Parent's Stash

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gorgeous1 -> Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 10:22:31 AM)
OK, so my thread on "What to do if you unexpectedly died" is now making me think about past "accidental findings" while I was growing up. I will share a few funny things with you guys. I found a pair of tighty whiteys that had hearts and devils on them and a BIG HOLE cut out of the front that was obviously done by scissors. And a matching bow-tie. My brother and I found a bottle of "Emotion Lotion" that "gets hot when you blow on it!" and we couldn't figure out why it had a "great strawberry flavor" so we tried some on our hands and YES, it DID get hot when we blew on it, and it did have a pleasant strawberry flavor. My hubby found the "Joy of Sex" in his parent's closet along with a mysterious bag of ropes. Perhaps that explains why he said "Way to go son!" when he was helping us move and hubby had forgotten to remove the roped that were tied to the legs of the bed frame. He also found a jar of Chocolate body paint in the fridge and his mom tried to argue that it could be used in an ice cream sundae! All I can say is EEEEEEEwwwwww! Makes me want to do the bug dance! I was made via immaculate conception! [8D]

ctrlaltdelete -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 10:25:31 AM)
My dad still insists that the only way to properly wear a knobbed/spiked condom is inside out.

FRSguy -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 10:34:31 AM)
When I was about fourteen I found five or six vibrators, naked pictures of my mom and dad going at it years before I was born, a bag of pot, about a million porn mags (thank goodness for internet I would hate to have porn all over the place...lol) but nothing really really kinky... all generic stuff...lol. For some reason it didnt freak me out at all. The worst discovery of my stuff that I have had was that my step son got into his moms closet and when I walked in he screached 'Wow, you guys are into bondage!" and he was burried in variouse ropes, straps and metal hardware. I freaked. He thought it was the coolest. Now he is in his 20's and we keep all of our stuff under lock and key not because we think they would freak but because we think they would use it...lol

ctrlaltdelete -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 10:37:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: FRSguy When I was about fourteen I found....a bag of pot.... Talk about finding their stash!

FRSguy -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 10:39:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ctrlaltdelete quote: ORIGINAL: FRSguy When I was about fourteen I found....a bag of pot.... Talk about finding their stash! The sick part is I didnt even smoke it!

gorgeous1 -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 10:42:33 AM)
Oh man, FRS, that sucks! Kids can be so damn nosey! We are at the point where we are trying to figure out where to store our stash. My oldest son is not the nosey type. There are drawers in this house that he's never even looked into, but the youngest is a little explorer, and we have to get a plan together. Both are waaaay too young to know or understand what our stash is all about, but one can never be too cautious. We keep it all hidden out of sight obviously, but we are thinking of purchasing a large locking trunk or something. Anybody have some ideas or tips for keeping curious kittens out of the basket of yarn?

FRSguy -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 10:59:08 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: gorgeous1 Oh man, FRS, that sucks! Kids can be so damn nosey! We are at the point where we are trying to figure out where to store our stash. My oldest son is not the nosey type. There are drawers in this house that he's never even looked into, but the youngest is a little explorer, and we have to get a plan together. Both are waaaay too young to know or understand what our stash is all about, but one can never be too cautious. We keep it all hidden out of sight obviously, but we are thinking of purchasing a large locking trunk or something. Anybody have some ideas or tips for keeping curious kittens out of the basket of yarn? One of those cedar mooney quilt chests that go at the foot of your bed with a lock on it. Its allways accesible because its at the foot of the bed and you can actually put blankets on top of your stuff and plenty of room to make an organiser for it. All prim and proper looking. You could call it an adult hope chest because you hope your Sir will unlock it every night.

FRSguy -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:02:31 AM)
Oh I also use a butler tray. Sounds stupid but what I do is take the tray out and fill it with the things that I plan on using then I tuck it under the bed that way its all ready to go when we are ready. Cuts down on prep time and the tray is large enough to put all the looser items on as well as candles, oils and such. Another thing I use is tool boxes, each box is set up for a different type of play like an ass wrecker,suspention bondage gear and a smaller one for the nip clips and vibes and such. They all lock using the same key and I move the items I want from the small boxes to the tray.

mhawk -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:07:07 AM)
sounds like the old theory of catching one of your parents naked not something anyone wants to see

subrdn8 -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:11:08 AM)
Every generation invented sex.

MistressPav -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:21:05 AM)
Gods, I will never forget the night I heard my parents' bed rythmically sqeaking in the middle of the night. I must have been about 12 or 13. I got sick to my stomach thinking that they were doing the naked "Huck-a-Buck". ********************************************************************** My Dad called a meeting in the livingroom one afternoon so me and my two older brothers attended wondering WTF was up. Well, come to find out, ONE of us three kids had been snagging rubbers out of my Dad's underwear drawer and he was none too happy about it. He never did figure out which one of my brothers were taking the condoms, but it certainly was an embarrassing situation for them. So we all got the "big speech", however my Dad's eyes never left my two brothers' faces. I just sat there listening to my Dad with this smirk on my sweet face. Heh.....teach THEM not to cross little sister.

MistressPav -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:23:27 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ctrlaltdelete My dad still insists that the only way to properly wear a knobbed/spiked condom is inside out. What a Dad, eh? So you're a chip off the old block? Way to go!!!!![:D]

ghitaPVH -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:29:23 AM)
Im lucky enough to have never once cought my parents doing anything more naughty than a very occasional peck on the cheek. I never found anything in any of their drawers (and trust me I went through them regularly) nor did I ever find anything unapprpriate in their vehicles, offices, or on their bookshelves. My parents never once made a sound in their room other than some loud snoring. I was adopted and an therefore luckily able to allw myself to live in relitive peace knowing they have never had sex. my oldest on the other hand will be permenantly scared for life...because at the age of three he knocked on my bedroom door to politly ask "mommy, why are you going ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh?"

ctrlaltdelete -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:34:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MistressPav What a Dad, eh? So you're a chip off the old block? Assuming that they didn't always wear condoms - I sure hope so! He is 72 now and was bitching to me last month that my mom had cut him off and that it had been 4 days since he got any. Yeahh, dad!

laurell3 -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:37:19 AM)
I found my uncle's "stash" once, he convinced me it was paprika (I was young) and I threw it away. He flipped out, and I got upset and gave him more paprika (the real stuff). It's humorous now to remember his reaction to this little kid handing him paprika, it really wasn't then as I had zero comprehension where I went wrong. I shudder to think of my parent's having sex. However, I have overhead my mother being spanked in her bedroom before. I moved by bedroom to another room after that.

WickedBDSM -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:41:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: FRSguy Oh I also use a butler tray. Sounds stupid but what I do is take the tray out and fill it with the things that I plan on using then I tuck it under the bed that way its all ready to go when we are ready. Cuts down on prep time and the tray is large enough to put all the looser items on as well as candles, oils and such. Another thing I use is tool boxes, each box is set up for a different type of play like an ass wrecker,suspention bondage gear and a smaller one for the nip clips and vibes and such. They all lock using the same key and I move the items I want from the small boxes to the tray. WOW, I just have to say, I am impressed with your organization skills. Bravo!

FRSguy -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:47:02 AM)
It kind of surprises me how many of our parents hinted at a kinky existance.

laurell3 -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:51:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: FRSguy It kind of surprises me how many of our parents hinted at a kinky existance. What's humorous is my mother knows my sister has some lifestyle tendencies and criticizes her for it (to me not my sister). I've never had the heart to say oh yeah remember when.....and ugh talking to my mother about her sex life is just YUCK!

KyttynTheMynx -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 11:51:51 AM)
Ugh. Where do I begin? Mom was a nudist most of my life, so I rarely had friends over. Ick. Mom and Dad used to have this HUGE stash of porn in their closet, and various lubes dildos, and vibes, and oils in moms dresser. A few video tapes were in the family tape holder. Various nude photos of mom hidden on top of a kitchen cabinet. HER lingerie in the trunk of MY car that I found 2 days ago (she hasnt owned that car since her and dad divorced and she signed it over to me). At the age of 16, on my birthday, I woke up thinkin we all over slept, ran to their room, and was scarred.[image]http://www.collarchat.com/image/s8.gif[/image] A year later, mom and our neighbors wife were in our living room watching porn while they made me stay in my room. I was listening to them giggle like teens while watching it. I found the same porn I dunno, weeks later. BORING! New Years eve, that same year, spent some time at my best friends house, did a lil drinking, and we watched Debbie Does Dallas, and some cheesy western porn that was in her Dad's stash) Fast forward to two weeks ago, went to moms house to pick her dog up, and she asks if I want a "peter worm" (vibrator). I play all innocent, and say no. She throws one at me, but lo and behold, its a vibrating penis shaped lighter. BEST GIFT EVER! No one ever steals it!!!

SingleRarity -> RE: Parent's Stash (12/12/2007 12:32:09 PM)
When I was six, my older sister and I watched my mother give birth to my little sister on our livingroom sofa-bed. We joke now that because she had my older sister when she felt she was still too young, it was our mother's way of teaching us not to be in a hurry to have kids, but that it worked too well as neither of us have had children yet :P Anyway, after that, there wasn't really anything my parents could do to shock me. -A

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