Am I crazy? (Full Version)

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kaosman777 -> Am I crazy? (1/5/2008 1:33:52 PM)

I went to see my psychiatrist today. I explained to him that I have this problem. " I keep thinking that I am a pair of curtains!" I explained to him. The Doctor leaned forward and grabbed me by the shoulders. Shaking me he yelled, "Pull youself together man!"




HypnoticDan -> RE: Am I crazy? (1/6/2008 1:41:19 AM)

My psychologist said something to me yesterday that, after 12 years of intensive therapy and huge bills, made me weep.

"No habla ingles."




DefiantFlower -> RE: Am I crazy? (1/6/2008 2:26:28 AM)

A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage, he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"

She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "NO! I won't sleep with you tonight!" Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.

After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology, and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations."

To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What do you mean $200?!"




DefiantFlower -> RE: Am I crazy? (1/6/2008 2:28:45 AM)

Hehe...and just because this is my favorite of all time...

"Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are depressed, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.
If you are delusional and occasionally hallucinate, please be aware that the thing you are holding on the side of your head is alive and about to bite off your ear."




darchChylde -> RE: Am I crazy? (1/6/2008 11:09:48 AM)

my imaginary friend no longer believes in me




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