BlkTallFullfig
Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004 Status: offline
|
Something sent to me I thought was cute (I don't know who the author was); The following is an actual question given on a > University of Washington > > chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was > so "profound" that the > > professor shared it with colleagues, via the > Internet, which is, of > > course, > > why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as > well. Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off > heat) or endothermic > > (absorbs > > heat)? > > > > Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs > using Boyle's Law (gas > > cools when it expands and heats when it is > compressed) or some variant. > > One > > student, however, wrote the following: > > > > First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is > changing in time. So we > > need > > to know the rate at which souls are moving into > Hell and the rate at which > > > they are leaving. I think that we can safely > assume that once a soul gets > > to > > Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are > leaving. As for how many > > souls are entering Hell, let's look at the > different Religions that exist > > in > > the world today. Most of these religions state > that if you are not a > > member > > of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since > there is more than one of > > these religions and since people do not belong to > more than one religion, > > we > > can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth > and death rates as they > > are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to > increase exponentially. > > Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume > in Hell because Boyle's > > Law > > states that in order for the temperature and > pressure in Hell to stay the > > same, the volume of Hell has to expand > proportionately as souls are added. > > > > > This gives two possibilities: > > > > 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the > rate at which souls > > enter > > Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell > will increase until all > > Hell > > breaks loose. > > > > 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the > increase of souls in > > Hell, > > then the temperature and pressure will drop until > Hell freezes over. > > > > So which is it? > > > > If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa > during my Freshman year > > that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I > sleep with you, and take > > into > > account the fact that I slept with her last night, > then number 2 must be > > true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic > and has already frozen > > over. The corollary of this theory is that since > Hell has frozen over, it > > follows that it is not accepting any more souls > and is therefore, > > extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the > existence of a divine > > being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept > shouting "Oh my God." > > > > THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A
_____________________________
a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW ""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni
|