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Mercnbeth -> RE: The condition of being a slave (11/20/2007 10:34:09 AM)
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beth asked me this morning how I knew that she was a slave versus a submissive. (And yes I am of the belief that there is a difference.) I see she chose not to include any of what I said to her.
quote:
How did you come to realize you were a slave? Did you just know?
Regarding beth, I know because from the first there was no compromise or negotiation from her concerning her submission to me. I may have seen fear, concern, and anxiety in her face. I may have noted a tone of aversion in her compliant voice saying; "yes Master". her body language sometimes provides a 'tell' that, with a choice, she may have participated in something I wanted her to experience. However there has never been a time when I saw, heard, or felt any resignation in service.
Instead I saw, and see, an intellectual process going on within her that defines her slavery to me. she overcomes her concern, and perhaps her aversion to something I require of her by drawing upon, for lack of a better term, her slave-self. her persona is not lost in the process, its enhanced. What is being overcome is 35 or so years of family, friends, lovers, and 'professional' counselors; referring to her 'slave' persona as "sick". The vehicle for this self discovery is our relationship. The fuel that makes it go is uncompromising trust in each other.
Every scene, and every experience we share has one goal for both of us. The words I use with her, often during 'play', are "go deeper!" Although I'm expressing them out loud to her, often I doubt her conscience mind has the ability to hear. her conscience hearing the words isn't important. The ongoing and never ending focus on deepening our knowledge of ourselves as well as each other is.
'Master' and 'slave' are irrelevant labels outside the context of a relationship that defines them. Within a relationship they are similarly meaningless to anyone outside it. The words serve a short cut purpose. Maybe for some they provide some form of comfort or status. Having a "Master Certificate" granted by the 'Ancient Royal Order of the Old Swiss Chard', or the print out of your "slave Registry" bar code; hanging on your wall may be important to some, but "the condition of being a slave" or Master, is a function of you and your partner.
beth is my slave - I am her Master only meaningful and appropriate for each other, for the duration of our relationship. We define the words for each other. We feel very fortunate to have compatible and complimentary desires and fantasies that fall within that common definition.
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