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New Mistress - 8/17/2005 4:03:35 PM

AnuSakine

Posts: 1
Joined: 8/17/2005
Status: offline

I have always had a dominant core to me but have never explored it...until I started dating my boyfriend who is a complete sub. A few days ago I asked him how far he wanted to go with this b/c I feel that from everything that I have learned that I will/must become a female-dom. He suprised me and told me that he wanted to be my slave but didn't want to freak me out. Needless to say I owe it to him to be a good mistress so I am looking for someone to train me in being the best mistress I can be. I can rent out his services for payment of your kind gesture

also if any one has any suggestions let me know;do's and dont's and such

Thanx, AnuSakine

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RE: New Mistress - 8/17/2005 4:18:20 PM

Cykotica

Posts: 20
Joined: 6/1/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AnuSakine

I have always had a dominant core to me but have never explored it...until I started dating my boyfriend who is a complete sub. A few days ago I asked him how far he wanted to go with this b/c I feel that from everything that I have learned that I will/must become a female-dom. He suprised me and told me that he wanted to be my slave but didn't want to freak me out. Needless to say I owe it to him to be a good mistress so I am looking for someone to train me in being the best mistress I can be. I can rent out his services for payment of your kind gesture

also if any one has any suggestions let me know;do's and dont's and such

Thanx, AnuSakine

That is pretty much how I started out as well. I began dating a submissive male, and well, the rest became history. We're still together 5 1/2 years later. My best advice to you is to read as much as you can get your hands on, and while you're digesting that, take it all with a grain of salt. My gut instincts have always guided me well. You know yourself better than anyone. If you would like to talk, feel free to send me a mail.

_____________________________

-C

(in reply to AnuSakine)

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RE: New Mistress - 8/17/2005 9:40:38 PM

MistressGrace07

Posts: 100
Joined: 7/29/2005
From: Chicago
Status: offline

I agree.... reading is Your number one friend right now. Join some local groups if you can and find a Domme/Mistress mentor (I had one and it was AMAZING) who is willing to spend time and show you the rules of the road.

(in reply to Cykotica)

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RE: New Mistress - 8/18/2005 4:25:35 AM

MsWhip

Posts: 17
Joined: 7/22/2005
Status: offline

Having a mentor can help, watching other couples can help. Get out to socials, this is a link to some organizations in Arizona.

Desert Dominion

_____________________________

*If you have no sense of humour, you probably have no sense at all.

http://www.collarme.com/bdsm/v/148138/details.htm

(in reply to AnuSakine)

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RE: New Mistress - 8/18/2005 6:32:23 AM

DrkAngl

Posts: 145
Joined: 4/9/2005
Status: offline

Google.com can be a searchers best friend. :) I know I use it a lot.
This board is an amazing source of knowledge as well.

There are plenty of books out there as well. One that a friend of mine raved about was "Screw the roses, send me the thorns"

I'm in a simular boat, but without the boyfriend. I'm still very much a novice, but right now keeping up with my Autistic son keeps me from going further into things. In the future I would love to be trained to be a good Domme. Perhaps sometime I shall.

BDSM Safety
http://www.google.com/search?num=100&hl=en&lr=&safe=off&q=BDSM%2Bsafety

BDSM etiquette
http://www.google.com/search?q=BDSM%2Betiquette&svnum=100&hl=en&lr=&safe=off&sa=N&tab=iw

BDSM Novice
http://www.google.com/search?num=100&hl=en&lr=&safe=off&q=BDSM%2Bnovice

BDSM how to
http://www.google.com/search?num=100&hl=en&lr=&safe=off&q=BDSM%2Bhow+to

BDSM Books
http://www.google.com/search?num=100&hl=en&lr=&safe=off&q=BDSM%2Bbooks

< Message edited by DrkAngl -- 8/18/2005 6:35:22 AM >

(in reply to MsWhip)

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RE: New Mistress - 8/18/2005 8:26:19 AM

Nuke718

Posts: 240
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline

I can't agree enough with the advice above! Read articles online. Read the books available.

Go to local events and talk to real life Doms and subs. Watch them in social situations and if possible in play.

I want to add a don't as well. Don't watch a lot of Femdom porn. Its skiewed to male fantasy and not an accurate reflection of most RL Ds relationships.

Nuke }:-

Forgot to add, filter what y ou lear thru what you and your submissive enjoy.

< Message edited by Nuke718 -- 8/18/2005 12:16:30 PM >

(in reply to DrkAngl)

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RE: New Mistress - 8/18/2005 9:57:49 AM

Rubyb

Posts: 73
Joined: 6/27/2005
From: California
Status: offline

Congratulations on your decision to become his mistress/domme!

While your reading, remember that communication is key.

What do you like?
What does he like?
There are some really great checklists out on the web that can spark conversation and help you plan play sessions, etc.

Here's an example of a checklist that lets you differentiate between fantasy and reality play, what type of experience you both might have had, and lets you rate how much you like a particular activity. You each fill it out and compare answers.

http://www.vampirespet.com/ActivityChecklist.html

Having a sub is a big responsiblity, yet with your desire to succeed and do your homework, you'll do a fine job. To your success!

_____________________________

Ruby Bloodstone
Author and fan of erotic vampire fiction.
Lifemate and pet to T, Nathaniel's Miss

Ruby's portfolio at writing.com:
http://Writing.Com/authors/rubyb

(in reply to AnuSakine)

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RE: New Mistress - 8/18/2005 1:24:51 PM

GoddessDustyGold

Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline

I am in your area. I will be happy to speak with you and I have sent you a note on the other side.
Welcome to collarme and the boards!

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom

(in reply to AnuSakine)

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RE: New Mistress - 8/19/2005 9:52:38 PM

kc692

Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline

To the OP, Dusty is a wealth of information, you would do well to speak with her!! There are others on this board also, and it has been my experience that those Dominas are wonderful fonts of information, viewpoints, and experiences. If you see posts from some that you admire, email them. From my experience when I joined not so long ago, they are very helpful when asked. Welcome to collarme and the boards.

(in reply to GoddessDustyGold)

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