RE: asking Respected MistressYes

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iammachine -> RE: asking Respected MistressYes (12/18/2007 2:39:41 AM)
quote: s it that the world has become so bad that we think of cheaters only and not of honest people,of people who fail to keep their words and not of genuine people any more Anyone that believes that their faith in humanity will bring nothing but flowers and sunshine from others is simply naive. The unfortunate truth of the matter, is that there are dishonest people in the world. As such, trust is not something that is unconditionally given equally to everyone - it is something that must be earned. It has nothing to do with being a novice or not, and certainly nothing to do with a corporate fiasco of a holiday. It has everything to do with the fact that talk is cheap, actions speak a lot louder than words and it takes more than five seconds to assess someone's character.

rugenuine -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/18/2007 3:28:32 PM)
Respected MisPandora thanks for Your comments but the problem is She hasnt opened my last six males although there was rather an encouraging last mail from Her stating that She would like me to implement certain things in my daily life as Her on-line sub.But She didnt elaborate further and i was waiting for Her next mail, but alas!though She is visiting the CM site , She hasnt opened a single mail from me and thinking She would like to see my devotion and seriousness i continued to write as many as six mails within the last two weeks but no response.Earlier She had even sent her pic too following my pic mailed to Her. can You please advise what should i do please? With regards rugenuine

rugenuine -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/18/2007 3:31:05 PM)
thanks for Your comments but the problem is She hasnt opened my last six males although there was rather an encouraging last mail from Her stating that She would like me to implement certain things in my daily life as Her on-line sub.But She didnt elaborate further and i was waiting for Her next mail, but alas!though She is visiting the CM site , She hasnt opened a single mail from me and thinking She would like to see my devotion and seriousness i continued to write as many as six mails within the last two weeks but no response.Earlier She had even sent her pic too following my pic mailed to Her. can You please advise what should i do please? With regards rugenuine

BitaTruble -> RE: asking Respected MistressYes (12/18/2007 3:43:12 PM)
rugenuine, Your Mistress has a note in her journal that she was ill with the flu. That was 13 days ago. It may be that she is inundated with emails and just hasn't gotten to yours yet. I'd give her a little more time. It is the holidays and she has been ill. Hopefully, she won't hold your OP against you because if I were out sick and just hadn't had a chance to get to all my mail yet, it would rather piss me off to have my name put out on the forums as a whine/rant/complaint which makes me look bad. Did you even read her journal entry about her illness? Do you know how much time she has to devote to reading email on Collarme with holidays just around the corner and a real life in NY? Have you actually ever even met her in real life? Somethings for you to think about. Good luck, Celeste

pixelslave -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/18/2007 3:53:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rugenuine Respected MisPandora thanks for Your comments but the problem is She hasnt opened my last six males although there was rather an encouraging last mail from Her stating that She would like me to implement certain things in my daily life as Her on-line sub.But She didnt elaborate further and i was waiting for Her next mail, but alas!though She is visiting the CM site , She hasnt opened a single mail from me and thinking She would like to see my devotion and seriousness i continued to write as many as six mails within the last two weeks but no response.Earlier She had even sent her pic too following my pic mailed to Her. can You please advise what should i do please? With regards rugenuine Not to be rude, but does someone need to hit you over the head with a load of bricks?? Until a person responds to your most recent email, you normally don't send them 5 more. Perhaps you might wait a week or two and then send another one inquiring whether they received your last one as they do get lost in the system here on occasion (okay, sometimes frequently when the system is acting up because the subs haven't been feeding it properly). [X(] The real point is, if someone is genuinely interested in you, they don't ignore your messages to them. Chances are that by now your messages are being blocked by the woman in question. It's time to forget about her and move on! At the very best, for a short period of time, she was amusing herself by toying with you. [image]http://www.collarchat.com/micons/m23.gif[/image] Chasing (a.k.a harrassing) a woman with countless emails like you describe is a really big turn-off and quite annoying to all of the women I've personally corresponded with here on CM (I'm sure there's an exception hiding someplace in the crowd). It tells them you have no self-respect or self-esteem and clearly can't get the *very loud message* they're sending you that they're *not interested* by not replying to your emails! [&:] Sorry to be so blunt, but it appears you weren't getting the message the woman was trying to send in her own manner. Many here and elsewhere just can't or won't come out and say they're no longer interested or that they've found another who seems more suitable, etc. [8\|] - pixel Collared to Majik

PsyVamp -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/18/2007 6:30:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: pixelslave Not to be rude, but does someone need to hit you over the head with a load of bricks?? Until a person responds to your most recent email, you normally don't send them 5 more. Perhaps you might wait a week or two and then send another one inquiring whether they received your last one as they do get lost in the system here on occasion (okay, sometimes frequently when the system is acting up because the subs haven't been feeding it properly). [X(] The real point is, if someone is genuinely interested in you, they don't ignore your messages to them. Chances are that by now your messages are being blocked by the woman in question. It's time to forget about her and move on! At the very best, for a short period of time, she was amusing herself by toying with you. [image]http://www.collarchat.com/micons/m23.gif[/image] Chasing (a.k.a harrassing) a woman with countless emails like you describe is a really big turn-off and quite annoying to all of the women I've personally corresponded with here on CM (I'm sure there's an exception hiding someplace in the crowd). It tells them you have no self-respect or self-esteem and clearly can't get the *very loud message* they're sending you that they're *not interested* by not replying to your emails! [&:] Sorry to be so blunt, but it appears you weren't getting the message the woman was trying to send in her own manner. Many here and elsewhere just can't or won't come out and say they're no longer interested or that they've found another who seems more suitable, etc. [8\|] - pixel Collared to Majik pixel, You usually give sound advice and this time is no exception. OP, There are times when I will not bother to open an email, and then the person sends another, and another, and another... sighs I don't bother blocking people usually but I will delete the emails unread. Then there are times where my life intrudes and I have no time for emails. Yes, I may be "on" collarme, but I may be here on the boards and not near the other side. Sometimes I have even left the site up (horrors) while I go do something else. Because of distance and time and real life, I often use IM or email to have a potential sub do a few written tasks, this is to see if they can follow direction. If the task is simple and straightforward and they do not comply but expect to speak to me - I do not bother to answer. If someone cannot handle the simple task of sending an email, say of a hard limit list (and there is nothing prohibiting them from doing such) how am I to trust them to listen to me in real life? Celeste asked a pointed question, did you read her profile, her journal and see that she was ill? If I am ill, the last thing I need is someone stalking me on line; and believe me, that many emails feels like you are being stalked if they aren't encouraged. Lady Jag.. (Psy)

dreamysubmale -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/18/2007 6:49:10 PM)
I think it is important to be you and be genuine (IMHO). Don’t try to pass yourself as something you are not. Be patient and attentive. When you are true to yourself, the people you will want will find themselves attracted to you. Make every effort to be the person others would want to be around, like be honest, positive respectful etc and be open to other possibilities…do not count out those who you don’t see as potentials. Even thought this site is a BDSM site, I found (in my experience) that both dom/mes sub/slaves seek also friendships. And I’ve been lucky to have made those which I come to treasure and let them know that my home is open if at any time they wish to visit and that courtesy also been extended to me even though we are oceans apart.

pixelslave -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/19/2007 7:26:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: dreamysubmale I think it is important to be you and be genuine (IMHO). Don’t try to pass yourself as something you are not. Be patient and attentive. When you are true to yourself, the people you will want will find themselves attracted to you. Make every effort to be the person others would want to be around, like be honest, positive respectful etc and be open to other possibilities…do not count out those who you don’t see as potentials. Even thought this site is a BDSM site, I found (in my experience) that both dom/mes sub/slaves seek also friendships. And I’ve been lucky to have made those which I come to treasure and let them know that my home is open if at any time they wish to visit and that courtesy also been extended to me even though we are oceans apart. Oh I totally agree! I've made countless friends here on CM that I hope to meet at some point in time; with several whom I regularly correspond with on the other side! They're great friends to have. When I came to CM, I was initially drawn here by the great discussions on the boards. The many friends I've made have been a wonderful side benefit which I wasn't expecting and am oh so very greatful for. They've been a wonderful addition to my life that I probably wouldn't know what to do without. [sm=lol.gif] - pixel Collared to Majik

pixelslave -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/19/2007 7:46:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: PsyVamp pixel, You usually give sound advice and this time is no exception. OP, There are times when I will not bother to open an email, and then the person sends another, and another, and another... sighs I don't bother blocking people usually but I will delete the emails unread. Then there are times where my life intrudes and I have no time for emails. Yes, I may be "on" collarme, but I may be here on the boards and not near the other side. Sometimes I have even left the site up (horrors) while I go do something else. Thank you for the compliment Lady Jag. BTW, lovely photo you've posted too! [8D] It's always nice to see a real photo associated with a screen name instead of an avatar. [:D] Many of my friends know that I frequently drop in read a few messages on the forums and perhaps post a reply to one or two while I'm at it along with reading their message on the other side. They also know I won't likely reply to their message until I have the time to compose the kind of response it merits. Like you, I do have another life away from the forums too, and there will be times when I don't get here at all or only for a few minutes. My friends understand that. Strangers should too! [&:] One would logically think that anyone contacting another for the first time here would recognize they're not likely to get an instant response. I guess testosterone too often allows the little head to do the thinking for the big one; either that or to prevent any thinking at all. [;)] - pixel Collared to Majik

RedMagic1 -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/19/2007 8:58:21 AM)
I met a woman on-line a few months ago. She's an MD with the US Army, though I didn't know that then. She had just had a guy tell her he was a pilot, and she asked him a question about how to land a plane. Turns out he was totally BSing her. As luck would have it, I was the next guy who IMed her, and when I mentioned what I do, she threw a gazillion questions about the human body my way. I took my last biology class in 1988, and was completely out of my league. However, she decided I was for real anyway, because I was completely honest about my ignorance and didn't try to "look good." We are now Platonic friends, but that was one of the strangest conversations I have ever had in my life. But on the other side of things: WARNING WARNING WARNING Asking a lot of sexually-directed questions is a common scammer tactic to get a handle on you. Every single woman I have met from online to real was more interested in my everyday vanilla interests. If the line of questioning is "Do you like giving oral service? What's your favorite position?" instead of, say, "Who are you going to vote for in the next presidential election?" then the "woman" writing to you probably lives in Zamboanga or Nigeria. Someone who is interested in you will ask you questions about you, not just your sexuality.

Stephann -> RE: asking Respected MistressYes (12/19/2007 9:54:28 AM)
Dude, Unrealistic expectations usually result in distrust and distancing. You live in India. If you're writing or soliciting a potential relationship with someone outside of your own country, you have a strong liklihood of being dismissed as too far. I do say this with some caveats; I recently returned to the US after living in Santiago, Chile for three years. When I wrote people in the US while living in Santiago, I made it clear that I was a US citizen and intending to return to the US within the coming couple of months. Unless you're in a position to relocate on your own in the very near future, what possible use do you think a potential owner would have for you, living 17,000 kilometers away? Regards, Stephan

dreamysubmale -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/19/2007 5:43:15 PM)
Oh I totally agree! I've made countless friends here on CM that I hope to meet at some point in time; with several whom I regularly correspond with on the other side! They're great friends to have. When I came to CM, I was initially drawn here by the great discussions on the boards. The many friends I've made have been a wonderful side benefit which I wasn't expecting and am oh so very greatful for. They've been a wonderful addition to my life that I probably wouldn't know what to do without Hello pixeslave, its not my intention to highjack the thread, but can you please explain the “other side”? I seen it mentioned often. I also notice in some posts the “Edited by so and so for whatever reason” Is that put there for fun by the poster or is it something they add on afterwards to correct their post? Think much, speak little, and write less. — Italian proverb The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them; that's the essence of inhumanity. — George Bernard Shaw

pixelslave -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/19/2007 7:14:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: dreamysubmale quote: ORIGINAL: pixelslave Oh I totally agree! I've made countless friends here on CM that I hope to meet at some point in time; with several whom I regularly correspond with on the other side! They're great friends to have. When I came to CM, I was initially drawn here by the great discussions on the boards. The many friends I've made have been a wonderful side benefit which I wasn't expecting and am oh so very greatful for. They've been a wonderful addition to my life that I probably wouldn't know what to do without. Hello pixeslave, its not my intention to highjack the thread, but can you please explain the “other side”? I seen it mentioned often. I also notice in some posts the “Edited by so and so for whatever reason” Is that put there for fun by the poster or is it something they add on afterwards to correct their post? No problem with the sidetrack/hijack. I'm sure others will benefit from the explanation as well. [:)] The message boards here at "collarchat.com" are separate from "collarme.com" where one can see member's profiles and send private messages to them by clicking on the "Read Mail" tab. Some refer to that as "email", but it's actually CM's own messaging system for those who have profiles on "that side" of CM, thus the reason it's referred to as "the other side". When sending a private message on collarme.com, you're not actually sending email. For example, you don't have an email address here for "dreamysubmale at collarme.com", instead an internal message similar to what you send here on the boards is being sent to another member. So rather than confuse as to whether or not one has sent an actual email to another, members often refer to "the other side" to help distinguish between the two. As an aside and not to confuse, but one doesn't actually need to have a profile on collarme.com in order to post messages on the boards here on collarchat.com. There are some who do that in order to avoid the barrage of posts to them "on the other side" which are received regardless of what they put in their profile. It does however limit their contact with other members to only public messages on the boards. As to the "< Message edited by pixelslave -- 12/19/2007 1:00:09 AM >" question, which you'll often see at the bottom of a message; one has about 10 minutes or so to click on an "*edit"* icon which appears in the upper right-hand corner of their message after they've pressed the "ok" or "submit post" buttons, to begin to make any corrections theu feel are necessary or might have overlooked when composing it. When a message is edited like that, a tag is added to the end of their post. Some members will add a note above it (at the actual bottom of their post before pressing the submit button) stating why they edited their post; such as for spelling or grammar, or to remove references to the OP being a jerk. [;)] Whether or not to add such an explanation line is entirely a personal decision. I hope this answers your questions clearly or at least lessens your confusion a bit more than if you were submerged in a pile of mud. [:D] - pixel Collared to Majik

dreamysubmale -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/20/2007 3:17:13 PM)
I hope this answers your questions clearly or at least lessens your confusion a bit more than if you were submerged in a pile of mud. [:D] It did indeed pixelslave. Thank you for your patient and excellent explanation. I will no longer think of the “other side” as some kind of spooky place where the spirits linger [:D] Our best successes often come after our greatest disappointments If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow. — Chinese proverb

pixelslave -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/20/2007 5:48:07 PM)
I'm glad I could help and hope the explanation was helpful to others as well. That said, one never knows what sort of spooky kindred spirits they might find lingering on "the other side"! [;)] - pixel Collared to Majik

MisPandora -> RE: asking Respected MisPandora (12/20/2007 6:24:45 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rugenuine Respected MisPandora thanks for Your comments but the problem is She hasnt opened my last six males although there was rather an encouraging last mail from Her stating that She would like me to implement certain things in my daily life as Her on-line sub.But She didnt elaborate further and i was waiting for Her next mail, but alas!though She is visiting the CM site , She hasnt opened a single mail from me and thinking She would like to see my devotion and seriousness i continued to write as many as six mails within the last two weeks but no response.Earlier She had even sent her pic too following my pic mailed to Her. can You please advise what should i do please? With regards rugenuine Settle down, that's what. Stop being pushy. Stop OBSESSING! Stop posting the drama publicly. Recognize that not answering mails isn't the end of the world. Perhaps there is a collarme problem. Perhaps she's just not interested. Regardless, life goes on. For petes sake, don't lose your mind. And I'm sorry to be smart with this final comment, but if you were a valued, vital asset in her life, you'd at least have her personal email, phone number, etc.

mons -> RE: asking Respected Mistress Yes (12/21/2007 4:14:29 AM)
greetings i see you have wonder why we dommes do not just take anyone who says he is a slave and is willing to do anything for us. well one thing i have been ask time and again is oh i will do anything i will even suck on another man. this is not what i ask for. i have one man who wrote me wonderful letters and as i got to know him he became strange, when i decide not to take him (thank god he live in another state) he threaten me with harm and cutting me. i have a inner part that sense danger i felt it and i never give him any information about myself. do not feel bad we all are very caunties until we know someone very well . it takes time and do not jump into it so fast. i wish you luck in you search. mons

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