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What part of "No, thank you!" was in any way unclear?


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What part of "No, thank you!" was in any way ... - 12/8/2007 4:03:39 PM   
indygirl2


Posts: 23
Joined: 5/19/2005
Status: offline 		I have a standard, polite "no thanks" email I send to boys who approach me that I'm not interested in.  I don't generally elaborate on the reason(s), just simply state that we're not a good match, and wish them luck. 

About sixty percent either never respond to that (which is fine) or send a quick "thanks for letting me know" message.  The majority of the rest will send an immediate "but, why?" reply.  I usually ignore those, not wanting to be unnecessarily unkind, but will occasionally respond if it's a distance issue or some such.  Those exchanges typically go no further.

But then there are the remaining few.  Every couple of days, like clockwork, I get one of these:
* Are you SURE?
* But WHY?????
* I could take as many swats as you could give me!  [That one's verbatim.  If I'm not even interested in emailing you, why on earth would you think I want to play with you?]
* PLEASE?????

I know that to some extent, I share the blame for this silliness, because of my personal "no blocking except in cases of verbal abuse" policy.  But really?  What on earth is the point?  I can't imagine there are any dominant ladies whose opinion would be favorably changed by this behavior, and mine sure as hell isn't.

WTF?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 4:21:51 PM   
LaMistressa


Posts: 460
Joined: 12/4/2006
Status: offline 		This has happened to me before, and although it annoys the living bejesus out of me, I usually write it off as the old "they want something so much their common sense has left them" syndrome. I still usually block them, but I try not to get upset over it.

But yes, it is very annoying.

(in reply to indygirl2)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 4:24:05 PM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline 		Unfortunately this is why many have started not responding at all.  That may seem rude, but getting in an argument about rejection isn't fun or productive.  There's quite a few threads here on this and you will find it's very common.  You may need to rethink your block button policy eventually.


_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to LaMistressa)
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RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 5:34:52 PM   
DianeB269


Posts: 1596
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline 		I would say 90% of them do not understand what "No, thank you" or "I'm not interested in you" means...



Diane

< Message edited by DianeB269 -- 12/8/2007 5:38:47 PM >

(in reply to indygirl2)
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RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 8:22:15 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		In my opinion, they're just doing anything to try and get (or keep) your attention. Simply ignore them.

Master Fire


_____________________________

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(in reply to indygirl2)
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RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 8:34:21 PM   
kc692


Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline 		I had a conversation with a respected domina of these boards the other day, and in the discussion, she was telling me about some boys that she had answered very politely, telling them why she was not interested, or what they could do to help themselves.  I told her she was too nice, since two of the boys in question had repeatedly spammed me with mail the minute I signed on and offered to show me their cam.  She had had numerous emails with one of them, as you are all saying, but why not this, why not that, and she actually took the time to answer them each time.  No offense to the ones that do this, but that is why I have a simple directive in my profile to weed the ones out that don't read the profiles....no matter how hot they are, male or female, if they do not follow my directives, or if they are not just sending me an email about the boards, or something just friendly and not seeking, I DO NOT answer.  Much easier that way, but just my opinion.

_____________________________

Anyone can overpower; not many can INSPIRE.....

This is only MY opinion. If it's not yours, let's agree in advance to agree to disagree, OR, you can just get the fuck over what I had to say:)

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
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RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 9:00:16 PM   
CollegeConundrum


Posts: 322
Joined: 5/18/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: indygirl2

I have a standard, polite "no thanks" email I send to boys who approach me that I'm not interested in.  I don't generally elaborate on the reason(s), just simply state that we're not a good match, and wish them luck. 



Are you sure?????


(in reply to indygirl2)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 9:00:53 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		Indeed, I own up to being Rude Domme right in my profile. I have no issue with hitting the delete key.  Though thank goodness, my extra cranky profile and assurances of no sex keeps most of the wankers away these days!

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[page 23 girl]



(in reply to kc692)
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RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 9:53:33 PM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline
quote:


Isn't that sad?
(Yes!)
Don't we just hate that?
(Yes!)
Don't we wish they would just DIE?
(YES!)


(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 10:01:09 PM   
LadyLegs


Posts: 176
Status: offline 		I look at my email in much the same way I do the forums, if I don't see something that inspires me to post a reply, I don't. 

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 10:38:39 PM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline 		Thus my giving up on responding at all to those who don't please me with the first email.  It's not worth the time or effort.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to indygirl2)
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RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 10:43:34 PM   
MissMagnolia


Posts: 3636
Status: offline 		Alas yes, all of the above. Though I make very full use of the block button. I have no intention of arguing the point.

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Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.


(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 11:13:10 PM   
indygirl2


Posts: 23
Joined: 5/19/2005
Status: offline 		Thank you for all the replies - so glad to see I'm not the only one who gets this jackassery.  (Didn't really think I was, of course, but it's always nice to confirm.)  One of these days, I'm sure I'll get mercenary enough to just stop replying to the "no thank you" boys altogether.

An unexpected side benefit of starting this thread:  a boatload of new but strangely familiar entries in my "Who's Viewing Me?" list.  It took me clicking on three or four to make the connection - I recognize your main profile pics from hours of lurking on this board. 

(in reply to MissMagnolia)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 11:15:08 PM   
indygirl2


Posts: 23
Joined: 5/19/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CollegeConundrum

quote:

ORIGINAL: indygirl2

I have a standard, polite "no thanks" email I send to boys who approach me that I'm not interested in.  I don't generally elaborate on the reason(s), just simply state that we're not a good match, and wish them luck. 



Are you sure?????




LOL!  Yep, pretty sure.  But thanks for asking!  Hee.

(in reply to CollegeConundrum)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/8/2007 11:17:20 PM   
MissMagnolia


Posts: 3636
Status: offline 		CC, behave or you're going over my knee for an ass whoopin!!

_____________________________

if at first you dont succeed..then skydiving isnt for you

Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.


(in reply to indygirl2)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/9/2007 1:52:20 AM   
CliarSiofra


Posts: 34
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: ask
Status: offline 		Yes totally a nuisance and many i don't reply to.

How ever i think there is a part of me that finds it cathartic to tell them how stupid they are for asking when its obvious they haven't read the profile..


and I agree the NO sex seems to weed out the one who do read it.

(in reply to MissMagnolia)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/9/2007 3:08:10 AM   
MissMorrigan


Posts: 2309
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		Generally, I haven't had a problem with people. My profile states clearly that I am not seeking further relationships or play partners and should I receive an email from someone that typically starts, "Read your profile, you're beautiful, do read mine and if I am what you are looking for contact me!" I point out that if they had read my profile they would know all the information they need to and why I will not be contacting them further. Most are very polite, admit they hadn't read the profile and just selected profiles based on the main profile picture and wish me well. Occasionally I'll get what I consider 'the desperate plea' from someone who wouldn't respect a person's decision no matter how clear/firm they are with their reply, I make no excuse or apology for automatically deleting without having replied to them.

(in reply to indygirl2)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/9/2007 4:05:43 AM   
MysticFireTopaz


Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
Status: offline 		I have come to the conclusion that some do this because they don't handle rejection well, or because they won't take no for an answer.
 
At one point, I did send a polite no thank you response to every reply I received.  The communication usually did stop at this pont, but I also got several responses that were hateful beyond beleif, as well as several who jumped into "super salesman" mode, trying to "overcome my objections." 
 
Now I lay out the parameters of what I am looking for pretty clearly in my profile, as well as what information I expect to see in the introductory letter.  I forewarn people in my profile that I will only respond to qualified individuals who include the requested information in their response.  If they don't, I generally won't bother getting back with them.  
 
Lady Topaz

(in reply to indygirl2)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/9/2007 8:43:04 AM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		As Miss Manners has pointed out repeatedly in the mundane world, any reply when one is not interested risks sending the message that further communication is a possibility because once you reply it can be interpreted as opening the door to further communication

So you reply to say "no" you are opening up the door for anyone who is clueless either intentionally or for lack of social skills.

Not replying is NOT being rude. It is being a bit old fashioned perhaps but then not everything from the past needs to be discarded I think.

< Message edited by thetammyjo -- 12/9/2007 8:45:01 AM >

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Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to indygirl2)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What part of "No, thank you!" was in any ... - 12/9/2007 9:11:09 AM   
AMADF


Posts: 66
Joined: 7/15/2007
Status: offline 		I also e tons of this bullshit. On my ad i put in BIG letters: not looking fo 24-7, not into cyber and only will play with boys in my own city but i oftenly get this messages: i have a webcam, im looking for total ownership, im in th other side of the world, etc.

I simply copy and paste this line "READ peoples profile BEFORE contact them" I dont think this is rude , since i took the time to explain who i am and what m lookuing for and this idiots just write without even reading (eventhough, be prepared, i have get answers like "i know mam just wanted to see if you wanted to do an exception" I just ignore this stupid people (usually men, never happend to me with a woman).


(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 20
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