Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (Full Version)

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MistressTuf -> Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 9:46:03 AM)

Greetings......this is my first Forum post, but something I have been thinking a lot about lately and would like to get others' feedback on.
 
small introduction of myself....15 yrs r/l lifestyle Domme/submissive switch...collared by One man in that time, <ResidentSadist>....uncollared as of now.
 
Having spent a few years in the life and experienced relationships both within and without of Ownership situations.  I have recently learned something about myself and ownership as it pertains to my primal core.....I cannot experience the depth of connection without Ownership involved.  That applies to both sides of my Switch coin....though I may enjoy interaction with others who are dear friends, without Ownership involved it will never touch me like that primal Tribal feeling...that only Ownership brings out.  
 
Something about Ownership seems to go straight to my animalistic instinct. 
 
Thoughts anyone?
 
MistressTuf/masokissedri



Rover -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 10:01:14 AM)

I have no idea what "Tribal" is, but (consensual) ownership rocks my world as well.
 
John



thetammyjo -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 10:08:08 AM)

Yeah, I'm also not sure of the tribal thing but for me, owning someone feels very natural to me.

Now I work hard to make sure that I only own those who have given their consent but it feels very natural to me like just another way to care about and love someone.

I would not be surprised if the first word I ever said was "Mine" while hugging whatever it was and gently petting it.



bipolarber -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 10:13:08 AM)

Yes, I prefer being owned as well.

BTW, welcome back, "Dommiguy" we missed ya!



MistressTuf -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 10:16:47 AM)

Tribal mind versus Ratinal mind,  as defined by Lee Harris in "The Suicide of Reason"
 
"Whereas the rational actor asks himself, "What is best for me," the tribal actor must ask himself, "What is best for us?"  What matters for the tribal actor is not the pursuit of his enlightened self-interest but rather the success of his tribe."
 
I hope this helps explain my thoughts on Tribe.
 
smiles,
Tuf



ResidentSadist -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 10:21:04 AM)

Being personally addicted to the jingle the ownership collar makes, I can only confirm that I only feel “free” to be myself and let the inner beast out with that which I own.  Passion, romance or raw sex doesn’t even sound right to me if I can’t hear the collar jingling.   

Partners in casual (un-owned) encounters never see my beast or feel the full force of my unbridled and aggressive passions or emotions.



thetammyjo -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 10:22:44 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressTuf

Tribal mind versus Ratinal mind, as defined by Lee Harris in "The Suicide of Reason"

"Whereas the rational actor asks himself, "What is best for me," the tribal actor must ask himself, "What is best for us?" What matters for the tribal actor is not the pursuit of his enlightened self-interest but rather the success of his tribe."

I hope this helps explain my thoughts on Tribe.

smiles,
Tuf


This helps and now I clarify what I said.

Yes, when I feel like I own someone or something for that matter, I do consider the person or object and how to best utilize it/him/her for everyone's benefit. Usually that means the two of us or the family if not a greater community.

I don't consciously think that but it is how I react most of the time.

Oh, I can be selfish in a bad way, can't we all, but usually I'm not.



Rover -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 10:23:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressTuf

Tribal mind versus Ratinal mind,  as defined by Lee Harris in "The Suicide of Reason"
 
"Whereas the rational actor asks himself, "What is best for me," the tribal actor must ask himself, "What is best for us?"  What matters for the tribal actor is not the pursuit of his enlightened self-interest but rather the success of his tribe."
 
I hope this helps explain my thoughts on Tribe.
 
smiles,
Tuf


Ok, I can understand that in the context of a committed ownership relationship dynamic. 
 
John



Celeste43 -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 11:58:30 AM)

I still don't understand the use of the word tribal. If you're involved in a healthy relationship, then of course there are times when the right course of action for the relationship may not be what either of you prefers. But that's a rational decision, to ensure the ongoing happiness of both in the relationship by putting the relationship first.

Unless you were involved in a poly family and thought of it as a village of people?



TenderMistress -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 1:35:40 PM)

I'm not sure my feelings would fall under "Tribal" but they certainly do grow stronger when Ownership is involved.

For me, it's because of the depth of the connection I have with that person. When just playing or interacting, it's just not the same. Maybe it's in the energy that's shared with each other. Maybe it's the developed bond. But when Ownership is involved, the acts themselves take on a whole new meaning, and level of intimacy in most cases. Then again, that may just be the result of how much value I place on the subject of Ownership altogether. Doesn't matter though. It is what it is, and it's right for me.



MistressTuf -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 2:06:03 PM)

well said....TenderMistress.....that articulated exactly what I was saying I had recently learned about myself.
 
and to the question about poly.....yes to me tribe is from a poly mindset and lifestyle.  but Tribe is not only those who live with me, it is also my friends House in Providence....they are my Tribe as well. 



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 2:41:54 PM)

For me that is what love is, not necessarily ownership or Ds.  For me, love necessitates that I encourage the other person to be true to who they are above all else- even if that means we can't be in a relationship together.



MistressTuf -> RE: Ownership and Tribal connection in BDSM (11/16/2007 5:27:55 PM)

Lucky A...I suppose for me I cannot have BDSM or M/s without being in love.....they cannot be seperated.



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