RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive



Message

liminalRapture -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/14/2007 7:01:56 AM)

Freedom for perfectionism!!!  If I make any mistake at all, I feel horrible.  If I suggest a walk and it rains, I'll beat myself up all day.  Hell, I still feel guilty for the 2004 elections and the Iraq war--if only I had worked a little harder, just a few extra phone calls or taken the chance of the war a little more seriously (I thought they were bluffing) and gone to a few more protests.  Now, intellectually, I know darn well I'm not responsible for the rain, the election or the war.  Stuff happens.  But I still feel in my bones that I'm responsible.

In a D/s (and I've only had one serious one) you let go of that.  You say "you're in charge" and then you start, incredibly slowly, in little baby steps, to believe it and not beat yourself up over stuff you can't control.



rubberpet -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/14/2007 7:27:32 AM)

[/quote]
No....it makes NO sense. Two wrongs don't make a right.

[/quote]

How do you consider it to be a "wrong"?  Why should I have to put aside what Mistress and I enjoy for the comfort of a few prudish, uptight, narrow-minded people when we are not doing anything the law would describe as "indecent"?  I've been walked around a public park on a leash in just a latex catsuit by a domme friend and while some people gave unfavorable looks to us, the cops at the park gave us no hassle about it.  In fact, as we were feeding ducks at the park, a little four year old boy comes up behind me and squeezes my butt and says, "Shiny!"  For a second, his mom was so embarrassed, then she struck up a conversation with us about my catsuit.  It was so funny!



gentlestarZR -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/14/2007 7:36:18 AM)

i think because my soul feels free and complete when i am with Master .. its very hard to explain but i dont have to hid what i am i dont have to hide desires .. sometimes hiding it all in from the outside world is exhuasting so when i just give in and be what i truely am as a slave .. i am very free and complete



breatheasone -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/14/2007 7:51:01 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: gentlestarZR

i think because my soul feels free and complete when i am with Master .. its very hard to explain but i dont have to hid what i am i dont have to hide desires .. sometimes hiding it all in from the outside world is exhuasting so when i just give in and be what i truely am as a slave .. i am very free and complete

I get what you mean....my Master is always telling me I am "Free in Him" Its He that set me free....not my slavery to Him that set my free. Because of that I am free to be that slave though.



unravel -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/14/2007 2:25:32 PM)


Great topic, thank you.
To me the freedom comes from embracing my submissive nature, from "letting go" of any psychological barrier and let myself be.
Similarly, it is a matter of my embracing what i have with the Dominant, and all of the relationship.
So, in that way, it is the most "free-ing" experience i ever encountered. In a way it could be said that it is a freedom from the constraints i consciously or sub-consciously impose(d) on myself, to let my inner myself be.
And it is a long process to me, and while being with a Dominant can triggers moments of "free-ing" exaltation, i feel the deep freedom feeling comes slowly and nicely to me, as i said, as an embrace.
babbling on, unravel



MystressDream -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/14/2007 4:10:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: unravel


Great topic, thank you.
To me the freedom comes from embracing my submissive nature, from "letting go" of any psychological barrier and let myself be.
Similarly, it is a matter of my embracing what i have with the Dominant, and all of the relationship.
So, in that way, it is the most "free-ing" experience i ever encountered. In a way it could be said that it is a freedom from the constraints i consciously or sub-consciously impose(d) on myself, to let my inner myself be.
And it is a long process to me, and while being with a Dominant can triggers moments of "free-ing" exaltation, i feel the deep freedom feeling comes slowly and nicely to me, as i said, as an embrace.
babbling on, unravel


Very nicely worded.  I am always amazed at the thoughts and feelings shared by some of the men on here.  Thank you.



AFlyInYourWeb -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/14/2007 5:33:39 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: spankmepink11

When people say this, what exactly do they mean?   And why were they not free to be themselves before they become owned or submitted themselves to someone.



It is a freedom from societal stereotypes and the inhibitions those stereotypes impose on me.   When I am in a caring D/s relationship with the right woman, and I get home, I feel like I've just shed fifty pounds of body armor.  I don't have to be what others, including most vanilla women, expect of me.

Here are a few "alternate" meanings of "freedom" from Dictionary.com that may apply to the phrase "freedom through slavery" in my case:

6. exemption from the presence of anything specified (usually fol. by from): freedom from fear.

7. the absence of or release from ties, obligations, etc.

8. ease or facility of movement or action: to enjoy the freedom of living in the country.

9. frankness of manner or speech.

11. the absence of ceremony or reserve.

Exemption from the fear of being judged because my preferences are unconventional for a male in Western society. 

Released from the ties of a gender stereotype, and obligations to be the bloody leader. 

Enjoying living the style of life I prefer for me. 

Being able to be frank about my fantasies and fetishes with someone who will be non-judgemental. 

The "absence of reserve" is the absence of inhibition.

Oh, and did I mention it's fun??  Call that one "freedom in the pursuit of happiness"!!











AnimusRex -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/14/2007 6:17:19 PM)

I can't speak for submissives of course, but I do witness something when I am trying to provide direction to a girl. Often a girl is so eager to serve and submit, she ends up trying to seize control, trying to make everything perfect for Master, trying to second guess what he might like, what He would like to do, etc, that I have to command her to stop, and simply be still, and feel free to not plan, not worry, not try to calculate all the angles, and simply be free to follow directions without trying to set the course. This is hard, since it requires them to trust- its actually easier to be the super-nanny than it is to trust in the wisdom and direction of your Dominant. I have always considered that concept to be what people refer to in the freedom of slavery.



rubberpet -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/14/2007 7:13:20 PM)

Very well said, Animus.  For a slave who's a perfectionist, he/she is more focused on making things perfect rather than just following the specified directions.  The freedom of slavery is to just listen and hear the command given, ignore the external factors, and just follow the instructions laid out.  If the directions are followed, the task is accomplished and the dominant is pleased.  The accomplishment doesn't have to be "perfect" because what matters most is the dominant's command was obeyed to the letter, therefore making it perfect.  Problem solved.  [:D]



AEslaveM -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/15/2007 4:30:43 AM)

ownedgirlie said it all for me..........my greatest freedom comes within these walls.........and the day to day dynamic we share as Master/slave has only added to the happiness within me that i was afraid to even seek...............



MasterFireMaam -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/15/2007 2:40:19 PM)

There is freedom in surrender...and for me, I surrender to my calling and the Universe (my higher power) as my slaves surrender to me. Here's a quote that one shared only yesterday...

From Chop Wood, Carry Water:

Surrender:

"The notion of surrender is a tricky one in our culture, bringing up images of defeat and weakness. True surrender, of course, is something very different from "giving up the ship". It is at the heart of the spiritual life, -the great mystery-, and it is only natural, somehow, that surrender is also at the heart of a loving relationship...."



dawntreader -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/16/2007 6:34:15 AM)

julietsierra,
 
What a beautiful post!!
Your story is my story - thankyou for posting it[:)]



dawntreader -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/16/2007 6:36:59 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

There is freedom in surrender...and for me, I surrender to my calling and the Universe (my higher power) as my slaves surrender to me. Here's a quote that one shared only yesterday...

From Chop Wood, Carry Water:

Surrender:

"The notion of surrender is a tricky one in our culture, bringing up images of defeat and weakness. True surrender, of course, is something very different from "giving up the ship". It is at the heart of the spiritual life, -the great mystery-, and it is only natural, somehow, that surrender is also at the heart of a loving relationship...."



Well said!!
Surrender, both spiritually and submissively is the theme of this current season of my life. It has made for a beautiful experience so far~



hisdevotedtoy -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/16/2007 11:17:06 PM)

For me i have used this term, and it did not imply that prior to this relationship i wasn't free.  i use it more as a self discovery.  Master has opened my eyes to this side of me, and as such there is a 'freedom of expression' someone out there who likes what i have to offer, and takes pleasure in my kinky-ness so to speak.  i enjoy being Masters' slave... without Him, i suppose i couldn't have that title of 'slave' cause that would imply that someone masters' me.  i would be submissive in nature i suppose... so for me, 'i am free to be His slave' and have never felt better... that is how i use the term.



divaslave -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/22/2007 1:04:49 AM)

i am new to chatrooms. my OWNER, DIVINE MISTRESS DIVA  has ordered HER slave to communicate with other like-minded male slaves and compare experiences/ needs. i have been submissive for as long as i can remember but only got involved in the scene about 20 years ago. Up until HER tragic death in late 2005, i had been MISTRESS DEE-ANNES'S 24/7 for nearly 4 years, i am now being distance trained by DIVINE MISTRESS DIVA to serve, please and obey HER. HER dvoted slave is so very, very happy, grateful and honoured to be the totally owned and controlled property of DIVINE MISTRESS DIVA. i only feel totally whole and complete when i am owned by a truly dominant MISTRESS. Pleasing my adored and worshipped OWNER is what gives me the greatest pleasure. 



agirl -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/22/2007 6:41:24 AM)

I certainly feel freer now, than at any time in my life but it's nothing to do with slavery/submission. It's being with someone that understands and accepts me. If the D/s and bdsm was stripped away.....the freedom would still exist because it's about the man that M is, not about the *lifestyle*.

agirl



stella41b -> RE: Freedom through slavery/submission (11/22/2007 5:54:34 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: rubberpet

Thank you for the kind words, spankmepink.  But to answer your question, if Mistress wanted me in full latex and on Her leash in a grocery store, I would do it in a heartbeat because it's what pleases Her.  Obviously, She wouldn't do anything that would put me in harm's way or in a situation where I could be arrested.  But the message I'm trying to convey is not having to worry about anything else except Mistress's happiness and pleasure.  I lose myself in the fact that it's for Mistress's pleasure.  Everyone elses's reaction is irrelevant to me at that point.  [:)]



Point taken. But you wouldn't check her if she wanted to really do this? I'm not trying to question your devotion, it's admirable, but surely the submissive role is a little more than blind obedience and submission?

quote:

ORIGINAL: rubberpet
As for those who see it as I'm forcing non-consenting parties into my kink, I think the same non-consenting parties are forcing me to conform to their standard of normality by suppressing my kink for their comfort.  I live my life with Mistress for Mistress, not theirs.  To me, it's no different than a mother who goes to Wal-Mart with her five kids and they are running all over the place causing havoc and making trouble.  She is forcing me to take part in her trainwreck of an undisciplined homelife.  So my thinking is this...if they don't like what they see, just don't look at it and walk away.  Make sense?


No, to me this doesn't make sense at all. It's not the same situation. You being taken in your latex suit on a leash by your Mistress to the store is a result of a conscious choice being made by both of you.

You cannot compare the two situations. How can you be so sure that the mother of those five children has made the same choice and conscious decision? The mother might have been unable to find someone to look after her children. She might be in an abusive relationship with her husband and be little more than a domestic slave at home.

The other thing is young children tend to be boisterous and even if she did make a conscious decision to take all her kids to Wal-Mart, I for one cannot see how a mother having five children can be seen as being kinky whereas being taken to a store in a latex suit on a leash by a Mistress is to me definitely kinky. You calling that family a trainwreck is your opinion and judgment, I call it a large family.



Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
4.699707E-02