Bi or just curious (Full Version)

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SilentButSexy -> Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 1:35:14 AM)

So I have wondered about this. I have never actually been with a female. I have thought about it, but I have never really acted on it. The closest experience I had was when two of my bi friends tied me to my bed and used one of my toys on me (It was a birthday present) However there was not really anything sexual that happened between me and my girls. So now im not real sure where I stand with the whole "Bi" thing. What is a girl to do. I think I should know what my status is if im choosing to be submissive to a male, or even a female.



MistressSadie69 -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 1:38:33 AM)

One way to find out. Get drunk and go for it!



eyesopened -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 1:50:38 AM)

A lot of people might think being tied to a bed and having toys used on them to be "sexual."

Adults tend to know their sexualityby the time they become adults.  Being heterosexual, gay/lsebian or bi-sexual is not a conscious choice nor is it just arousal. ( i doubt a set of genitals can distinguish a male or female tongue. ) What happens mentally and emotionally? 

i am straight. period. strictly-dickly.  If Master told me to lick a pussy i would do it because i'm obedient and because He wanted me to do it.  For me it would be a chore not unlike cleaning the oven or emptying the cat's litter box, not something i enjoy but something that would need to be done.




julietsierra -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 2:13:01 AM)

One of the interesting things that exists within a lot of the swing communities is the differentiation that exists regarding this very subject. When filling out all their profiles for their sites, the have subheadings under "bi."

bi
bi-curious
socially bi

I suppose, since this is bdsm, we could add "obediently bi" to the mix as well.

I rather like the term "socially bi." It about sums up things for me. I can be with a woman. There have been some that I've felt very close to. However, ultimately, if left to my own devices, I'd never venture down that road - not because I'm afraid to or something like that, but simply because to me, the focus is always the man.

I don't equate being with a woman to be on par with cleaning the oven (although I understand what was being said). When we are with other women, I genuinely like those women. Doing things with them isn't drudgery. In fact, I enjoy myself very much. However, no matter how good a time I'm having, there is always the thought in my head that he's watching, he's participating, and what can I do to make this even more enjoyable - for HIM.

So, I guess I like "socially bi."

juliet



SilentButSexy -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 2:27:06 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

One of the interesting things that exists within a lot of the swing communities is the differentiation that exists regarding this very subject. When filling out all their profiles for their sites, the have subheadings under "bi."

bi
bi-curious
socially bi

I suppose, since this is bdsm, we could add "obediently bi" to the mix as well.

I rather like the term "socially bi." It about sums up things for me. I can be with a woman. There have been some that I've felt very close to. However, ultimately, if left to my own devices, I'd never venture down that road - not because I'm afraid to or something like that, but simply because to me, the focus is always the man.

I don't equate being with a woman to be on par with cleaning the oven (although I understand what was being said). When we are with other women, I genuinely like those women. Doing things with them isn't drudgery. In fact, I enjoy myself very much. However, no matter how good a time I'm having, there is always the thought in my head that he's watching, he's participating, and what can I do to make this even more enjoyable - for HIM.

So, I guess I like "socially bi."

juliet


You know... socially bi sounds like what I think im feeling. Thanks so much... Its really helping me make sense of things.



eyesopened -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 2:49:06 AM)

i guess i would wonder why anyone would worry about it and just let it happen if it's gonna happen.  It's a guy's fantasy of course but i pity the poor woman who has sex with me.  Can you imagine what it would feel like to have sex with someone who is disgusted with the whole thing and can barely wait for it to be over...that you are being used strictly as a "fluffer" for my Master?  my first "bi" experience was exactly that... i was there as a "second" and the slave was so obvious about how disgusted she was with me, the act, and that she was somehow being punished by her Master.  i never ever ever want to experience that again ever! 

Just be careful that everyone is on the same page, everyone is going to have enjoyment.  People have feelings.



HizBabyGirl -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 3:39:13 AM)

[sm=ugh.gif][sm=ugh.gif]I feel much the same as you do. Sadly, it seems that my viewpoint, however, is oftentimes seen as narrow-minded or judgmental, when in fact its just my choice and the way I am. I know, beyond any doubt, I would not enjoy such an adventure and I'm not even sure I could do it if my master ordered me to do so. I hope my master would know I would find it distasteful and never command me to do that for if he is a good person there would be nothing involved in that but a useless demonstration of power and a good master surely would not need to demonstrate his power in such a meaningless event.

I have had people say that I just don't want to accept my feelings and say that everyone is curious about this kind of thing but I know myself quite well and I would have to say that no, it is not for me. I think some people are driven to experiment in an effort to appear open and therefore more positive. Each to his own but not for me.



wisteriaV -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 5:30:38 AM)

First time sexual experiences can be sucky, wonderful or something inbetween. It sounds like your first so called bi experience was sucky. Might I suggest to get some more experience under you belt and then determine your bi-sexuality. From personal experience my first bi contact was lousy and I thought eww nasty no way, however over time and a few positive bi experiences, I discovered that bi is beautiful.



SlavesSoul -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 6:14:07 AM)

  I list myself as straight, though am very selectively Bi.

    I usually prefer men, but I have had a long term relationship with a woman in the past, and occasionally I will meet a woman that just truly flips my switches.

  I list as straight because most of the men (Doms) who contacted me when I listed as bi drove me nuts! They either had a girl who was curious and wanted me to break her in, or they seemed to think that I would be willing to have sex with any woman they brought home.

   I was very tierd of explaining that it was no different than being straight, I wasn't interested in sex with every man on the planet, just cause he has a dick...and the same goes for the ladies, and their parts! I dion't know why they don't get that...but they just don't.

k



littlebitxxx -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 6:18:32 AM)

My becoming bisexual was discussed long before it happened.  Ex-Master asked if I would be open to the experience.  He set up a wonderful evening with a couple friends of his and my initiation was so comfortable and natural.  I thoroughly enjoyed my first woman.  Nervous?  Hell Yes!  Wondering about my reaction to being face-to-face so to speak with my first pussy.  Then I was concerned about technique...would she like it?  Could I do it right?  But Lady T was so warm and friendly, Crazy M was just crazy and it broke the ice, ex-Master was there and loving it all....it just happened.  Actually, the best thing I was told was to think of the kind of loving I liked and do that, then take it from there.

I, too, would consider myself socially-bi.  I don't necessarily go looking for a woman but wouldn't turn one away for eating crackers in bed.  Pussy is nice for a change but I still prefer cock.



sambamanslilgirl -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 6:21:35 AM)

seriously, only you can answer this query yourself since you're the only one who knows you.

i have listed myself as straight since i know i'm not remotely bi, bi-curious or even on the edge of curiosity of being with another woman. though i did at one time get persistent bi-switches sending me messages who thought i should be bi.



TethersEnd -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 7:05:28 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SilentButSexy

So I have wondered about this. I have never actually been with a female. I have thought about it, but I have never really acted on it. The closest experience I had was when two of my bi friends tied me to my bed and used one of my toys on me (It was a birthday present) However there was not really anything sexual that happened between me and my girls. So now im not real sure where I stand with the whole "Bi" thing. What is a girl to do. I think I should know what my status is if im choosing to be submissive to a male, or even a female.


You say your not real sure where you stand with the whole Bi thing, but your presence here says it's been on your mind!  My suggestion is not to push for a solid answer to where you stand, eventually you'll just know. 

Some food for thought.  
Are you attracted to women sexually? 
Could you choose to submit to a woman
in the same manner you could a male? 
I ask this due to my own perspective of Bi.  I am attracted to some woman, yet to submit to a woman
I'm not sure would ever work.  I see any Bi play as only play, where as submitting to a male feels
~normal~ to me.  I call myself Bi but dont know if others would consider me so. 




lusciouslips19 -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 7:09:48 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: julietsierra

One of the interesting things that exists within a lot of the swing communities is the differentiation that exists regarding this very subject. When filling out all their profiles for their sites, the have subheadings under "bi."

bi
bi-curious
socially bi

I suppose, since this is bdsm, we could add "obediently bi" to the mix as well.

I rather like the term "socially bi." It about sums up things for me. I can be with a woman. There have been some that I've felt very close to. However, ultimately, if left to my own devices, I'd never venture down that road - not because I'm afraid to or something like that, but simply because to me, the focus is always the man.

I don't equate being with a woman to be on par with cleaning the oven (although I understand what was being said). When we are with other women, I genuinely like those women. Doing things with them isn't drudgery. In fact, I enjoy myself very much. However, no matter how good a time I'm having, there is always the thought in my head that he's watching, he's participating, and what can I do to make this even more enjoyable - for HIM.

So, I guess I like "socially bi."

juliet


Thats describes me too. I love to play with a woman in the context of a 3some. But I am not interested in a relationship other than friendship with women. i love and adore men. Women...fun playthings for extra fun, If given the choice, manly, Manly men. YUM



DesFIP -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 7:38:30 AM)

I'm with eyesopened and HizBabyGirl. The idea of having sex with a female is a turn off. I have amazingly deep friendships with other women but physically, no way. If a situation came up that I could not get away from, it would be unpleasant for everyone, and it would destroy the relationship. Since it makes no sense to go through with something I dislike sufficiently to make it a deal breaker, I would end the relationship prior.

But he knows this, that I am straight and monogamous so it wouldn't be the all time fantasy of his dreams. I'd be sure to make it into a nightmare.



Sabella -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 7:42:03 AM)

A friend of mine described it best I think - and called it "Bi-sensual". Meaning you are sensually interested, but not driven to be with a woman. Has to be the right woman, right situation, right mood and it's all good.

I associate with this very strongly. I think all women are beautiful! I've never met a woman I couldn't find something I loved about her :)

SilentbutSexy don't worry about finding the exact right niche you fit in! It's apt to change over time anyhow. If you can explore that side of you in a loving environment with friends then you are fortunate, don't worry if it's not something you want all the time - does it matter really?



lusciouslips19 -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 9:49:25 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Sabella

A friend of mine described it best I think - and called it "Bi-sensual". Meaning you are sensually interested, but not driven to be with a woman. Has to be the right woman, right situation, right mood and it's all good.

I associate with this very strongly. I think all women are beautiful! I've never met a woman I couldn't find something I loved about her :)

SilentbutSexy don't worry about finding the exact right niche you fit in! It's apt to change over time anyhow. If you can explore that side of you in a loving environment with friends then you are fortunate, don't worry if it's not something you want all the time - does it matter really?



Now I have so many great titles I dont know which to use. I use to call myself Bi-curious even after I had been with a woman, becuase I dont fall for women. So now I heard Bi-social and that sounded GREAT! NOW you gave me Bi-sensual.
So now I am a B -sensual and bi-social girl!



DarkDaddyZ -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 1:23:43 PM)

Is anyone straight curious?????? I never understood the term bi curious but hey, that's just me [:)]



TwistedSin -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 1:28:55 PM)

Bisexuality is very different for everyone.  Some women crave emotional relationships with men, and purely sexual ones with women (This is me for the most part), Some women are vice-versa, some are equal and can fall in love with either one.

I knew early on that I was bisexual, I had my first girlfriend in the 7th grade.  Other women notice that they like looking at women but aren't really sure if they could handle being in an actual sexual situation with another woman. 

All I can tell you is give it a try!  The first time I had sex with a woman, I did freak out for a minute, but then it was amazing and I loved every minute of it.  If you don't like it, just stop and never do it again. 



MystressDream -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 2:04:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sabella

A friend of mine described it best I think - and called it "Bi-sensual". Meaning you are sensually interested, but not driven to be with a woman. Has to be the right woman, right situation, right mood and it's all good.

I associate with this very strongly. I think all women are beautiful! I've never met a woman I couldn't find something I loved about her :)

SilentbutSexy don't worry about finding the exact right niche you fit in! It's apt to change over time anyhow. If you can explore that side of you in a loving environment with friends then you are fortunate, don't worry if it's not something you want all the time - does it matter really?



I really like this "bi-sensual" label.  <grin>  I happen to be straight sexually.  My scene preference is with males... and, the relationship I seek is with a male.  I do, however, love to scene with women.  The female energy is wonderful.  When I do so, I love caressing them, scening with them, thoroughly enjoying when they quiver in sexual bliss.... However, I have no desire to have them touch me other than to cuddle afterwards.  I don't touch their genitals, don't have to to make them cum repeatedly....  My pleasure comes from watching their reactions.  However, it is not sexually exciting for me.  It is the energy exchange that gives me my pleasure.  Am I "bi-curious"?  No.  Do I enjoy bringing a woman to heights of sexual arousal and release and even into subspace?  Oh, yes!  Do I have any desire to have another woman touch me sexually?  No.  The idea of it does nothing for me.  The female play partners I have bring me a great deal of pleasure.  <smile>  It is very sexual for them... but, it just isn't that way for me.  They all know this about me... and accept it before we ever scene.  I have, however, become a challenge for one in particular.  <chuckle>  Thank God we are very close friends, and I am also a very good friend of her Master.  It all works.



eyesopened -> RE: Bi or just curious (12/26/2007 3:56:06 PM)

Exactly how many times does one need to try liverwurst before they know for certain that they hate it?



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