Could be a wallflower also a femdom?

Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (Full Version)

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AlphaMaleMat -> Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/4/2005 2:15:46 AM)
Is it possible that even wallflowers (shy girls) are also be femdoms? I have a very strong fetish with nice ankles and couldn't resist watching girls feet. I figured out that the nicest women wear wooden clogs and "Birkenstocks" - I'm so in love with them that I like to kiss instantly their feet to show them my devotion. My former gilrfriends pretty much liked the idea of having a cute footboy giving them a footrub at least once a day and using lotion with the scent of roses. None of them were dominant and asked me for that - so was it more like dominating them from the bottom? But I feel so submissive (by heard amd mind) and I really wished them to tell me what to do... Finally they all thought I am too much devoted to them and left. Again they all liked to be pampered like princesses they are and some really got orgasms when I sucked their toes. My question is: Could a real femdom be found who is not into this "leather thing" more likely a wallflower and sneaking around in casual wear - and who belives that the proper position for boys is at their feet? I'm logged in as an alphamale, because I'm domination people at my business. Any ideas are welcome!

onceburned -> RE: Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/4/2005 3:31:16 AM)
Mat, I do think it is possible for women who seem quiet and shy in public to be very different in private. As a sub male, I behave differently in public than I do in private. On the other hand, I think self-confidence is very important in a dominant. So if their shyness is rooted in lack of confidence, they might not be good domme candidates. Edit: Oh, and welcome to Collarme! I am glad you asked what was on your mind. [:)]

LadyAngelika -> RE: Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/4/2005 5:10:55 AM)
quote: My question is: Could a real femdom be found who is not into this "leather thing" more likely a wallflower and sneaking around in casual wear - and who belives that the proper position for boys is at their feet? Most dominant women that I know are only into the leather thing when they go to fetish parties. For example, I myself wear business attire during the day, casual denim/cotton attire in the evenings and weekends and sports attire when I'm doing sports. Everything has it's place. For the record, when I'm in a relationship with someone, I won't usually change into Domme clothes for the intimate times, though now and then I will for fun. If I have someone as a play partner and we get together for fun kinky times, that's a different story. I'm not sure what you mean about whether or not a dominant woman can still be a wallflower. I don't think that all dominant women are necessarily extroverts. In fact, I know a few introverted ones. The thing is, you say that the reason things ended is because they thought you were too devoted to them, understand that it might not be because they weren't dominant enough, but perhaps as you wrote "so was it more like dominating them from the bottom?". I can tell you from experience that I have had some submissive men attempt to impose their submission on me and it's a huge turn off. You say that you like to worship their feet but perhaps there are other parts of them they'd like you to worship and or other ways you could show your devotion. If these women are somewhat naturally dominant but aren't comfortable with taking their power yet, there are non-aggressive ways for you to find out what it is that they would like from you. Hope this helps - LA

MstrssPassion -> RE: Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/4/2005 5:29:04 AM)
When I attend a 'vanilla social' function with large crowds my demeanor may lean toward shy. This has lessened over the years, but I still find it to be my best defense to acting out or behaving in a fashion that may not be appropriate to that particular setting. When I was younger, school years, I was especially shy, mainly because I was still trying to figure out why my perception on dating & such was so different than that of others around me. I was very much a wallflower. MstrssPassion

Oumae -> RE: Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/4/2005 8:23:19 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AlphaMaleMat My question is: Could a real femdom be found who is not into this "leather thing" more likely a wallflower and sneaking around in casual wear - and who belives that the proper position for boys is at their feet? I think Dommes come in all shapes and sizes with many different types of packaging. What might be "real" to you may not suit another. The idea of Dommes wearing leather, rubber etc all the time is a bit of a fantasy. If you are asking if maybe some of the ladies you see walking down the street are Dominant then yes, we can be found in places other than dungeons! Not all of us want men at are feet all the time tho', sometimes its nice to have them beside me. Oumae

CalliopePurple -> RE: Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/4/2005 2:01:28 PM)
Waves hand at mention of "introverted Dominant" Yep, that's me. I actually have social anxiety, so I freak out when around too many new people.

SadisticPrincess -> RE: Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/4/2005 3:16:53 PM)
There are times when I go into utter invisible mode at parties, and I am still a bulldozer at heart. :) For the record, I don't own ANY Birks, though I dress according to the occasion. When I was new in the scene, I didn't have much fetish clothing at all.

BrownCocoaBBW -> RE: Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/4/2005 8:23:53 PM)
I often appear in social situations to those who don't know me well as "shy and innocent". Actually what I am doing is taking in the surrounding and processing it. As a psychologist, it is like second nature to watch people. In private and with those who know me well, see my dominant nature. I think at work, people would not be suprised about my lifestyle because I am very confident. Like the old adage says - Never judge a book by its cover!

fastlane -> RE: Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/4/2005 9:40:54 PM)
Most shy people in public...are tigers or tigeresses in the bedroom. To answer your question....certainly! Hell, I can't look a woman in the eyes in public, but let me get them behind clothes doors and ...well, I don't look them in the eye there either,,,,but only because they're blindfolded! I'm a Tiger..Grrrrrrrrrreeeaaattt!

GoddessDustyGold -> RE: Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/5/2005 12:03:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AlphaMaleMat I'm logged in as an alphamale, because I'm domination people at my business. Any ideas are welcome! You are also logged in as AlphaMaleMat because you are on this site as a male dominant. At least that is what your profile says. Are you dominant or submissive? You, like many others, are confusing the idea of a female dominant with the Triple X rated Dominatrix wielding the whip in a bad movie. We are not like that. We are regular people. What I wear, or how I conduct Myself in public does not take away from My Dominance. I do not have one single FemDom friend who dresses in leather every day. That is reserved for special events or some fun role play. And, at times, for the Professional session. And we sit around and talk and laugh, and even play cards. And we do all this in jeans and a tank top while the boys are fetching us a drink, or preparing some food. Why do you feel that being the life of the party, or the clothing makes a woman dominant or submissive? I am not a wallflower, but there are times when I like to be quiet and observe. It doesn't change who I am.

BeachMystress -> RE: Could be a wallflower also a femdom? (8/7/2005 3:35:11 AM)
quote: You, like many others, are confusing the idea of a female dominant with the Triple X rated Dominatrix wielding the whip in a bad movie. We are not like that. We are regular people BINGO! I am so tired of male subs with their fantasy idea of what a Domme should act like! (I must say it was a good way of weeding out inferior experience in a sub who otherwise talked a good game. As soon as they asked about my fetishwear or what I wanted to do to them.. gone.) I am a woman. I have good moods and bad. I am sometimes gregarious but most often reserved. I'm a card carrying introvert who isn't fond of people as a race and would almost always prefer a small gathering to a large party. Crowds make me tired, like they do any introvert. Do I dominate my husband? Yes.. where ever we are. Do I ever wear leather? Sure.. in the form of shoe leather (actually, the only time I've worn my leather shoes in the last two years was at my wedding and at my first meeting with my hubby. (a party)). I own all of three pieces of fetish garb and wear them less than once every three months. I look, act and dress more like a librarian than a Dominatrix. Is there any doubt in either my husband's or my mind who is in charge? Nope. My word is law. What a woman wears and how she socializes has nothing do with if she is a Domme. I'm seeing more and more of the club goers in leather and corsets who would faint if asked to actually swing the toy flogger they're carrying. Nothing external makes someone a Dominant. It comes from inside. It doesn't always show on the outside. Sometimes, the only clue a woman is Domme is self assurance. She knows who she is and has nothing to prove to you or anyone.

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