would you go vanilla?

would you go vanilla? (Full Version)

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kirby104 -> would you go vanilla? (11/27/2007 9:50:58 PM)
Presently, I definitely would as I have much much disappointment. I have had to turn to other outlets, such as art. Why? Being kinky brings heartbreak. I found that I am a top who enjoys bottoming, but there isn't an outlet for either. I am just adrift. I know better than to ask for help here. This is just another outlet.

azropedntied -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/27/2007 9:58:23 PM)
N E V E R - its who i am not a coat i can take off and put on again , and i shall be this way til death .

SweetSarijane -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/27/2007 10:06:15 PM)
It's part of what makes me, me. No I wouldn't go back. I'm fortunate to be involved in local groups and have great friends and my bottoming needs are met enough to keep me going, though not as much or often as I'd like.

texancutie2 -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/27/2007 10:13:35 PM)
Never again...have been turned to the dark side. Though if I make 75 years of age and can no longer do this and am alone with my cat for company, or even multiple cats since I will be the cat lady of Houston, I may change my mind. Not to make light of your situation, am sorry you can't find the right person for you.

denika -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/27/2007 10:16:15 PM)
You are basicly describing a switch and there are alot of places you can fit in... heartbreak exists in mainstream and BDSM. Part of what makes me, me is being a submissive/masochist/slave/poly/bi/wife--- lol pick your term out of the long list of many things that make up who I am and I would not trade or change any of it. Wolf's denika

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/27/2007 10:23:56 PM)
It's not being kinky that causes you misery. That's like saying being black in the 1800s caused you to be miserable. Or having AIDS in the 80s. And those were a lot harder to hide than being kinky. I AM vanilla, in that I have vanilla relationships that I maintain very well, even my kinky relationship is vanilla based. I don't separate things out, I don't discriminate. Give up not being true to yourself, give up false expectations, give up bad judgement. Then see where you stand.

slavejale -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/27/2007 10:27:13 PM)
Greetings to the Free greetings to properties well technically Mistress (LuckyAlbatross) [please forgive me if You are not Mistress, i did not look at the profile first and this is fast reply] being black in the 1800's DID cause them to be miserable....just saying. technically. note: not trying to start a racial thing here, just stating a technical point. well wishes to All and all.

slavejale -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/27/2007 10:28:24 PM)
Greetings to the Free greetings to the properties i did forgot to add that NO i would not be um what's it called ...yeah vanilla. thats too weird for me. i am who i am... well wishes to All and all.

sexyone4you -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/27/2007 11:14:58 PM)
I've tried going back. It's boring. Don't do it! Step away from the light!

MistressSadie69 -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/27/2007 11:42:28 PM)
Depends on which sense you are talking about. Could I leave this site, drop my "title", and give up my "slaves"? Absolutely. I've found that most of the men I've met on here so far seem to be more trouble than they are worth. There is a ton of heartbreak waiting to be had, as there are many insincere people that abuse the fact that they are hiding behind a computer screen. However, I'm dominant by nature. I've worn the pants in every (noteworthy) relationship i've had. I'm opinionated, i'm sarcastic, and I like to have my way, and I don't like to wait to have it! lol. I'm also completely addicted to foot rubs, and so being with me means rubbing my feet- often. It's just part of the package. It's me, who I am, and I couldn't change it if I tried. Well, unless I lost both of my feet in some freak accident. [;)]

petpete -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/28/2007 12:25:52 AM)
Greetings F/folks. i presently have that dilemma myself. As a 44 year old male and having to live with vanilla partners married and as relationship i found that vanilla is alright for the short term. But then Y/you would find that You will be looking for the fetish or kink Y/you wish to satisfy for Y/yourself. Unless Y/your partner does not understand of Y/your (other) side then Y/you will have problems.. Interest will be lost from each other and parties will look elsewhere for satisfaction. (trust me i know first hand).. i have the same problem at the moment but i would rather stay single if i wont find that someone who can understand me. Cheers..

Dari -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/28/2007 3:09:28 AM)
I wouldn't go back to vanilla. Then again, when I stepped away from the BDSM lifestyle and went "vanilla," I was still so dominant in my dealings that when I returned to actively practicing the lifestyle, those few that I told what was going on looked at me and said - "Well of course." So honestly, while I think I could leave kink out of it - I don't think I could actually leave the D/s dynamic out of it, since I basically incorporate that dynamic into BDSM and vanilla relationships automatically.

LivingInSin -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/28/2007 6:41:57 AM)
Sometimes I wish I could. IMO this lifestyle doesnt leave you any barriers to hide from yourself. Everything, from feelings to sensations are deeper. I've tried "weaning" myself from the community but always seem to find myself coming back.

LadyPact -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/28/2007 6:57:43 AM)
This is a difficult question. Not one that I take lightheartedly. I'm going to go with your subject line, rather than your post. The question being, would I go (back to) vanilla? The truth of the matter is that I would. In fact, I've done so in the past. Would it be harder for Me today, already knowing what I know? It most certainly would. However, I would do so if the need was more important than needs of My own. There was a promise that I made about six years ago that would demand it.

LadyLynx -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/28/2007 6:57:52 AM)
At the moment I don't want to go back. Though it is frustrating trying to find partners. OP, if you havn't, you should consider looking into your local community, may have better luck there.

DesFIP -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/28/2007 7:09:27 AM)
Sensation wise, yes we will all have to give it up eventually. I doubt there are many 90 year olds still swinging floggers. But even in a non sensation relationship, I would still only be attracted to strong, patient men. I need to be able to turn to my partner in need, more than that, I need him to decide when he needs to take over, even when I claim I don't need that. I don't judge that very well.

IrishMist -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/28/2007 7:58:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kirby104 Presently, I definitely would as I have much much disappointment. I have had to turn to other outlets, such as art. Why? Being kinky brings heartbreak. I found that I am a top who enjoys bottoming, but there isn't an outlet for either. I am just adrift. I know better than to ask for help here. This is just another outlet. Define vanilla. /shrug

slavemaia -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/28/2007 8:01:26 AM)
No, i would never go totally vanilla as that would require me to go unconscious again about some very fundamental needs and desires to my own fulfillment and happiness.

AFlyInYourWeb -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/28/2007 8:11:12 AM)
No. If I did, I'd regret it...and probably in a matter of months, not years. Where does that leave my "vanilla" partner after I start to feel the regrets? It puts her in a position she probably doesn't want to be in. Why would I do that someone I presumably like? I'd rather be alone than to settle for "second-best".

RCdc -> RE: would you go vanilla? (11/28/2007 8:14:42 AM)
I agree (surprisesurprise) with LA. I don't discriminate or seperate either. I don't just switch off who or what I am. I couldn't even if I wanted to. Blaming disappointment on not being 'involved' or having an outlet is easy. Admitting it's your personal responsibility to be happy is much harder. the.dark.

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