RE: differences in genders

RE: differences in genders (Full Version)

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mhawk -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 5:48:24 AM)
Adkit, sometimes words can have quite an impact on people. if any "flaming" was done it was based entirely on how you chose you words. most here understand quite a bit.as far as "hatred", what hatred do you speak of,personally i did not see any,but that's just an opinion,everyone has them and .are entitled to them. my Lord's wife is a switch.when it is my place to serve Her,She is my Mistress,She only bottoms to Our Lord.not once as my Mistress has She ever acted like a "bitch", yes, She does have "power" over me but She does not treat me like a "mindless slave". when we are outside of my Lord or my Mistress deciding to interact with me,we kick back and relax together.now don't me me wrong,if i was to act out of line with either of them i would be punished for it but not because He or She is being an asshole or a bitch,but because it is to correct the wrong i did. i do not hate you for what you had stated earlier,you came and asked a question and people responded,it's action and reaction.and also as someone else stated that some of us have even wished you luck in your search for what it is you are looking for.

juliaoceania -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 5:48:36 AM)
Would that be "the twinkie defense"?[:D]

Cloudz -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 6:30:37 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Adkit man, you people seem to think having an opinion is worth flaming now. I personally dont think anything I said was wrong other than the fact that it sounded like I put stereotypes on everyone even though I havent met all of them. and I do remember pointing out that I was new here so I thought it was obvious that I'm just pointing my FIRST IMPRESSIONS. I think my entire point was shown pretty well in your replies, some of you replied with fierce, bottled hate and some of you with understanding and guidance. where's the middleground? x.x I guess it's not really about genders now that I think about it. but my point still stands: if you're a switch like me then you're not getting the same offers from the male and the female sides! ...sounds like I struck a nerve on a lot of you. Hmmm, you defend your comments by stating they were first impressions. It took you approximately 6 days from the time you joined until the time you posted your comments. There is much to learn here, from many fine people. However...one must be willing to be educated. I suspect that might take longer than 6 days...Good luck, and I hope you hang around...albeit quietly for a bit, you will be surprised at the good people you will find here. Best of luck to you.

RRafe -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 7:52:00 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: wisteriaV Master and I both agree the kid ate too many twinkies before posting this.[:D] I call romance novels "twinkies" [:D]

thetammyjo -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 8:04:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Adkit I've only been here a short time (mostly for fun) but I've noticed one big thing that frankly, I dont think is fair: when you see a female looking for a dom they write up a list of what they will and will not do, tell people that they dont want to be called names, explain that they wont just subjegate themselves to anyone and that they only will accept you as a dom if you deserve it enough. but when you see a female looking for a SUB they only say something in the lines of "I'm your godess, you will pamper and spoil me and I will call you names and abuse you, only write to me if you're willing to give me everything for nothing". now, I'm not saying they're not allowed to feel that way...but I'm male and I wouldnt mind being either a sub or a dom. but I do NOT want to worship some stranger just because she's got bewbs like a mindless slave. if I wanted to subjegate myself I too would want to respect that person first and I dont want to be called names either. my problem is; why do women expect the doms to be all those things when they act like bitches themselves when they're dom-ing? maybe guys do the same thing here, I dont know. but it sounds really unfair...because I wouldnt mind getting a few orders and taking a punishment if I fail but I dont want to become a doormat. where are the kind, caring, sensible female doms? You may want to consider what types of profiles are attracting your attention. Have you actually looked at a large enough sampling of the profiles to make said claims? You'd need to apply objective sampling strategy to approach that and my guess is that you aren't, you are looking at profiles that catch your eye in some way. What is catching your eye by be related to the attitude you read.

Adkit -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 8:09:55 AM)
they dont make twinkies in Sweden.

Adkit -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 8:35:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: thetammyjo You may want to consider what types of profiles are attracting your attention. Have you actually looked at a large enough sampling of the profiles to make said claims? You'd need to apply objective sampling strategy to approach that and my guess is that you aren't, you are looking at profiles that catch your eye in some way. What is catching your eye by be related to the attitude you read. you know, that's what I've always done. and the problem I have isnt with the 5% that I can relate to, understand, talk to without being ignored and trust...the problem I have is with the other 95%. the people that are the "norm". disliking the norm sounds like a loosing battle, I know. but shouldnt I be who I want to be? I honestly think I'm right. should I just accept that "life is unfair, deal with it"? I'm sorry but that mentality is just...unpractical. oh and btw, I'm not "submissive" to the person who basically called me that. :S I think that's pretty obvious from the way I bitch and whine!

camille65 -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 8:50:25 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Adkit they dont make twinkies in Sweden. Count yourself as lucky, IMO twinkies are repulsive and will probably outlast cockroaches!

thetammyjo -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 9:19:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Adkit quote: ORIGINAL: thetammyjo You may want to consider what types of profiles are attracting your attention. Have you actually looked at a large enough sampling of the profiles to make said claims? You'd need to apply objective sampling strategy to approach that and my guess is that you aren't, you are looking at profiles that catch your eye in some way. What is catching your eye by be related to the attitude you read. you know, that's what I've always done. and the problem I have isnt with the 5% that I can relate to, understand, talk to without being ignored and trust...the problem I have is with the other 95%. the people that are the "norm". disliking the norm sounds like a loosing battle, I know. but shouldnt I be who I want to be? I honestly think I'm right. should I just accept that "life is unfair, deal with it"? I'm sorry but that mentality is just...unpractical. oh and btw, I'm not "submissive" to the person who basically called me that. :S I think that's pretty obvious from the way I bitch and whine! It isn't so much to just accept as it is to realize that by being a certain way that annoys you, that person has done you a good service -- you now know not to spend any more time on them. There are so many people out there who claim the word "kinky" and it's various forms that it is always useful to me when they portray themselves in a way that turns me off -- one less person to consider in my busy life. Think of how difficult it can be to find a compatible vanilla partner. Now add into that all the variations of BDSM or other sexualities and it is far more difficult. Have you gotten into your local or nearby BDSM community, Adkit? That can be a wonderful way to get to know yourself and others without the stress of finding a partner (in my strong opinion). Another benefit to these meetings is that repeated exposure to people generally increases our ability to read them more accurately. Online we can type anything but maintaining a facade over months is very difficult for most of us. I hope this encourages you a bit.

laurell3 -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 1:56:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: RRafe quote: ORIGINAL: juliaoceania quote: ORIGINAL: RRafe It happens because people enable it. Stop enabling it-and things will change-but don't hold your breath waiting-god forbid anyone control thier libido long enough. You do realize that he has reduced the entire female population into submissives that top from the bottom or out and out bitches.... What do you imagine would happen if MEN stopped wanting sex for a month-worldwide? And stuck to it? Hitachi would make alot more money and men would be bitchy???

laurell3 -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 2:03:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Adkit quote: ORIGINAL: thetammyjo You may want to consider what types of profiles are attracting your attention. Have you actually looked at a large enough sampling of the profiles to make said claims? You'd need to apply objective sampling strategy to approach that and my guess is that you aren't, you are looking at profiles that catch your eye in some way. What is catching your eye by be related to the attitude you read. you know, that's what I've always done. and the problem I have isnt with the 5% that I can relate to, understand, talk to without being ignored and trust...the problem I have is with the other 95%. the people that are the "norm". disliking the norm sounds like a loosing battle, I know. but shouldnt I be who I want to be? I honestly think I'm right. should I just accept that "life is unfair, deal with it"? I'm sorry but that mentality is just...unpractical. oh and btw, I'm not "submissive" to the person who basically called me that. :S I think that's pretty obvious from the way I bitch and whine! As I stated above, most people here will not be compatible for you. That's however, true for all of us regardless of gender. It is not an easy search for most. You should reread your first post, you did essentially call the entire female population bitches, lol. Not a likely helpful approach to what I know is a frustrating search. Anyhow, good luck to you! Patience and humor are key here.

hands0n0knees -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 3:29:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: toservez quote: ORIGINAL: hands0n0knees There are more losers, male and female, than winners in the online BDSM scene. The mindless Dommes don't deserve any more respect than the mindless Doms or male subs. But there are some very thoughtful dommes out there. Just look them up and ignore the rest. I agree with this except for the degrading “more losers…than winners”. No role or gender escapes the cyber self grandiose and delusional. There is just a percentage, which can be argued to the most boring death, in each group. Only the games are different between the roles and genders not what is considered respectful and sincere. Well, if anyone is to be degraded, it may as well be people into BDSM. [;)] Due to the quantative imbalance between males and females here, the male cyber self necessarily descends into appealing to the female market. Men who want it too much are left, in desperation, to beg for attention. They'll say what they think the women want to hear, which, of course, is not what women want to hear. The plain fact is that there might be someone compatible with you here or there might not be. I've just spent a lovely evening getting slowly drunk and debating the merits and demerits of a militant feminist bdsm with a woman from Norway. It's a very specific fantasy, which I doubt even anyone reading this thread shares. If either of us has given into desperation and tried to appeal to the market instead of our own desires we wouldn't have found each other, and I would probably have done something constructive with my time. [&:]

hands0n0knees -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 3:37:09 PM)
Yeah, so, in other words, Adkit, your observation is accurate, but don't let it get you down: those guys will lose out when all of this is taken in aggregate.

Adkit -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 3:42:55 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 As I stated above, most people here will not be compatible for you. That's however, true for all of us regardless of gender. It is not an easy search for most. You should reread your first post, you did essentially call the entire female population bitches, lol. Not a likely helpful approach to what I know is a frustrating search. Anyhow, good luck to you! Patience and humor are key here. but the entire female population ARE b...no, I can't even say it as a joke. patience might be key but humor just don't play well on internet forums. x.x

laurell3 -> RE: differences in genders (11/20/2007 3:44:28 PM)
well we dont know you and most new posters are bitching, not joking. I usually actually put (this is a joke), that may seem silly, but it saves some confusion.

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