Play or scence ????????

Play or scence ???????? (Full Version)

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HardnRuff -> Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 5:30:00 PM)
so the next time we get together to play..." "our next scene, slut, will include..." How is a submissive to think about each encounter with a Dom? it has always interested me how each Dom speaks of these focussed times. But it's not only the Dom that will call it play....submissives do too! A wise Dom once said to me that He is very careful to call a scene a scene. That there are elements of playfulness in all areas of life but that BDSM is not based on 'play' and therefore should not be spoken of as such. To me...a scene is just that... a setting....a place and a time and a series of tools that allow the Dom to teach and mold the submissive into her best self....each scene building on the ones before and slowly expanding limits and restrictions until B/both can look back and marvel at how far they have come. Play, on the other hand, is juvenile and trite, says He. a cheapening of that which is intense, intentional, and intended to bring T/two closer together. What is the thoughts of the reader? Is that too serious a thought? Is it a matter of 'who cares so long as you enjoy it'? Or is ther another view that can shed further light onto the 'play' vs. 'scene' discussion?

Rumtiger -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 5:30:55 PM)
who gives a shit? just have fun.

laurell3 -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 5:34:13 PM)
Semantics are only as important as you allow them to be. Words are not as meaningful as actions. I think it really is a matter of who cares as long as you enjoy and it is consentual.

DarkDaddyZ -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 5:37:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: laurell3 Semantics are only as important as you allow them to be. Words are not as meaningful as actions. I think it really is a matter of who cares as long as you enjoy and it is consentual. Yeah, what she said!

breatheasone -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 6:02:29 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HardnRuff so the next time we get together to play..." "our next scene, slut, will include..." How is a submissive to think about each encounter with a Dom? it has always interested me how each Dom speaks of these focussed times. But it's not only the Dom that will call it play....submissives do too! A wise Dom once said to me that He is very careful to call a scene a scene. That there are elements of playfulness in all areas of life but that BDSM is not based on 'play' and therefore should not be spoken of as such. To me...a scene is just that... a setting....a place and a time and a series of tools that allow the Dom to teach and mold the submissive into her best self....each scene building on the ones before and slowly expanding limits and restrictions until B/both can look back and marvel at how far they have come. Play, on the other hand, is juvenile and trite, says He. a cheapening of that which is intense, intentional, and intended to bring T/two closer together. What is the thoughts of the reader? Is that too serious a thought? Is it a matter of 'who cares so long as you enjoy it'? Or is ther another view that can shed further light onto the 'play' vs. 'scene' discussion? Call it play...call it macaroni..... call it jungle fucking....as long as the "D" type and "s" type are cool with it who cares?

Maya2001 -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 6:44:22 PM)
It depends on the opinions of the people involved, I am a novice sub with my former dom in which no long term commitment was intended he was quite okay with using the word play and with me using, my current dom in which we are approaching as a possible long term commitment does get upset if I use the word play, and will ask me if I think of this as just a game eg viewing as a casual playmate rather than as a committed relationship, so to him the semantics is important.

OldBastardly1 -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 6:59:54 PM)
I prefer "play". I don't want to take things too seriously. If it quits being fun, why would I continue? Btw, I am in a 24/7, collared relationship with my sub. We live BDSM. We enjoy the fun part alot. I will actually laugh during play, <shudders>.

AquaticSub -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 7:10:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HardnRuff A wise Dom once said to me that He is very careful to call a scene a scene. That there are elements of playfulness in all areas of life but that BDSM is not based on 'play' and therefore should not be spoken of as such. Why not? I usually use both terms. The scene is the period of time and play is what we do. quote: Play, on the other hand, is juvenile and trite, says He. a cheapening of that which is intense, intentional, and intended to bring T/two closer together. That's nice. He isn't the all-knowing master of BDSM though. Scenes aren't always bringing two people closer together. That's like saying sex is only for married people. Sometimes I don't know what else you would call our scenes other than play. We laugh and crack jokes between swats and tease each other. It's fun. We play and rejoice in our playing and our ability to arouse and amuse each other. quote: What is the thoughts of the reader? Is that too serious a thought? Is it a matter of 'who cares so long as you enjoy it'? Or is ther another view that can shed further light onto the 'play' vs. 'scene' discussion? I think it's fine as a personal way of doing things. But I do think it's pompous to speak in "one way" terms. His way isn't an exceptional way, it isn't a perfect way or the only way. It's only, just and merely a way. As such I really don't know how wise your "wise dom" was.

SirJohnMandevill -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 7:22:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HardnRuff What is the thoughts of the reader? Is that too serious a thought? Is it a matter of 'who cares so long as you enjoy it'? Or is ther another view that can shed further light onto the 'play' vs. 'scene' discussion? Sounds like semantics to me. And yeah...I don't care what we call it as long as my submissive and I enjoy what we're doing. Les (Purveyor of Fine, Handcrafted Kink)

Jasmyn -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 7:39:53 PM)
Have always called scenes' 'play' and vice versa ... when I 'play' with someone I am 'scening' with them...when I am 'scening' with someone I am 'playing' with them. Does one not play sports? Should we tell every sports person out there they can no longer call what they do 'play' because it is not a game they are playing? But a serious pursuit of the physical? Seriously .. the uber dom needs to lighten up.

smilezz -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 7:45:16 PM)
If people would get rid of all the "being politically correct" bullshit they would probably find out how much FUN they could have. Who gives a rats ass.......PLAY.......SCENE.......HAVE FUN........ENJOY LIFE! ~smilezz~

bipolarber -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 7:55:21 PM)
I like to call our get togethers "doing the hot horizontal epilectic love monkey dance." You should try it... no one can figure out if it's theatrical, playful, trite, or just plain weird!

Darke -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 8:36:07 PM)
"Angels fly because they take themselves lightly." Just as BDSM encompasses both the long-time married couple who rent a hotel room twice a year, AND the much-vaunted self-professed "total no-limit-TPE-slave" who brags about how she has just a bucket and laptop in her cage, BDSM includes Both those who treasure the connected, joyous inhibition of sex AND the sincere gravitas of old-school, high-protocol dinners. Its so diverse it even includes people who enjoy both those things in varying degrees at varying times. That being said, I think it needs to be explicitly stated that the term-of-art "play" in the lifestyle has long been understood to mean basically a "physical interaction between two players, sometimes but not necc. sexual", and doesn't neccesarily mean light-harted gallivanting. I point this out because a similar confusion is a personal pet peeve of mine--Ambiguity over the word "theory", as in "theory of evolution." Theory means something quite specific in scientific argot, something far more rigorous than it downs in everyday parlance. Much of the "debate" over whether we should stop teaching science and lose our country's competive edge stems from this common confusion. Same word, different languages, effectively.

Jasmyn -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 8:54:01 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Darke That being said, I think it needs to be explicitly stated that the term-of-art "play" in the lifestyle has long been understood to mean basically a "physical interaction between two players, sometimes but not necc. sexual", and doesn't neccesarily mean light-harted gallivanting. Nicely stated Darke

Kumasan2 -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 9:17:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OldBastardly1 I prefer "play". I don't want to take things too seriously. If it quits being fun, why would I continue? Btw, I am in a 24/7, collared relationship with my sub. We live BDSM. We enjoy the fun part alot. I will actually laugh during play, <shudders>. What he said. I wanna have a fun and great time. I use the terms interchangeably but tend to usually refer to it as play. And I'm a curmudgeon, too, so I must be doing something right to be playful!

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 9:48:24 PM)
A scene for me is a special focused time set aside for kinky stuff, sometimes "playing." Play is much more casual, freeform, spontaneous. Juvenile and trite? So that's why I go to bed with a silly grin on my face so often- we're just juvenile and trite all the time. Must also think that laughing in a scene is a cardinal sin. http://www.collarchat.com/m_272262/mpage_3/key_scene/tm.htm#272876 WHy is it called a scene? http://www.collarchat.com/m_1389159/mpage_1/key_scene/tm.htm#1389173 Help with understanding "scening"

adoracat -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 10:26:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: OldBastardly1 I prefer "play". I don't want to take things too seriously. If it quits being fun, why would I continue? Btw, I am in a 24/7, collared relationship with my sub. We live BDSM. We enjoy the fun part alot. I will actually laugh during play, <shudders>. Daddy enjoys making me laugh during playtime..then moan the next moment. kitten, smiling

ItalianSMistress -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/6/2007 10:34:24 PM)
I really dont care what anyone calls it, I call it play, only because that is how I veiw it, that I am playing with a toy, the slave. The rest of the time that I am not playing with the slave, its just life, within our roles.

Jayxkes -> RE: Play or scence ???????? (12/7/2007 12:45:41 AM)
I use them interchangably, though play tends to be more general. So we play at a fet club, when pervy friends visit we play. That play may include a kidnap scene. Just about everyone I know uses those terms and no-one worries about play being anything negative, simply because it's called that. There are times when one word just doesn't fit...'are you going to scene at Nemesis?' , 'I'm planning a kidnap paly for your next visit'.... they just don't sound right do they. Bottom line for me is not to worry about it, as long as me and mine understand each other!

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