Suleiman
Posts: 1127
Joined: 9/9/2004 Status: offline
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That Damned Squeaky Toy. It started as a joke last year. My wife and I are gamers. We got involved in a Vampire LARP. We wanted to do something to toss the cookies of the other players. I was playing a vampire transvestite dominant, she was playing my ghoul servant. In-character, we were engaged in puppy play. Real simple stuff- sit, beg, roll over, that sort of thing. Of course, playing pretend in a PG-level setting gave us a hankering to take things further in private. Now she complains about the squeaky to I got as a prop. Whenever I squeak it at her, she gets excited. She also starts swearing at That Damned Squeaky Toy. It's involuntary - a pavlovian response. Of course, I do my part to mantain the conditioning. Just like how you can't train a puppy to do something without giving them their reward, I don't squeak the newspaper without doing something to make it worth her while. At this point, the look on her face is priceless. Then again, the look on our room-mate's faces is also priceless. One of the other basement trolls pulled me aside a while ago and asked, in private, "What the hell is up with that damned rubber newspaper you guys keep squeaking at three in the morning?!?"
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Think of my verbosity as a sort of litmus test for our relationship. I write in a manner identical to how I speak and how I think. If you can not cope with what I have written here, it is probably for the best if we go our separate ways.
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