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LD Play - 1/3/2008 9:53:54 PM   
MasterJames1020


Posts: 3
Joined: 12/24/2007
Status: offline 		Greetings everyone.  I am a new Master in the D/s, M/s lifestyle.  Have limited experience in BDSM.  2 years to be exact.  I'm currently in a long distance relationship with a sub female.   She is new to D/s and is just starting out.  Since I am still green and have not really done much play online or long distance what would be some good play scenes for a beginner submissive who is thousand of miles away? 


MasterJames1020 
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: LD Play - 1/4/2008 2:44:25 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline 		Hi and welcome to the Boards... :-)
 
Hmmm, probably the same way one has sex long distance - you get each other all hot and bothered knowing full well the grand finale will be a solo flight....  Many (incl me) would think that's too exasperating to contemplate and a better investment might be in the form of a plane ticket.
 
I've certainly reinforced rules and standards online while we're apart but I wouldn't bother (with the whole relationship) without regular r/t liasons.  So you first need to decide if you're solely about dabbling round the edges of virtual D/s or you have a greater goal to actually do this face to face.  If the latter, "LD Play" is gonna get real tiring REAL QUICK....
 
Focus.

(in reply to MasterJames1020)
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RE: LD Play - 1/4/2008 2:57:17 AM   
MsLadySue


Posts: 2254
Joined: 12/18/2004
Status: offline 		I agree with Focus50.

_____________________________

In order for you to insult me, I would first have to value your opinion.
I love it when someone insults me. That means I don't have to be nice anymore.

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RE: LD Play - 1/4/2008 4:25:09 AM   
HalloweenWhite


Posts: 1028
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterJames1020

Greetings everyone.  I am a new Master in the D/s, M/s lifestyle.  Have limited experience in BDSM.  2 years to be exact.  I'm currently in a long distance relationship with a sub female.   She is new to D/s and is just starting out.  Since I am still green and have not really done much play online or long distance what would be some good play scenes for a beginner submissive who is thousand of miles away? 


MasterJames1020 


Sincerity is the key here.Have you got such a strong bond that you -know- she will obey you?, because if Y/you haven't, if you aren't in the same room as the person you're playing with then how do you know that they are doing what you've told them to do?, why should they be bothered to obey? what difference does it make if they don't?

Im not into LD anymore-I wised up a long time ago, for some, thats all thats possible because of health issues for example, but if Y/you can be r/l Id say do it.

To answer you question though, try telling her that when she is online with you, she is to wear something that is your favourite colour, has she got a webcam? tell her to turn it on so you can see, if she isn't wearing what you told her too then she is to be punished-spank herself on cam maybe.

Good luck, this sounds like a challenge.

(in reply to MasterJames1020)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: LD Play - 1/4/2008 8:22:08 AM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline 		I don't do LD eaither unless there is a serious chance we will meet and attempt to move forward.  It's way to easy to "feed me a line" on-line and tell me what I want to hear.  But when it comes to meeting, that does not happen, so unless you have already meet first I would not waste my time with anything other then the basic D/s, until you meet first.

Mike


(in reply to HalloweenWhite)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: LD Play - 1/4/2008 4:12:55 PM   
Statepalace


Posts: 185
Joined: 9/20/2007
Status: offline 		Web cam is the very first thing you need. After that, creativity is required, but you can certainly play long distance.

My Dom is in Boston. Orlando is one of His sales territories and we do see each other in person about every three months, but in between we play weekly (or more) on cam.

A half hour ago I spending quality time with my Dom via web cam. I was in a bondage belt, vibe attached, ring gag in my mouth, and ankles clipped to the belt (I do yoga). Yes, you have to give verbal instructions instead of putting a toy in place yourself, but hey, it works for us. Cum, don't cum, change positions - just use your imagination. "Keep the camera on your face, I want to see your reaction" is His most often repeated instruction.

I built a bondage sawhorse (very easy and pretty inexpensive) and we've set the cam up so He can see me on it. Having Him count down how much longer I have left and wondering if I'm going to make it was intense. It left me covered in sweat and slightly floaty. One thing you want to remember, though, is that the distance makes aftercare important. Those minutes on the horse were very physically taking, and I had a little bit of what I've heard others call sub drop for a few days afterward. He was traveling with work, and so I had the "blues" for a weekend. Mainly because I wanted to touch and snuggle after and couldn't, so "alone and exhausted" replaced "happy and floaty" pretty quickly.


Other things you can do include weekly assignments, such as -

1. Go get gas wearing your locking fetish heels. Take pictures. Better yet, most cameras have video clip features.

2. Wear your thigh high boots out shopping. Take pictures in the dressing room.

3. Tie a karada around yourself (He sent me a PDF with instructions). Go run errands. Again with the pictures.


We play ALL the time, even though He is over 1,000 miles away. A phone call that has me excusing myself to the hallway so no one will see me blush, sleeping bound (very light bondage) in my cuffs, buying new toys and taking pictures. We make it a priority to connect with each other and make this (and us) a daily thing if possible. Sometimes it's not, but even if we slept in the same bed every night work and such would get in the way sometimes.

Don't think of "what can I do long distance", think "what do I want to do" and then adapt that to work long distance. While my Dom does not post on the boards, if you want to email me for further ideas I can ask Him to reply when He has time. I don't think He would mind ;)

Best of luck to you.

_____________________________

And if I cease to desire and remain still,
the empire will be at peace of its own accord

(in reply to MasterJames1020)
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RE: LD Play - 1/5/2008 6:39:33 AM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		The problem with a long distance scene is the tools in between you. Writing a scene out in instant messenger can create good masturbatory fodder but having to type can ruin one or both's enjoyment. Being on the phone is great except for knowing you can't order her to do things with both hands unless she has a handset. Webcams with mics are the best way to do a LD scene, otherwise you will probably find the best thing to do is give assignments with some kind of verifiable proof that it was completed.

_____________________________

'cause when i look down /i just miss all the good stuff / when i look up / i just trip over things

(in reply to Statepalace)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: LD Play - 1/5/2008 4:13:53 PM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		That should read ...unless she has a headset...
Sorry

_____________________________

'cause when i look down /i just miss all the good stuff / when i look up / i just trip over things

(in reply to Elorin)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: LD Play - 1/5/2008 8:45:08 PM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		So... why are you in this long distance relationship in the first place?

Is it because of what you get to do together... you know the hot kinky stuff?

or is it because of who the person is and how you admire that person?

If it's the first.... no matter how hot and creative the fun is in an LD... it will fade and you both will move on...

if it's the second... you going to want more than LD.... you will want to be together.....  A d wanting to be together is going to motivate alot of fun together and apart.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to MasterJames1020)
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RE: LD Play - 1/5/2008 9:00:52 PM   
MasterJames1020


Posts: 3
Joined: 12/24/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists

So... why are you in this long distance relationship in the first place?

Is it because of what you get to do together... you know the hot kinky stuff?

or is it because of who the person is and how you admire that person?

If it's the first.... no matter how hot and creative the fun is in an LD... it will fade and you both will move on...

if it's the second... you going to want more than LD.... you will want to be together.....  A d wanting to be together is going to motivate alot of fun together and apart.

We are in a long distance relationship because she works in another country 6 months out of the year.  We met in person before this long distance occured.  In a vanilla relationship at that time.  I admire, adore and love my sub and distance is no big deal to me or her.  I just wanted some play suggestions for a long distance situation since I have not played online with her.  It has always been in rt. 

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: LD Play - 1/6/2008 2:32:46 AM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterJames1020

It has always been in rt. 

That'd be one of those handy little tit-bits of information that would've worked well in your OP!   lol
 
Focus. 

(in reply to MasterJames1020)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: LD Play - 1/6/2008 5:40:35 AM   
antipode


Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline 		I must confess I have no understanding of this long distance virtual stuff. I have to have a sub right here, in the flesh, BDSM is intensity, and spending hours and hours on a PC and/or a phone, to me, is completely nonsensical, something for people completely unable to do R/T, for whatever reason. Without sound, smell, vision, touch, body language, facial expressions, what have you got? Nuttin'....

------

Trixie: That's right Ralph, Carlos is teaching us the mambo.
Ralph Kramden: Ohhhhhhh, Carlos is teaching you the mambo... that puts a different light on everything... when I first came in here, I didn't know what you were doing... now I know, Carlos is teaching you the mambo... that makes a world of difference... One of these days, one of these days... POW! RIGHT IN THE KISSER!

(in reply to MasterJames1020)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: LD Play - 1/6/2008 5:46:54 AM   
Elorin


Posts: 970
Joined: 8/22/2004
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		anitpode
With a good webcam and microphones or a telephone headset, you get back the sound, vision, body language and most of the facial expressions.

As for a reason for long distance online, how about 'she's already my sub and I'm not going to dump her just because she can't be here with me now.'

_____________________________

'cause when i look down /i just miss all the good stuff / when i look up / i just trip over things

(in reply to antipode)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: LD Play - 1/6/2008 8:17:40 AM   
SilentTigresss


Posts: 261
Joined: 1/18/2004
Status: offline 		Well, not sure if i am to be posting on this forum, but i would like to add my thoughts. i've done long distance, did one for 4 years. It gets old, even if you have a "bond". There is nothing like the real thing, and even though i work for a major airline the long distance was tough. i did the directions given to me while going out, shopping or whatever; what to wear, etc. But for me, as i speak my opinion here, it began to feel like i was doing the domination to myself. And for a disclaimer i will say to each their own and what works for you- well right on.  :)

(in reply to Elorin)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: LD Play - 1/26/2008 8:26:23 PM   
viewfromthetop


Posts: 34
Joined: 1/21/2008
Status: offline 		Bumping this out of curiosity, as a fellow LD player.

My own $0.02...My pet and I lived together for a while but are now long distance again. For the most part, we keep the dynamic going with little things - he gave me a list of the clothes he wears and I'll tell him what to wear on a given day, I have him working out and keeping track of how much, just little stuff like that. As far as sex is considered, we'll do it over the phone; I tell him what to do, he gets off on it, and I get off on him getting off. Fun for everyone =)

And of course, it does come down in large part to trust and sincerity. I have no way of KNOWING, for certain, that he does what he's told. I'm not there to actually witness it. But I trust him, and I know he can be obedient without me looking over his shoulder. We got a good thing going.

(in reply to SilentTigresss)
Profile   Post #: 15
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