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RE: ? - 10/29/2007 9:29:14 AM

velvetears

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quote:

ORIGINAL: silentfire

Why do we come back to this lifestyle after we have been hurt? Why can we not just walk away? I so hate myself for craving to serve so deeply....Why cant we stop ?

Hating yourself isn't the answer. Embrace who you are, love who you are and the energy you produce will not be negative, it will be positive and bring you positive people into your life.

You can't stop because deep down you really don't want to. You have control, you may want to think you don't because of the pain you are in right now. Give it time.

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Post #: 21

RE: ? - 10/29/2007 11:09:48 AM

Dnomyar

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Paper cuts! LaTigresse your lucky you can do you kink at work.

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Post #: 22

RE: ? - 10/29/2007 11:29:38 AM

LaTigresse

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Things that make me hot......

Tying women up.
Tormenting said women in various and sundry ways.
Withholding sexual orgasms from said women until they beg.......then make them beg some more.
Having women throw themselves at my feet.
........and many many other various activities.........

However, getting papercuts on my right index finger (or any other finger for that matter)........does not turn me on.

It MIGHT however, if followed by one and two on the above list.........make things much more interesting for the aforementioned woman/women.

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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Post #: 23

RE: ? - 10/29/2007 8:01:58 PM

TakenPet

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You are what you are, and walking away from it will never change that. If it something you truly can't handle then there would not question as to whether or not you need this or want this? You will inevitably crave what you want and desire what you need. You should never deny yourself what makes you happy and feel complete ulitmately. Even in "vanilla" life you get hurt, but you still do all the things that hurt you anyway. You have friends who betrayed you, you drive a car at risk of an accident. Its an inevitability in being alive. You need to decide how important this is to your life and move on from there.

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Post #: 24

RE: ? - 10/29/2007 8:08:47 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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As others have said, your mistake is in thinking that youre choice of lifestyle will somehow change your life and it's level of fulfillment. Keep running back and forth to the thing that LOOKS more secure and you'll never stop to REALLY be secure within yourself.

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Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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Post #: 25

RE: ? - 10/29/2007 8:11:05 PM

Lordandmaster

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People have given really great replies to this one.

Silentfire, don't give up hope. It will take a while, but if you're sincere, you'll find someone and someone will find you. It's already been said in this thread: living well is truly the best revenge.

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Post #: 26

RE: ? - 10/29/2007 8:18:30 PM

apiercedkitty

Posts: 569
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From: Michigan
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we do it for the same reasons we do anything else that doesn't turn out like we wanted - because we want to succeed.
Others have stated that it's not the lifestyle, etc and i have to agree. i will add that the best revenge for me when someone has chosen to treat me badly is to go on with the biggest smile i can possibly have... so they have that lil doubt about how much power they REALLY had over me.
It's ok to be sad and angry... cry... cry until you think you can't cry anymore... then cry some more... cry yourself to sleep... cry when you're sitting watching tv... just get it out of your system and move on...
Good luck!

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normal is a setting on a washing machine...

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Post #: 27

RE: ? - 10/29/2007 8:29:31 PM

bipolarber

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Ever watch the movie "Annie Hall"?

Great movie. It's Woody Allen at his best, before things got a liitle weird with him. But it's a movie about going through this great love affair with an amazing, fun woman... but it doesn't work out. He tries as hard as he can to recapture that feeling with others, but it's no good. In the end, he sums up his feelings about the experience in a simple voiceover, as he's walking into a huge crowd of people on the street.... (visually changing the observation from just him, to everyone...)

This guy walks into a shrink's office, and says, "Dr., it's my brother, you gotta help him! He thinks he's a chicken!"

"A chicken? That's terrible! Bring him in, I'm sure I can cure him!"

"I would," says the man, "but we need the eggs."

Love affairs are like that. They're crazy, they're irrational, but they give us what we need to nourish our souls.

Why do we keep coming back?

Because we need the eggs.

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Post #: 28

RE: ? - 10/29/2007 11:11:00 PM

MasterFireMaam

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You're asking the wrong questions. Answer these three instead:

1) Who are you?
2) What do you want?
3) What are you willing to pay to get it?

Answering numbers 2 and 3 will often lead to the answer of number 1.

This was wise advice shared with me by one of my gurus.

Master Fire

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The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
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Post #: 29

RE: ? - 10/30/2007 4:53:36 AM

Dnomyar

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MasterFireMaam I would put number 3 as "are you willing to work hard to get it".

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Post #: 30

RE: ? - 10/30/2007 8:59:43 AM

hardbodysub

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Why do we continue to eat food after we've had a bad reaction to something we've eaten?

The problem isn't the coming back, it's making sure you don't repeat the mistake of eating whatever made you sick.

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Post #: 31