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spanking help - 11/30/2007 11:33:41 PM

sublindsay

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Joined: 12/31/2006
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OK, please excuse my ignorance on this, but i really have no idea. I really would like to get into some more spanking situations with my b/f, but I am not sure what to use. I went to ExtremeRestraints.com but there are so many different things! Could someone please help me understand the different sensations that are caused by crops, paddles, floggers, canes and whips???? I would really like to know which one is best for me! Thanks sooooo much your help everyone.

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RE: spanking help - 11/30/2007 11:49:02 PM

laurell3

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Everyone is different in what they like as a bottom or like to use as a top. Even within the categories you listed there can be different sensations for different types of the same implements. However, one thing you should consider is that things like canes and whips require a bit of knowlege to use correctly without causing injury. There are a number of articles on safe practices. There are a number of toy sites that actually give severity ratings and tell you what type of sensation and/or markings you can expect from each. I'm sorry I don't have the sites for you, it's been quite awhile since I looked at them. Hopefully someone else will come along with links.

good luck,

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RE: spanking help - 12/1/2007 12:14:05 AM

NIrelandSubF

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Here's one which gives all their gear severity ratings - very quick delivery too, even to the UK.

http://www.aswgt.com/

(in reply to laurell3)

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RE: spanking help - 12/1/2007 1:54:32 AM

angelslave77

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floggers are great especially soft suede they feel yummy, I have found canes the hardest to take. And recently aquired a paddle which is fluffy on one side thick leather on the other mmmm nice. But everyone is different so it is a case of trying and seeing what you like

My alltime fav though is Sirs belt, not so much becuase of the sensation but because I know he thinks of me everytime he puts it on

(in reply to NIrelandSubF)

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RE: spanking help - 12/1/2007 7:04:46 AM

Drifa

Posts: 547
Joined: 7/27/2007
From: Rural Texas
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sublindsay

OK, please excuse my ignorance on this, but i really have no idea. I really would like to get into some more spanking situations with my b/f, but I am not sure what to use. I went to ExtremeRestraints.com but there are so many different things! Could someone please help me understand the different sensations that are caused by crops, paddles, floggers, canes and whips???? I would really like to know which one is best for me! Thanks sooooo much your help everyone.

The best bet is to experiment with different items in person. If there is a shop in your area that sells these toys, check it out. You can try them against your own arm or thigh to get an idea.

Better still is to find a BDSM conference or local munch in your area and see if you can find someone with a well-equipped toybag who will let you swing a couple of tools. Again, you can usually test on yoru own thigh to get an idea about the sensation.

It really gets down to what kind of sensation you want. For *me* a great, sensous warmup is an elkhide flogger with many falls (a "mop"). That doesn't actually hurt, it's impact, and soothing the way a good massage is. I love the flogger, but it was easily the most expensive item in my toybag. If I am having trouble getting to sleep, a flogging with the elkhide is relaxing enough to let me unwind and drift off.

Another warmup is hand-spanking. My Lady bought a nice pair of driving gloves she wears to make sure the sting is all in my fanny and not her hand

. Depending on where you hit, how hard, and how the hand is applied the sensation varies a lot, so don't overlook the possibilities here.

The next step for me is a strap of some kind. My Lady's belt works just fine for this. A belt is harder to control than a shorter strap with a handle or a "slapper", but *for me* the childhood association with the sound of the belt slithering out of the belt loops just makes it totally wonderful... (fans self). There is an even mixture of thud and sting in a strap usually... but a stiffer piece of leather also can bruise in two parallel lines where the edges bite.

After a bit of that, I'm good for almost anything. A crop is a nice tool, because you can barely flick it, all the way up to a hard stinging swat, and the length and stiffness of the shaft make it easy to control with good precision. Crops *also* are fairly inexpensive... Stateline Tack has some in the US$5 to $6 range, but even their higher-priced models are pretty inexpensive at less than $20. I find *generally* that a large store catering to actual equestrians is cheaper for crops than a sex toy outlet, YMMV.

My Lady *wants* to see me fighting against the bonds though, so the "fun" amount of sensation isn't all. We also have paddles, and sometimes I get a caning. This level of impact leaves bruises at a minimum most of the time, and inexpertly done can leave blood blisters or much worse. She's starting to learn the use of a signal whip, which really DOES have to have skill and precision using it. And we have a rubber flogger that is purely evil... the only toy in the collection I am ever tempted to run through the shredder/chipper then try to look innocent after, because it STINGS like a big [rude expletive here].

Before you go to a latigo flogger, or a rubber flogger, or canes, or a singletail whip, you really, really need to see these in use and check out the sensation to see if it's right for you.

(in reply to sublindsay)

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RE: spanking help - 12/3/2007 1:38:17 AM

EclipseAbove

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Perhaps some basic terminology and testing (as others have suggested) will help you. Sensations tend to be either "Thuddy" or "Stingy" (I suppose you could call those technical terms) or somewhere in between. So, what is Thuddy? Take a really fluffy down pilow and have someone whack you on the butt with it. That is about the most thuddy sensation you can get. Stingy is pretty much the opposite. Take a nice thin fresh twig that is thinner than a pencil and have someone whack you on the butt with it (or imagine what that would be like). Then determine what you (or your b/f) like - perhaps a little of everything. Usually in a session you will want to start out with thuddy and move into stingy if you are going to vary sensations because stingy tends to be much more intense and easier to take if you've been warmed up with thuddy first. You also will want to start out gentle and get more severe. Doing the reverse tends to make for very quick scenes.

Thuddy toys tend to be floggers with lots and lots of wide tails made of soft materials (suede and the like) - like a mop. As the tails get fewer, thinner and of a harder substance, you move more toward stingy. Fur lined paddles are also nicely thuddy. Anything that will make a nice slapping sound (wooden paddle, hairbrush, leather belt, crop, cane) is going to be pretty stingy. So are floggers with very few (or one) tails, braided tails or made of very hard substances (oil tanned leather) will be stingy with a single-tail whip being the most stingy (it can cut like a surgeon's scalpel depending on how you use it).

Since you are just starting out, look around the house for toys. A plain leather belt makes a good toy. As do wooden spoons, hairbrushes, etc. Get a sense of what you like and then get toys that fit. Some of the toys do require a certain amount of skill to use (floggers, whips, etc.) - so you may have to practice with them. When you go to buy toys though, keep in mind that a thuddy toy can be used to deliver a stingy sensation. But most of the time a stingy toy cannot deliver a thuddy sensation. Hope this helps.

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RE: spanking help - 12/3/2007 1:50:20 AM

DOM68005

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RE: spanking help - 12/3/2007 1:52:49 AM

DOM68005

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Attend a local group in your area. Many of the members will show you what they use.
I know when I have been able to attend, my items have been borrowed for a couple of swats.

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RE: spanking help - 12/3/2007 9:55:29 AM

deliciousmorsel

Posts: 153
Joined: 9/22/2007
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I find different people hit very differently with different toys... I don't mean to complicate the situation but it's true. My Very Dear Friend who can beat the bejesus out of me with a steel ruler and make me beg for more? Nobody else can do that, and he hits HARD! Some men are amazing with just the hand, some with a paddle.
You need the BF's input, and to try different things. The toy that hurts for the first 4 swats becomes joyous after that...
Nobody mentioned the classic hairbrush! Easy to get, innocuous when left out, and oh so effective. And there's a surprising difference between them.
Floggers, whips, canes- this isn't spanking. It's a full court press scene and requires education in the use of the toys. Canes and singletails aren't beginner stuff- the boyfriend needs to really learn what he's doing there.

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RE: spanking help - 12/3/2007 10:00:35 AM

gorgeous1

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Buy the Book the "Compleat Spanker" by Greene, I believe is the name. GREAT advice on OTK spanking and other fantastic positions.

My personal favorites to spanked with are wooden hairbrushes, riding crops, straps, and of course, a hand.

The most important advice I can give is for your boyfriend to learn how to warm up. If I'm going to get a good long spanking, we start slow... a furred paddle, then progressively more stingy, or thuddy. I have noticed that depending on my hormone level and where I am in my monthly cycle can sometimes make me more sensitive to stingy stuff like a crop. Also, alternating between sting and thud can help you stretch out a session

A really "threatening" looking instrument is a large kangaroo flogger. It is great because it can be used in all sorts of manners. If your boyfriend practices, he can learn how to wrap some of the tails just right where you get a little stingy "ouchie" in one spot, but the rest is a nice thud, and there's nothing more wonderful than smelling that lovely kangaroo hide when it's gently stroking your face or throat. I had one custom made as a gift for him. He has big hands and I was able to have one made that's perfect for him!

If you are not interested in going out and sharing your "kink" with other people, the best way to learn how to strike safely and properly is to have learning sessions. My hubby took a washable marker and drew an outline of the safe strike zones on my body and practiced. I was able to give him constant feedback on what I liked and where and how much I could take and with what.

It takes practice, and patience to learn, but it is very rewarding!

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RE: spanking help - 12/5/2007 6:24:35 AM

CaneIacMaster

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Try this site for assorted spanking toys. www.cane-iac.com

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RE: spanking help - 2/3/2008 9:01:51 PM

LunaticDesign

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here's how I test my toys. I hit the inside of my fore arm repeatedly with increasing force. I then do the same thing to my inner thigh. This will give you a really good idea on how something will feel.

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