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the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 10:19:58 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
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Ok, today shopping I get too warm so I tied my jacket around my waist. Not a big deal in the store itself but once I'm walking outside the things in the pockets of my jackets start swinging like crazy. Doesn't matter, I have a very female body so my hips they back and forth.

This made me remember something that Fox said to me once about the joys of walking behind me carry whatever.

He, of course, said he felt it emphasized his service but then he got a twinkle in his eye and added "Plus I get you watch your butt which is very, very nice."

For some that might seem like him objectifying me but frankly it made me blush a bit and really pleased me.

Now I'm not saying anyone who isn't in a relationship all ready or for some time should just state those things but this is one woman who does appreciate that she can physically still turn her slave on even when she is not trying.

What do others think about this scenario? Have you had similar experiences that might seem "unDS" to an outsider but which honestly pleased you both?

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

Post #: 1

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 10:31:57 AM

aidan

Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline

Hmmm, to me it doesn't seem "unD/s" at all, to find your partner physically attractive. And it sounds weird to me that somebody would take that objectification. When did it become uncouth to be attracted to the person you're in a relationship with? If sexuality (not necessarily sex) is a part of the dynamic, why would that be a problem?

All the women I've submitted to I've found attractive. Never thought anything of it.

_____________________________

Do what now?

"I aim to misbehave."
-Mal Reynolds

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 2

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 10:37:49 AM

MsIncontrol

Posts: 261
Joined: 10/3/2007
Status: offline

I expect my submissive to be very attracted to be physically and to check me out on occassion...I love it.

The post title reminded me of our wedding day. Robert is used to walking slightly behind me. On our wedding day our photographer kept trying to get him to walk next to me..and he couldn't do it. It was really funny..the photographer was going crazy. One of my favorite pictures is that of us walking back down the isle as husband an WIFE with him slightly behind me...gazing adoringly at me.

On the other hand..one thing I do enjoy which others may view is very un-D/s like is I like to look UP to him on occasion. He is 6'4" and I am 5'0". I love our height difference...when he is on his knees we are often eye to eye...but I like to have him all tied up on a cross or some other precarious position and look up at him. The fact that he is soo much bigger and stronger than me...but that I can control him physically and emotionally is a huge charge for me.

_____________________________

Happiness is only real when shared. - Christopher McCandless

(in reply to aidan)

Post #: 3

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 10:40:28 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: aidan

Hmmm, to me it doesn't seem "unD/s" at all, to find your partner physically attractive. And it sounds weird to me that somebody would take that objectification. When did it become uncouth to be attracted to the person you're in a relationship with? If sexuality (not necessarily sex) is a part of the dynamic, why would that be a problem?

All the women I've submitted to I've found attractive. Never thought anything of it.

That's exactly how I feel, sorry if I didn't word it best.

But I have heard and read women (and a few men too) who say that any statement of how attractive another person is is the same as objectifying. So if someone extends that into the femdom dynamic they might see what Fox did as objectifying too.

I'm just wondering if others have similar experiences.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to aidan)

Post #: 4

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 10:47:31 AM

DiurnalVampire

Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

My Fox has said the same sort f thigns. As has Angel. It is a perk of the position to have to walk behind a mistress with a very nice behind to follow (to paraphrase a former pet).
It isnt exactly objectifying. Looking at you strictly sexually, yeah, that would be. But I doubt that thought has ever crossed either or your minds, that it is strictly sexual. Admiring is not objectifying.

And yes, there are a few things that my Fox and I do that are supremely non-Ds but we enjoy greatly. We shower together, and I wash him the same as he washes me. I love it.
I hav run a bath for HIM, not for me, and sat with him while he was in it. It was wonderful, very relaxing, but not teribly D/s of us. It made me happy, so that was what mattered.
I cooked breakfast this morning, even though he will either do or help with the dishes together.

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 5

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 11:05:43 AM

stockingluvr54

Posts: 673
Joined: 6/22/2006
Status: offline

From a male pov.... Nothing like following the female footsteps!!

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 6

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 11:17:36 AM

rubberpet

Posts: 1743
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: The Land of Voodoo
Status: offline

Amen, brother! I love the idea of walking behind Mistress. The vision of Her hips swaying back and forth and watching Her tushy in tight jeans is something I can't wait to see. I don't think it's wrong to find Her sexy and desirable. I may be Her slave, but I'm still a man...I can't help the feeling of wanting to rip Her clothes off or hiking Her skirt up and burying my face in Her luscious ass! It's Her fault for being so beautiful and sexy!

But I could never have those visions or feelings if I didn't love Her with all my heart.

_____________________________

Collared and devoted property of Mistress Lorelei (vampchick88) as of 3/26/08.

Rubberpet - The Resident Anti-Subby and mysterious shadowy figure known as Voodoo, proud hitman and wiseguy for the Subby Mafia.

(in reply to stockingluvr54)

Post #: 7

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 12:40:13 PM

RosaB

Posts: 852
Joined: 1/10/2005
Status: offline

Nice topic, reading the responses gave me a warm fuzzy feeling inside. Not something I get often around these parts.

Its also a bit of an eye opener, I hadn't thought of the benefits to the submissive/slave. What naughty, naughty men. Not having eyes behind my head, for some reason, I envisioned you fellows following behind ( no pun intended,) with your heads (again no pun ahggg, you get the drift) slightlly tilted down. All this time the eyes were on my arse. I should have known better.

Thanks for sharing though, it may come in handy in the future when I'm in a rather sadistic mood.

< Message edited by RosaB -- 11/10/2007 12:41:08 PM >

(in reply to rubberpet)

Post #: 8

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 1:07:06 PM

Decimus

Posts: 174
Joined: 9/17/2007
Status: offline

It is indeed one of the perks of being a submissive!

_____________________________

Here is my story that some people have asked for, www.beginningofdreams.com

(in reply to RosaB)

Post #: 9

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 1:15:29 PM

rubberpet

Posts: 1743
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: The Land of Voodoo
Status: offline

This may not be very subby-like to say, but if Mistress has an ass I just want to leave bite marks on, it just screams for acknowledgement!!! The wiggle of Her hips and swaying of Her ass is simply hypnotizing

_____________________________

Collared and devoted property of Mistress Lorelei (vampchick88) as of 3/26/08.

Rubberpet - The Resident Anti-Subby and mysterious shadowy figure known as Voodoo, proud hitman and wiseguy for the Subby Mafia.

(in reply to Decimus)

Post #: 10

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 2:23:34 PM

pixelslave

Posts: 1444
Joined: 8/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

quote:

ORIGINAL: aidan

Hmmm, to me it doesn't seem "unD/s" at all, to find your partner physically attractive. And it sounds weird to me that somebody would take that objectification. When did it become uncouth to be attracted to the person you're in a relationship with? If sexuality (not necessarily sex) is a part of the dynamic, why would that be a problem?

All the women I've submitted to I've found attractive. Never thought anything of it.

That's exactly how I feel, sorry if I didn't word it best.

But I have heard and read women (and a few men too) who say that any statement of how attractive another person is is the same as objectifying. So if someone extends that into the femdom dynamic they might see what Fox did as objectifying too.

I'm just wondering if others have similar experiences.

Hmmm... if a sub sees his Mistress as being akin to a Godess to worship and serve, I don't see how telling her how beautiful or sexy she is, is at all inconsistent with his D/s dynamic with her. More specifically, regardless of the dynamic, I've never met a woman, Domme or not, who didn't like to be genuinely complimented and have her ego boosted in some way or another by the man in her life.

- pixel

Collared to Majik

_____________________________

Chivalry isn't dead! It's for those who have it in their hearts & are willing to be taught. It's a way of life, a code of honor; this one's armor still needs some polishing!

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 11

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 3:58:07 PM

Saint

Posts: 279
Status: offline

Walking behind someone has always been a natural thing for me. Even more so if it someone absolutely adored in my life. I dont consider that objectifying whatsoever, merely the natural order of things.

_____________________________

"Anonymity is synonymous with longevity."
Faethor Ferenczy

"I wish I had an angel
For one moment of love
I wish I had your angel tonight"
Nightwish - Wish I had an Angel Tonight

(in reply to pixelslave)

Post #: 12

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 5:38:18 PM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Saint

Walking behind someone has always been a natural thing for me. Even more so if it someone absolutely adored in my life. I dont consider that objectifying whatsoever, merely the natural order of things.

But don't you think that it's a nice perk to like and lust after the view from one pace behind and to the right?

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to Saint)

Post #: 13

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 6:33:57 PM

Saint

Posts: 279
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

But don't you think that it's a nice perk to like and lust after the view from one pace behind and to the right?

I think it is a wonderful perk of course, but I havent yet had the opportunity to be with the one that I could lust after while walking behind her. Someday I will of course. I just havent found my queen yet to allow that with me.

_____________________________

"Anonymity is synonymous with longevity."
Faethor Ferenczy

"I wish I had an angel
For one moment of love
I wish I had your angel tonight"
Nightwish - Wish I had an Angel Tonight

(in reply to MisPandora)

Post #: 14

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 10:03:47 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

I don't think it's wrong to be happy your sub or slave finds you attractive. What some of us (i.e. ME) have to work on is 1) realizing that we ARE attractive and 2) taking a complement about it!

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 15

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/10/2007 10:23:31 PM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

I don't think it's wrong to be happy your sub or slave finds you attractive. What some of us (i.e. ME) have to work on is 1) realizing that we ARE attractive and 2) taking a complement about it!

Master Fire

Touche. Fabulous point you have there Fire!

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 16

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/11/2007 5:29:26 AM

unravel

Posts: 90
Joined: 9/3/2007
Status: offline

Oh what a lovely post/topic!

i experienced this for a while, when i had to walk at all times half a step to a step behind my Dominant. Public or private setting did not matter, and it was truly a lovely and bond-deepening exercise because it asked for focus. A small thing, as really this is walking, but personally i believe in those small tokens of obedience and devotion on an every second, most mundane setting... basis.

Thanks for that thread it reminded me of beautiful feelings!

unravel

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 17

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/11/2007 8:46:03 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: pixelslave

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

quote:

ORIGINAL: aidan

Hmmm, to me it doesn't seem "unD/s" at all, to find your partner physically attractive. And it sounds weird to me that somebody would take that objectification. When did it become uncouth to be attracted to the person you're in a relationship with? If sexuality (not necessarily sex) is a part of the dynamic, why would that be a problem?

All the women I've submitted to I've found attractive. Never thought anything of it.

That's exactly how I feel, sorry if I didn't word it best.

But I have heard and read women (and a few men too) who say that any statement of how attractive another person is is the same as objectifying. So if someone extends that into the femdom dynamic they might see what Fox did as objectifying too.

I'm just wondering if others have similar experiences.

Hmmm... if a sub sees his Mistress as being akin to a Godess to worship and serve, I don't see how telling her how beautiful or sexy she is, is at all inconsistent with his D/s dynamic with her. More specifically, regardless of the dynamic, I've never met a woman, Domme or not, who didn't like to be genuinely complimented and have her ego boosted in some way or another by the man in her life.

- pixel

Collared to Majik

I have met women who say that, that's part of why I asked about it.

I ever had the weird experience of having another feminist tell me that I was only dominant to please my man... I believe I laughed at her because I introduced BDSM to all my partners until we found a community of similar minded people. And as a feminist I was also insulted by the woman who said this because it seemed to me that she completely forgot the entire part of feminism giving women the right to make choices and this was my choice.

Please, please, please, do not respond to this thread folks to talk about feminism. I just wanted to further explain part of why I started the thread and where I got the idea in the first place that it "might be objectifying" since it is certainly not my belief.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to pixelslave)

Post #: 18

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/11/2007 8:47:43 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

I don't think it's wrong to be happy your sub or slave finds you attractive. What some of us (i.e. ME) have to work on is 1) realizing that we ARE attractive and 2) taking a complement about it!

Master Fire

Yup. That ability comes and goes with me personally.

But then again it's the same with Fox and his own self image.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 19

RE: the pleasure of walking behind... - 11/11/2007 10:10:05 AM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

You are a very lucky woman Dr. Tammyjo! But you knew that already. :)

I am always pleased to be followed---I give a great view as I walk up stairs. <G>

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]

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Post #: 20

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