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Celeste43 -> RE: How do I know if I'd make a good sub (11/8/2007 6:38:39 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: rubberpet
What is the difference between having the traits of a good sub and what constitutes a good sub? It is the same exact thing. You can't be who you are without traits. Selflessness, obedience, and showing respect to your dominant are some of the traits that make up a good sub. I just didn't realize that acknowledging positive characteristics like selflessness, obedience, and respect to your dominant would start such a negative uproar.
What we had here was a failure to communicate. Syntax - the number one killer of positive communication.
You're still insisting that these are universal traits that every sub should possess. They aren't. They are the traits that you need to possess to be a good fit with your mistress.
Forgetting about the gender differences for a moment, the traits you possess would make you a bad sub for The Man, just as the traits I possess would make me a bad sub for your mistress.
Saying these traits are universally valued is wrong. It would be just as wrong to say that all good subs are pain sluts because that assumes all tops are sadists.
If I extrapolated from my relationship, I could claim that all good subs must be bondage bunnies, because that's our major kink. But obviously that isn't true.
Saying these are the traits that make you a good sub to your mistress is one thing, announcing that everyone else must be exactly like you is something else.
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