35 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: candlemaker

How do you as a Dominant handle a recognised mistake, your own. Do you view that admitting to it to a submissive/slave or whomever makes you less dominant. We are all human and will make them. Thanks. Candlemaker

If a D type gave off the vibe that they are always right.... I would RUN not walk to the nearest exit.


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(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 10:16:14 AM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: candlemaker

How do you as a Dominant handle a recognised mistake, your own. Do you view that admitting to it to a submissive/slave or whomever makes you less dominant. We are all human and will make them. Thanks. Candlemaker


People make mistakes, it's part of being human. To be honest, if anything, I think being unable to admit to being wrong would make someone less dominant if anything. How come someone be responsible for someone else, if they cannot even be responsible and accountable for their own actions?

So yeah,  owning up is where it's at.


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I still hear you scream... in every breath, every single motion

(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 10:55:39 AM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: candlemaker

How do you as a Dominant handle a recognised mistake, your own. Do you view that admitting to it to a submissive/slave or whomever makes you less dominant. We are all human and will make them. Thanks. Candlemaker


Daddy makes mistakes.  he admits them, we move on.  same with me.  i admit my mistakes, apologise, we move on.

we're both human, and to me it makes him a finer man that he can admit being wrong.

kitten

(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 11:02:27 AM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RRafe
I admit them, try to atone-and focus on not repeating them.


100 lashes with a wet noodle....given to yourself?

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

I have an understanding with anyone that I have a relationship with... I won't have unrealistic expectations of perfection from them, and they won't have unrealistic expectations of perfection from me. 

John


omg, you make mistakes, John?    j/k...if i had been thinking i would have logged the date and time of the rare occurances i've seen you make a typo....



joking aside...if a Dominant can't admit he makes a mistake, not only will i show him the door, i will help him to the door with a boot in his ass...and i don't give a flying rat's ass how "unsubmissive" that is...if you're not human too, you don't get human treatment...


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(in reply to RRafe)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 12:33:06 PM   
MrSpectacular


Posts: 1153
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		Mistakes make us human - how we deal with them define us.



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(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 12:36:07 PM   
canupleaseme


Posts: 775
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline 		I always admit to mine.  

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Proud mistress

(in reply to MrSpectacular)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 12:40:14 PM   
Phoenixandnika


Posts: 748
Joined: 4/22/2005
From: Aberdeen Maryland
Status: offline 		Fast Reply:

If you learn from them they are not mistakes but lessons.
No one is perfect, nor would I want to be perfect. That would mean I had no more life lessons or adventures to take. How boring.
 
Blessed Be,
Nika

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"Life is neither a bed of roses nor a carpet of thorns, it's just what you make of it."



(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 1:10:46 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

He handles the fallout and doesn't repeat it. He takes responsibility for his actions, and that's sexy.


Ditto here.

While I don't actually need him to say "I blew it and I'm sorry", I can always tell when he sees and corrects an error and it makes me grateful.  Sometimes words just aren't necessary because we both already know.  Sometimes they are, and he discusses it with me.

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 1:14:29 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Why would acknowledging a mistake make you less of a Dominant? I don't worry about that crap.

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Boycott Whales!

(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 1:20:01 PM   
DarkDaddyZ


Posts: 805
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: candlemaker

How do you as a Dominant handle a recognised mistake, your own. Do you view that admitting to it to a submissive/slave or whomever makes you less dominant. We are all human and will make them. Thanks. Candlemaker

If you don't believe you'll make mistakes as a Dominant, you'll learn you do.  We've made mistakes all of our lives because we are human.  Learning from them and growing is the key.  Some doms may wear capes, but contrary to the fantasy, we don't have fixed wings. 

Best,
Z-

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"Flirting is part of the job description." DJ Jesus (Lucy Daughter Of The Devil)

Vanilla Official Music Page http://www.myspace.com/djzulu

(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 1:38:50 PM   
Kirata


Posts: 15477
Joined: 2/11/2006
From: USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: candlemaker
 
How do you as a Dominant handle a recognised mistake, your own. Do you view that admitting to it to a submissive/slave or whomever makes you less dominant. We are all human and will make them. Thanks.


The first thing I do is wonder whether or not she noticed it. It does not further the relationship for one partner to be confessing and apologizing for mistakes the other partner never even noticed or didn't consider mistakes. If it is clear that she did then I trying expressing the view that I may not always be right, but I'm never wrong. If she doesn't laugh, I figure I probably need to apologize. I may, however, choose not to do so if (and while) I feel manipulated in that direction by an unrelenting poutiness.

K.
 

< Message edited by Kirata -- 10/27/2007 1:51:16 PM >

(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 1:40:39 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: candlemaker

How do you as a Dominant handle a recognised mistake, your own. Do you view that admitting to it to a submissive/slave or whomever makes you less dominant. We are all human and will make them. Thanks. Candlemaker

Valyraen recognizes that it makes him human. He apologizes and does whatever is needed to make it right, be it some extra cuddle time, an apology, or the classic box of candy. If it's really bad, I get teasing privileges. 

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 2:06:33 PM   
LadyLegs


Posts: 176
Status: offline 		I'm not submissive, but I think the type of mistake and the amount of damage caused would affect whether it would chamge my opinion of someone. 

Big difference between "oops, I said something I didn't mean" and "oops I took your car, got drunk & smashed it into a telephone pole"

(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 7:28:19 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		Admit it, apologize and move on. We're human. If anyone thinks we're not, check us out the next time we're sitting on the toilet. We look just like every one else and sit with our pants around our ankles, too.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Mistakes - 10/27/2007 10:25:32 PM   
ResidentSadist


Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline 		Standing accountable for your mistakes is real manhood.  My mom was a professional artist and when talking about producing professional graphics for a living she said, “everyone makes mistakes, it’s the mark of a profession as to how well they fix them” …she was designing the Clorox label btw. 

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I give good thread.

(in reply to candlemaker)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Mistakes - 10/28/2007 6:41:07 AM   
MRandme


Posts: 661
Joined: 9/24/2007
Status: offline 		i cannot speak as a Domme, of course but as a mother and teacher. i have always apologized for mistakes i have made, to my students and my children. It teaches them how to accept responsibility and shows them the same respect they should show others. The important thing is that the apology should be as public or private as the screw up.

It is a matter of respect in every way -- self respect, respect for the person wronged and the respect of the person wronged for you.  i would have much more respect for someone who was willing to admit a mistake and atone for it.

g

_____________________________

And thus i conclude with a wish you go well,
Sweet be your dreams, may your happiness swell,
I'll leave you here, for my journey begins
i've gone to be with Him again...

(in reply to ResidentSadist)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Mistakes - 10/28/2007 6:48:25 AM   
TNstepsout


Posts: 1558
Joined: 8/3/2005
Status: offline 		I've had a lot of practice so I'm very good at it. It's one of my specialties.  *grins*

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Mistakes - 10/28/2007 7:43:48 AM   
MidMichCowboy


Posts: 665
Joined: 3/23/2007
Status: offline 		I went through a period where I thought I could do no wrong. I was so obnoxious, I couldn't stand me. Now, I prefer to admit my humanity and my faults. I think I'm a better person now. Of course, I still love to ravish a woman and use her to satisfy my dark side. Now, I just don't make any excuses for it, except that I want to do it.

_____________________________

I want to capture your mind, your spirit, your soul, your body, your devotion and your love. Then, will I give you my heart.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Mistakes - 10/28/2007 10:35:59 AM   
rmanrr


Posts: 358
Joined: 7/25/2006
Status: offline 		Greetings
Mistakes are a part of life. I never claimed to be a God...therefore I make mistakes. I own up to them, learn, and hopefully do better the next time. And speaking of God...even He made a few...heh heh.


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Be Well, Be Careful

Jarl Rmanrr

"the road untravelled is the loneliest." Me
Courage...the ability to overcome obstacles during the course.
"to be insane is to be original!"...Me

(in reply to MidMichCowboy)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Mistakes - 10/28/2007 8:19:26 PM   
gandalf0297


Posts: 148
Joined: 8/6/2006
Status: offline 		admit it,correct it and try not to make it again. we are all human and mistakes will be made. but hopefully not on a regular basis.
Grandalf

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"The best things cannot be said. The second best are misunderstood." (Joseph Campbell.)

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 40
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