ticketed (Full Version)

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pahunkboy -> ticketed (10/30/2007 2:26:46 PM)

   A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard.   Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.  The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup.  

   As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, finger printed, photographed, and placed in a holding cell.  After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.   He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the 'Choose Life' License plate holder, the 'Follow Me to Sunday School bumper  Sticker, And the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk, Naturally...I assumed you had stolen the car."




mya75 -> RE: ticketed (10/30/2007 2:28:15 PM)

LMFAO




SirNico -> RE: ticketed (10/30/2007 2:40:49 PM)

A cabbie picks up a Nun.
 
 She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome
 cab driver won't stop staring at her.
 
 She asks him why he is staring.
 
 He replies:

   'I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you.'
 
 She answers,


 'My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am
 and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and
 hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could
 say or ask that I would find offensive.'   
  'Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me.'
 
 She responds,
 'Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have
 to be single and #2, you must be Catholic.'
 
 The cab driver is very excited and says,
 'Yes, I'm single and Catholic!'
 
 'OK'  the nun says. 'Pull into the next alley.'
 
 The nun fulfills his fantasy, with a kiss that would
 make a hooker blush.
 
 But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.
 
 'My dear child,' says the nun, 'why are you crying?'
 
 'Forgive me but I've just sinned.  I lied and I must confess,
 I'm married and I'm Jewish.'
 
 The nun says, 'That's OK.

   I'm going to a Halloween party and my name is Kevin.'





slaverosebeauty -> RE: ticketed (10/30/2007 3:39:25 PM)

[sm=biggrin.gif]{mental note.. forward that to former co-workers who curse a blue streak and say they are christians}




Termyn8or -> RE: ticketed (10/30/2007 8:23:48 PM)

Bad bad bad.

T

LOL




Sirandlil1 -> RE: ticketed (10/30/2007 10:53:56 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: pahunkboy

   A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy boulevard.   Suddenly, the light turned yellow, just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.  The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup.  

  As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer. The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up. He took her to the police station where she was searched, finger printed, photographed, and placed in a holding cell.  After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.   He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the 'Choose Life' License plate holder, the 'Follow Me to Sunday School bumper  Sticker, And the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk, Naturally...I assumed you had stolen the car."



ROTFLMAO[:D]




VadFarkas -> RE: ticketed (10/31/2007 7:13:40 AM)

I love hearing the stories my cop friends tell....
especially after hearing the same account from my biker friends.




MistressDelilah1 -> RE: ticketed (11/1/2007 10:13:44 AM)

Hilarious LOL




Crush -> RE: ticketed (11/1/2007 11:30:15 AM)

So sad, so true...so sad so true!




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