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RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 10:37:30 AM   
meticulousgirl


Posts: 969
Joined: 2/20/2007
Status: offline 		finding someone else is not what i do, that should be up to the Dominant so that He can determine if she fits His interests and if she is compatible with Him.  that should not be up to the slave....if the girl becomes the Doms play toy wouldn't you think they should be compatible?

i do!

~meticulous~

(in reply to sakidorei)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 3:08:19 PM   
whipingherfeet


Posts: 202
Joined: 10/26/2006
Status: offline 		dont worry about it , just for get it

(in reply to heartsemerge)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 3:24:34 PM   
MistressNoName


Posts: 664
Joined: 10/26/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: heartsemerge

I seem to have a problem here. You see, everytime that I befriend a new girl, and I tell them and introduce them to my Master, it seems they stop talking to me and proceed to contact him. Now he doesn't ask them to do this, nor is it understood that is how it is suppose to be. I introduce them to him, as a *just* in case we find her interesting and we want to try and seduce her. However, this has happened two times already and I view it as disrespectful towards me. Not on his part, but on theirs. They just stop talking to me all together, and proceed with contacting him. It would be different if they still were talking and were friendly to me. Instead, they totally bypass me, and go straight to him.

Clearly I am bothered by this. So what should I do?



You know, I'm a little confused. Your profile reads like you are looking to explore your dominant side, so looking for subs to play with, yet, you introduce them to your master for what? So he can add them to the stable or so he can decide whether you can play with the girl??? I agree with merc& beth...talk to you master about your feelings. Obviously there is more to this than what you've written here and frankly, this is an internal matter between the two of you.

Best,

MNN

_____________________________

aka Ms Petal - Check Me out on the Web.

(in reply to heartsemerge)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 3:42:38 PM   
Honsoku


Posts: 422
Joined: 6/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: heartsemerge
I seem to have a problem here. You see, everytime that I befriend a new girl...


quote:


However, this has happened two times already and I view it as disrespectful towards me.


Twice does not a pattern make. Food for thought.

Honsoku

(in reply to heartsemerge)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 3:53:04 PM   
swtnsparkling


Posts: 1738
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		stop befriending other girls and introducing them to your master

are you 100% sure he does'nt incourage them in any way?

_____________________________

Never make anyone a priority who treats you as an option 2003

Walk in Peace
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better than a "Yes" uttered merely to please



(in reply to heartsemerge)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 4:03:15 PM   
MissMagnolia


Posts: 3636
Status: offline 		"everytime that I befriend a new girl, and I tell them and introduce them to my Master and Just in case we want to try and seduce her"?

So, in essense, you are acting as a pimp for yourself and your master, though he isn't asking you to do this. So it is YOUR doing. You deserve all you get.

_____________________________

if at first you dont succeed..then skydiving isnt for you

Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.


(in reply to swtnsparkling)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 4:19:48 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline 		In a vanilla 3some I have always tried to go through the woman. If I start out talking to the man, I make sure that I talk to the woman. I write off the couple if the man is doing all the talking and I never hear from the partner.

In a D's situation, I believe I am to contact the Master as a sign of repsect and ask his permission to have a friendship with the Sub and let him no that I will not harm her or disrespect them. If he gives his approval, they are still a couple and they are a package and their union should be honored. When dealing with them I always stay cognizant of this and make sure that they are stable and dont use me as a pawn to make the other jealous and make sure to give my time equally and that no one feels excluded.

< Message edited by lusciouslips19 -- 1/4/2008 4:21:12 PM >

(in reply to heartsemerge)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 4:51:40 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: heartsemerge

I seem to have a problem here. You see, everytime that I befriend a new girl, and I tell them and introduce them to my Master, it seems they stop talking to me and proceed to contact him. Now he doesn't ask them to do this, nor is it understood that is how it is suppose to be. I introduce them to him, as a *just* in case we find her interesting and we want to try and seduce her. However, this has happened two times already and I view it as disrespectful towards me. Not on his part, but on theirs. They just stop talking to me all together, and proceed with contacting him. It would be different if they still were talking and were friendly to me. Instead, they totally bypass me, and go straight to him.

Clearly I am bothered by this. So what should I do?



My suggestion would be to tell them that you found it disrespectful and that you, as a couple, are no longer interested in them - provided they knew that there was that potential there.

I have every intention of introducing potential girls to my owner, if for no other reason than I want everyone to get along. If they can't at least be friendly and hold up a decent conversation with him, they aren't for me. I'd also like them to get along so that we have the option of being all involved together at some point - things don't have to go that way, but I'd like the option.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 1/4/2008 4:52:44 PM >

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to heartsemerge)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 7:04:54 PM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: backseatbebe

why hasnt anyone said the Dom should say something?
someone is insulting what is his, yet hes cool with it even when you arent

Two reasons why I haven't said anything:
 
One, the dom isn't an active part of the topic so who knows what he thinks.
 
And two, the gist of my post is that he's insulting what's his by having her do it so that standard ain't gonna improve from total strangers....
 
Focus.

(in reply to backseatbebe)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 7:11:28 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Not at all. They are aware that you aren't interested in friendship but that you are trolling for a third. Thus, having decided that you fit the bill, they now need to decide if he's suitable for them. They're saving their own time.

Instead of waiting until they are unsuspecting friends and then seducing them, try being upfront about it. Write in your profile looking for a third. Write that in your emails that you get veto power and won't okay anyone who ignores you, assuming you do.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to sakidorei)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 7:24:45 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I understand the frustration here, and it really can be tough and certainly makes everything more complicated and harder from the get go- but it helps to look at it from the other side.

He is primarily a dominant, and interacts with fem subs flirting with him as such.

She is primarily a submissive, and interacts with male doms flirting with her as such.

Their compatibility on an intimate nature is far more immediate, organic, and likely to spark butterflies.

It's only natural they would click and want to build with eachother more than another chick who is kind of a friend.

Again, it's still annoying, it's still frustrating- and you should work on your immediate screening skills if you want to keep doing this because you're just picking the same wrong sorts of people now.

But mostly, realize what THEY do together doesn't mean anything about YOUR relationship with your dom unless he allows it to.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: What should I do? - 1/4/2008 7:27:07 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissMagnolia
So, in essense, you are acting as a pimp for yourself and your master, though he isn't asking you to do this.

Well I'll just point out that being a whore or a pimp isn't necessarily bad- certainly not on this site where a lot of well respected posters have been/are whores and pimps on some level.

But I don't see that as necessarily what's going on at all.  Trying to make love/sex connections isn't the same as pimping someone out.

quote:

So it is YOUR doing. You deserve all you get.

She deserves someone else choosing to ignore her?

Her making some bad choices in friends and dealing with the natural consequences may indeed have some self responsibility involved.

But she doesn't "deserve" to be treated badly, even if she makes some mistakes in judgement.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to MissMagnolia)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: What should I do? - 1/5/2008 6:22:44 AM   
heartsemerge


Posts: 29
Joined: 10/13/2007
Status: offline 		lol@ me pimping myself out. Some people are ridiculous.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: What should I do? - 1/5/2008 7:01:38 AM   
LaMspeach


Posts: 794
Joined: 12/4/2004
From: Philadelphia area, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: backseatbebe

why hasnt anyone said the Dom should say something?
someone is insulting what is his, yet hes cool with it even when you arent

Two reasons why I haven't said anything:
 
One, the dom isn't an active part of the topic so who knows what he thinks.
 
And two, the gist of my post is that he's insulting what's his by having her do it so that standard ain't gonna improve from total strangers....
 
Focus.


Why is it that every time a sub post something like this the Dom is being disrespectful, the Dom is “making “ the sub do it, the Dom is looking to "trade up" at the first opportunity , he isn’t satisfied  ect….

When in fact the sub wants the second for many reasons and isn’t made to do it at all nor is she acting a pimp for the Dom.




_____________________________

peach ~ LordandMasters devoted alpha slave
"Only when the year has grown cold does one know that the pine and cypress are the last to wither"



(in reply to Focus50)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: What should I do? - 1/5/2008 7:41:11 AM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		I'm going to say the opposite of what most people on here seem to be saying (or at least expressing).

Keep on doing exactly what you're doing.  One day, you'll befriend a girl who WON'T stop talking to you the instant she meets your master, and maybe that'll be the day you both find someone worthy of your love.

(in reply to LaMspeach)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: What should I do? - 1/5/2008 8:09:03 AM   
sakidorei


Posts: 65
Status: offline 		heartsemerge ... honestly some people might have made what is in your mind ... ridiculous assumptions however, you didn't answer my question and it does seem to have bearing on this. 
 
Are you seeking the girl for your own Topping experience as a switch or are you seeking her to be a fellow submissive in serving your Dom?
 
~saki
Property of Master D.

_____________________________

Followers, do not backlead. Not only does it make leading more difficult, but it also makes it more difficult for the leader to avoid collisions.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: What should I do? - 1/5/2008 9:02:45 AM   
backseatbebe


Posts: 195
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaMspeach

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: backseatbebe

why hasnt anyone said the Dom should say something?
someone is insulting what is his, yet hes cool with it even when you arent

Two reasons why I haven't said anything:
 
One, the dom isn't an active part of the topic so who knows what he thinks.
 
And two, the gist of my post is that he's insulting what's his by having her do it so that standard ain't gonna improve from total strangers....
 
Focus.


Why is it that every time a sub post something like this the Dom is being disrespectful, the Dom is “making “ the sub do it, the Dom is looking to "trade up" at the first opportunity , he isn’t satisfied  ect….

When in fact the sub wants the second for many reasons and isn’t made to do it at all nor is she acting a pimp for the Dom.




wow you are way off
not once did i say the Dom was pimping, trading up, unstatsisfied or making her do it.
im just saying its not up to the already owned sub to make sure respect to both people involved is honored, which it isnt
unless you believe a sub should be speaking on behalf of their master?!

and DesFIP, im wondering how is the pontential sub wasting their time if they talk to BOTH the sub and Dom, sure they need to talk to him but why ignore her?

(in reply to LaMspeach)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: What should I do? - 1/5/2008 1:47:09 PM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LaMspeach

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

quote:

ORIGINAL: backseatbebe

why hasnt anyone said the Dom should say something?
someone is insulting what is his, yet hes cool with it even when you arent

Two reasons why I haven't said anything:
 
One, the dom isn't an active part of the topic so who knows what he thinks.
 
And two, the gist of my post is that he's insulting what's his by having her do it so that standard ain't gonna improve from total strangers....
 
Focus.


Why is it that every time a sub post something like this the Dom is being disrespectful, the Dom is “making “ the sub do it, the Dom is looking to "trade up" at the first opportunity , he isn’t satisfied  ect….

It's merely *my* opinion based on the limited information available. 
 
It's not possible I'm right? 
 
You actually know what this particular dom's motivation is?
 
Finally, if a dom isn't making or asking his sub to troll on his/their behalf, then the sub might logically be perceived has having quite some nerve in deciding to introduce strangers to their relationship, no?  And if yes, who really has control here?

quote:

When in fact the sub wants the second for many reasons and isn’t made to do it at all nor is she acting a pimp for the Dom.

"When in fact"?  You claiming to know more than you're letting on about the OP's relationship?

And "pimp for the Dom"?  You still talking to me?
 
Focus.

(in reply to LaMspeach)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: What should I do? - 1/5/2008 2:10:48 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Yes, she's talking to you.  Not used to women disagreeing with you?  Sometimes they have a mind, you know.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

You still talking to me?

(in reply to Focus50)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: What should I do? - 1/5/2008 2:45:06 PM   
Focus50


Posts: 3962
Joined: 12/28/2004
From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Yes, she's talking to you.  Not used to women disagreeing with you?  Sometimes they have a mind, you know.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

You still talking to me?


Lmao, the mindless shining knight to the rescue!
 
Yes, I'm actually familiar with women disagreeing with me; just as I'm accustomed to people on this site accrediting me with things I never said - like that pimp comment....
 
Let me guess - you have nothing to apologise for, right?
 
Focus.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 40
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