RE: .appriciatingnonaveragequalities. (Full Version)

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juliaoceania -> RE: .appriciatingnonaveragequalities. (12/27/2007 11:06:56 AM)

quote:

disagree with julia - I do believe that in the context of 'average' masochists aren't 'average' because they do contain a distinctive quality - otherwise they wouldn;t be a subsection or 'culture'


Perhaps there is a culture of masochists, I do not belong to it... I think many people are masochistic, they just do not know it, can't embrace it, or are afraid of what the word means.

I just know what I am, if that makes me distinctive in some way, well in the minds of some it may, in my own mind, not so much... You are free to disagree with my interpretation of my own personal experiences.

I have a distaste of the word average I suppose, nothing personal




RCdc -> RE: .appriciatingnonaveragequalities. (12/27/2007 2:38:06 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

quote:

disagree with julia - I do believe that in the context of 'average' masochists aren't 'average' because they do contain a distinctive quality - otherwise they wouldn;t be a subsection or 'culture'


Perhaps there is a culture of masochists, I do not belong to it... I think many people are masochistic, they just do not know it, can't embrace it, or are afraid of what the word means.

I just know what I am, if that makes me distinctive in some way, well in the minds of some it may, in my own mind, not so much... You are free to disagree with my interpretation of my own personal experiences.

I have a distaste of the word average I suppose, nothing personal



I do agree that there are people who are masochists(although I don't believe the word 'many' suits) who haven't - as it were - put a name to what they feel or desire and therefore can't embrace it/know it etc.  Which is one reason why I did focus on the group.
 
I use the word 'culture' losely.  It's said that BDSM is a subculture.  I don't think you have to feel like you belong to it, it just sets loose identity.  Just because I am submissive, doesn't mean I identify with other submissives, but its still a sub-division - female as a sex is a division or 'culture'.  I think I liked kyras analagy when she said she looked at it as venn diagrams, that kinda rocked.  Like I said, it's kinda lose.
 
I believe everything we do makes people all distinctive in some way.  Like I said, I don't believe in an 'average' anything, apart from maybe in math.  Like I said, it worked with the phrase but exchange it with 'ordinary', or 'insertwordyoupreferehere' if it makes you feel more comfortable.  Everyone has something that makes them special - I was just interested in those who embraced them in this context.
 
And julia, I am one of the people who realises you never do anything on a personal level, so is all good.
 
the.dark.




Prinsexx -> RE: .appriciatingnonaveragequalities. (12/27/2007 3:09:48 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: InkedMaster

..He just couldn't land worth a shit...

yes it is difficult to come down I agree......




Mercnbeth -> RE: .appriciatingnonaveragequalities. (12/27/2007 3:30:40 PM)

this slave used to LOATHE her masochism for two reasons:
 
#1: it was always an issue for the folks she was intimate with(what the heck is wrong with you, you really need to see a shrink about that, you sick-o, sort of thing)
#2: enjoying or tolerating pain above a certain level can be dangerous to one's health.  (remembering ol' Evil, RIP)
 
when this slave met Master, she encountered one who absolutely adores her masochistic ways and other than the joy she receives of His sadistic exploitation of her to His full advantage, it makes this slave grateful that she has this, as you so eloquently put it nonaveragequality.
[:)]




PanthersMom -> RE: .appriciatingnonaveragequalities. (12/27/2007 3:53:53 PM)

it could simply be nothing more than sensory integration disorder.  people with this problem feel sensations differently than the average person.  something that you or i would feel as soft and silky can grate on their nerves.  seams on clothing we would barely notice are a constant source of irritation.  pain doesn't feel the same to them.  i have a hubby and son with these problems.  the behavior is different in people like this, the risks are not perceived the same so they take things to a higher level.  kenivel just was pretty brazen with it.  he's gone now, so there's no chance to answer the theory with fact, but it could explain alot.

PM




KindLadyGrey -> RE: .appriciatingnonaveragequalities. (12/27/2007 3:55:12 PM)

After two decades of conscious masochism, I have come to the conclusion that indeed, the way my brain works is fundamentally different. While I do appreciate masochism in a bdsm context, for me it really doesn't matter what the context of the pain is: it translates simultaneously in my brain as BOTH pain and pleasure. Not in my psyche, not as some transmuted endorphin rush, but as actual, neurochemical pleasure. If the pain is intense enough, I can get delirious, like after an orgasm. Damned if I can explain it, but it definitely isn't normal.

I tend to like it for the same reason Evil Knevil did. I'm not really strong(yet!), but being able to take a beating (not bdsm related) and keep getting up with a smile makes me much more of a badass in a fight, even if I ultimately lose because I punch like a girl.

It took me many many years to stop fighting what that meant. Enlightened pacifism seems to be the in thing for pagan/poly circles, and it really does make a lot of sense most of the time. . .

But I love fighting. I never did manage to identify with the archetype of earth mother like many of my girlfriends; I've always been drawn to the warrior path. Most of the time it's just friendly fights in a safe place like a martial arts studio or wrestling with friends, but I certainly don't run from a fight, and it's not unusual for me to walk around with bruised ribs or minor abrasions or the like. It makes me HAPPY, just like doing dangerous and ridiculous stunts made Evil Kneevil happy. It isn't about power exchange like in bdsm, it's about what makes you feel ALIVE.

Masochism is just a strange quirk that allows people like us to get away with that kind of behavior at a lower cost than most people would pay. There's still plenty to fear(permanent damage, loss of life), but pain is no longer on that list. There are plenty of ways to conquer pain, but some of us are born never having to, which is pretty cool in my book.




PsyVamp -> RE: .appriciatingnonaveragequalities. (12/27/2007 5:24:36 PM)

To give half an answer, in my own opinion I am below average as a masochist.   I say this in respect to those who can deal with broken bones and burns and the like. 
I like a little pain, but it is more like seasoning on a meal.  I have a higher pain tolerance than "average" people, that is to say people that are not masochists, but amongst the like minded, while not a lightweight, I cannot hold a candle to the "painsluts".

And to Prinsexx, my inappropriate education between 10 and 12 did not make me submissive to men, but I'm not sure that it had anything to do with making me dominant either. 

Lady Jag




slavegirljoy -> RE: .appriciatingnonaveragequalities. (1/2/2008 2:56:31 PM)

First of all, i think that the "average" person is very much under-appreciated for just how much pain he/she can and does tolerate.  The "average" person tolerates a lot more than he/she gets credit for.  There are news reports, pretty much daily, about "regular" people enduring harsh conditions, painful injuries, and other serious difficulties.  Winter storms have recently knocked-out power to thousands of homes for days and the people in those homes have had to survive sub-freezing temperatures, with no heat, other than what they could get through piling on layers of clothes and huddling together.  They couldn't cook any food and couldn't go anywhere because the roads were impassable.  They have tolerated it and gotten through it. 
 "Average" people endure the painful injuries caused by terrible accidents and acts of nature and hunger and many other tragic and horrible events. "Average" women tolerate menstrual pain, sometimes severe, every month, for much of their adult lives.  And, "average" women tolerate the, often difficult, pain of childbirth. Manual laborers, dock workers, farmers, and other "average" people tolerate pain from their jobs for decades, often ending up with chronic pain.  It seems to me that "average" people are tough and that when times get tougher so do they. Second, from what i have read and heard, Evel Knievel, seems to have been pretty much "average" in his ability to tolerate pain.  He received a lot of injuries but, he also received medical care for those injuries and i never heard of him refusing pain medication for his injuries.  It wasn't like he walked away from a crash, with broken bones and said, "No thanks, I don't need any pain medicine or medical help."   In a May 2006 news article, it was said that "The man who survived 300 perilous motorcycle jumps and once climbed into a rocket-powered cycle to fly over a canyon, now stays close to an oxygen tank, ingests 50 pills a day and sucks on lollipops that deliver fentanyl, a heavy-duty painkiller."  A USA Today article from Jan. 2007 stated, "Former daredevil Evel Knievel, who spends his days hooked to an oxygen tank and a morphine pump" and, "He has a new liver and a replacement hip, and most recently doctors inserted a drug pump in his abdomen. It gives little reprieve from the excruciating pain in a fused spine" It seems to me that what made Knievel different from the "average" person wasn't his ability to tolerate pain more but, his willingness to seek out and engage in activities that he knew were likely to cause him painful injury.  Of course, that willingness was motivated by the desire to draw a crowd who would pay money to see him do amazing and risky stunts.  Just like professional athletes are motivated to risk suffering serious injury and play through the pain, in order to get a win, not let their team down, keep the fans happy and, keep their job. As a masochist, what makes me different from the "average" person isn't that i don't feel pain the same way they do or that i tolerate it any better than they do.  What makes me different is that i get a pleasurable response from feeling a very certain type of pain, delivered in a very deliberate manner, under a very specific circumstance, which is sexual in nature.   Just like most any "average" person, when i slam my finger in the car door it's very painful to me and not pleasurable, at all, and i will do whatever i  can to get rid of that pain as soon as i can.  But, kinky pain is a very different kind of pain for me and i don't tolerate it.  i enjoy it. So, no, i don't feel that i am 'special' or have some magical ability to tolerate pain.  i tolerate pain when i need to, just like most "average" people do and i'm relieved when it's over, just like most "average" people do. slave joyOwned property of Master David
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

quote:

What hurts the average person doesnt hurt me -

So my question is - do masochists appriciate and embrace that they aren't 'average'. And if not, why not?(For the object of this question - 'average' is defined as something without or lacking special distinction, quality or ability.)  I have posed it to masochists in general and particular, as it related to Kinevals statement, but anyone can of course answer from their POV.

 
the.dark.




missturbation -> RE: .appriciatingnonaveragequalities. (1/2/2008 3:05:54 PM)

To me i am average / normal.
To others i am a bit of a freak.
So i guess it all depends on your personal defintion of average.
I do embrace and accept that my pain tolerance levels and feelings i obtain from pain are probably not average, the norm.




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