RE: How do you cope with Frenzy (Full Version)

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AnimusRex -> RE: How do you cope with Frenzy (11/11/2007 4:59:21 PM)

Fast reply to no one in particular-
I have read a few of the posts that seem to take issue with the words "sub frenzy"- and I understand how the phrase has a certain unpleasant air about it- sort of a dismissive tone, trivializing it almost.."oh, its just sub frenzy"

I responded, because I know it is a real phenomenon, I have seen it; I have also seen its corrolary, the Dom frenzy, and felt it Myself.
Maybe it is because the relationships we crave are not available in shades of gray, are they? There isn't really any such thing as "Sorta kinda being a slave" , or "50% Master"

What we want, is that intense communion between need and fulfillment, where our deepest soul is touched and fed. Just as many girls have felt lost and bereft without a Master, so often Men feel that deep primal drive to conquer and own- its not the need for sex, since that can be had easily at any bar. Its the furious aching desire to own a girl, to have her soul bared and exposed and held in your hand- sex is often just the vehicle for how we Men act out the hunger.

As much as we talk about going slow, and getting to know people- all good ideas to be sure...but often there is no halfway between the initial attraction and the plunge, anymore than there is a halfway  between standing on the cliff and diving into thin air. And yes, all too often we risk crippling pain...the price we pay I suppose, when looking for the intensity we crave.



lockmeupplease -> RE: How do you cope with Frenzy (11/12/2007 7:57:13 PM)

Thanks for posting the link to the article.  I can totally relate!!! My "frenzies" would include periods where I suddenly became obsessed with self-bondage, would buy more "toys" and would ramp up the urgency of my search for a mistress.  I learned a lot about myself but also made some decisions without really thinking them out (though I never regret having more toys [:)])



laurell3 -> RE: How do you cope with Frenzy (11/12/2007 8:42:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci

Ok, I took a minute to read the link.  Just to clarify, here's her quote:
"Submissive Frenzies are a state or condition that many if not all submissives will experience at one time or another."

I'm not familiar with any of her writings but I find some of her generalizations a little patronizing.  Here's a sampling of some of the comments she makes about a sub in "frenzy" state:

1.  "It can leave them irrational, willing to make poor decisions, rash, impulsive and generally stupid. A submissive in a frenzied state is at their most vulnerable to succumbing to the ploys of those less than admirable."

2.  "Contact with a Dominant, almost any kind will tend to rivet their attention. The very first gift that the submissive gives away here is their common sense."

3.  "A submissive in a pre-frenzy need state will often become very alluring, flattering, flexible. They will mirror the apparent 'needs' of the Dominant they are talking to in order to appear to be the perfect candidate for a future alliance. Though the submissives in general do not tend to lie here, many only present partial truth's."

4.  "It is very important for the Dominant to learn to recognize the symptoms of frenzy and allow for the premise that the submissive's judgment may be impaired when speaking with them. "

Wow.  Now I know there are folks the world over (vanilla and otherwise) who do/become all these things and then some when desperate to find a partner.  But to say that submissives as a whole ("many if not all") act like this is insulting to say the least.  Irrational, impulsive, generally stupid, lacking common sense, a partial-truth telling flatterer with impaired judgment?  Ouch.  All that just to get our dom?  Never happened to THIS sub at any point in time.  Not sure it does with "many if not all."   Some yes, because there are some desperate, unstable folks out there who will do whatever it takes.  Not sure they have to be of the submissive nature and they definitely don't have to be into BDSM.  I think the article evidences alot of condescension toward the "sub" type (poor gullible, desperate, stupid creatures that we are)[&o]................luci




heh this pretty much describes anyone male or female that's horney, doesn't it??????????  (it's a joke people)  My point is, I think it applies to both roles and vanilla alike at times.



TemptingNviceSub -> RE: How do you cope with Frenzy (11/12/2007 9:29:51 PM)

Personally, when I once had frenzy mode..I forced myself to do the opposite of what I wanted...I slowed down,I refused to allow my out of control emotion rule me...and when that did not work..I would read an erotic bodice ripping romance,and masturbate my brains out..[8D]....Tempting



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