Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Do You Practice What You Preach?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> Do You Practice What You Preach? Page: [1]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 4:54:41 PM   
sammiebabygirl


Posts: 465
Joined: 10/23/2004
From: Upstate, NY
Status: offline 		Or do you live by, "do as I say and not as I do"?
 
As a Master/Dom, do you think it is important to model the behavior you expect from your sub?
 
jen

< Message edited by sammiebabygirl -- 11/26/2007 4:55:55 PM >

_____________________________

"Men are like pianos. When they get upright, i feel GRAND!!!"

http://charldine.com/jen2820
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 5:39:57 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		Nope.  I find it's important to model the values and expectations I hold important.  I also choose a partner who is compatible with those values, so often our behavior and values reflect from and towards eachother.

But we don't need to be identical and just because I suck at some things doesn't mean it's ok for him to suck at the same things and vice versa. 

Ds = double standard

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 5:46:20 PM   
SirJohnMandevill


Posts: 546
Joined: 11/10/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Nope.  I find it's important to model the values and expectations I hold important.  I also choose a partner who is compatible with those values, so often our behavior and values reflect from and towards eachother.



Well said! My previous partners and I have complemented each other, but we weren't clones.

Les (Purveyor of Fine Kinkiness since...well, for a long, long time)

_____________________________

Iam an eroticist
I am a fully eroticized being
No more neuroses
I found my strip naked soul soup
With the deviant ingredient
---The B-52s

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 6:15:55 PM   
Tigrita


Posts: 484
Joined: 8/16/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		I'd be pretty sad if my dominant modeled the behaviors he expected of me, like being desperately hungry for cock, wimpering, begging, showing fear and reverance to an intense stare or a hungry growl...

Hehe, I know that isn't what you meant ;)

I think like LA said, our values are compatible, we wouldn't be together otherwise.  I wouldn't be with someone who didn't at least try to practice what they preach, though no one is perfect.

As a switch, and alpha to the slave in our relationship, I believe it is important to practice what I preach, set a good example.  Though I could see that if there was something she's just much better at than me, I don't think it is unreasonable to encourage and expect her to maintain that, even if it isn't my forte (like being responsible about debt and car maintenance for example...    )

_____________________________

~ Tigrita

There is no right path, only the path you take.

Success is making life happen, versus just letting life happen to you.

"Many of the things I enjoy, I enjoy because I don't enjoy them." - Charlotte

(in reply to SirJohnMandevill)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 6:19:24 PM   
MadRabbit


Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sammiebabygirl

Or do you live by, "do as I say and not as I do"?
 
As a Master/Dom, do you think it is important to model the behavior you expect from your sub?
 
jen


It's a great ideal to have, but pragmatically, expecting a dominant to do everything he/she wants you to do to the perfect T every single time and in every single situation is just setting you up for a lot of resentment and disapointment.



_____________________________

Advice for New Dominants
The Unpolitically Correct Lifestyle Definitions

Obama is NOT the Messiah! He's just a VERY NAUGHTY BOY

(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 7:12:54 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		If you are talking about things such as honesty, loyalty, etc., by all means yes.

< Message edited by Estring -- 11/26/2007 7:13:21 PM >

_____________________________

Boycott Whales!

(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 7:15:08 PM   
MrSpectacular


Posts: 1153
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		Always - you get out of life what you put in - the same goes for relationships 

_____________________________

Yes I am Spectacular and they are real!

(in reply to Estring)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 7:18:30 PM   
Rushemery


Posts: 310
Joined: 9/10/2007
Status: offline 		yes

(in reply to MrSpectacular)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 9:29:12 PM   
FrankAr


Posts: 817
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sammiebabygirl

Or do you live by, "do as I say and not as I do"?
 
As a Master/Dom, do you think it is important to model the behavior you expect from your sub?
 
jen


Greetings jen,

I can only live by my high standards in life that I set for myself, and these are very high.  I also let the female know that I have only ONE life to live by, MINE, she has no life, she only does what I tell her to.  Do as I say, yes, do as I do, well she can't.    I just live by my standards, if she wants to try to live by them, so then we can go down the road, if she doesn't, then at least she KNOWS beforehand, she can then decide. 

Like others have informed you, people can only live by their own skin, why  would others try to live within that same skin.  Live in your own skin and be a ying yang to the other.

Be well.

Frank Ar.


_____________________________

I am just me, simple ol me.

Even the softest whisper can be heard in the loudest group....Frank H.

(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 11:01:46 PM   
HeavansKeeper


Posts: 1254
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline 		My Pet has to earn the privilege of being taught by example.  That said, if she reads over my journal she'll find the phrase "Master yourself. Master her."  It's my mantra.

My point is, I make sure she understands that she does not have the right to be taught by example, that it is a gift.  I can't recall a time when I've said "Do as I say, not as I do."

_____________________________

The Loving Owner of HisHeavan

... You've waited your whole life for this moment...

(in reply to FrankAr)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/26/2007 11:07:01 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sammiebabygirl

Or do you live by, "do as I say and not as I do"?
 
As a Master/Dom, do you think it is important to model the behavior you expect from your sub?
 
jen


What he expects from me is unique to my needs, growth, development, and service to him as a slave.  It would not make sense for my Master to model this behavior. 

(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/27/2007 3:30:38 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline 		On most things but not all.
 
As far as honesty, principles and sense of justice etc goes, yes, I like to lead by example.
 
As far as personal preferences go, those are *MINE* to choose.  For eg, around home casually dressed is me in shorts and T shirt; for the girl it's often a lot less or nothing at all. 
 
There *are* some perks for being in charge.... *wink*
 
Focus.

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/27/2007 6:36:20 AM   
Vanatru


Posts: 300
Joined: 4/16/2004
Status: offline 		If anything, I am more critical of my own actions and words than of others. Setting up my own measuring stick of conduct was one of the first things I did growing up. As far as expected action, like ownedgirlie said, I and mine have complimentary positions.

Edit: if I'm not doing my part, how would I expect mine to do their part?

< Message edited by Vanatru -- 11/27/2007 6:37:23 AM >

(in reply to Focus50)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/27/2007 6:53:29 AM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline 		Yes jen I do practice what I preach for if I didn't it would be a bad example to mine......

_____________________________

US going to hell in a hand basket/

(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/27/2007 7:16:43 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		Someone I think is very wise once said, "You don't have to be perfect...you only have to be one step ahead of your slave." So, sometimes it's, "Don't do as I DID."

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/27/2007 11:15:13 AM   
sammiebabygirl


Posts: 465
Joined: 10/23/2004
From: Upstate, NY
Status: offline 		Thanks for all the responses. I find them all very interesting.
 
The reason I asked is because I know myself and that I need consistency from a Dominant. Otherwise, I get mixed messages and have difficulty following directions.
 
jen

_____________________________

"Men are like pianos. When they get upright, i feel GRAND!!!"

http://charldine.com/jen2820

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/27/2007 11:42:56 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		I didnt have to think very hard for an answer to this question.... The answer for me is no...I'm afraid I don't, not all the time...but I do try to improve where I can.

_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
Mike posts in black font
candy posts in pink font

(in reply to sammiebabygirl)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Do You Practice What You Preach? - 11/27/2007 12:35:40 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I do see myself as a role model, and in terms of values, integrity, and personal behavior, I hold myself to a high standard.  I don't necessarily expect to have the same skill set as my submissives, but I don't get to be a hypocrite either.

_____________________________

[page 23 girl]



(in reply to breatheasone)
Profile   Post #: 18
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> Do You Practice What You Preach? Page: [1]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078