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oliderid -> Question for subs (1/6/2008 10:57:45 AM)

Well i've got a question I have never dared ask a sub involved in a lifestyle D/S relationship.

I've met intelligent sub in my local scene.  Few were living a true D/S relationship. I mean a 24/24 commitment. But somes do. They puzzle me.
Let's say that you have a promising carreer, you worked hard to get your diploma. You've got a enormous potential, so many things to do by your own and to be proud of it...How can you leave all these rewarding things behind you to focus yourself exclusively on your dom(me)? I don't get it. it is like passing through your life without leaving any footmark.










ourgirl -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 11:09:42 AM)

i've never replied on here before, but after reading your question, i just had to.  Why do you assume being a submissive or a slave means giving up your career or your potential or that that somehow makes you invisible?  Could it not be possible that your intelligence or education is one of the things that your Dom values?  To each His own, right?  i am a slave, i am also educated and work at home as well as take care of three children.  i find it disturbing that it is assumed i am somehow invisible, then?  how does being who i am mean i am giving up my potential? 

for some slaves, yes, it means giving up their careers outside of the home, but more times than not, i have found that those people find much more comfort, joy and fulfillment by being a slave to their Master than they do in putting on a suit and being a slave to their career.  of course, i cannot speak for everyone, just my humble opinion.  truly being of service to another is one of the greatest achievements that i personally can think of.



came4U -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 11:12:19 AM)

I don't know about others, but obtaining a few degrees was for personal gratification and yes, even partly just to see if I could.  What does it mean to me? not a hell of a lot more than pieces of paper. 

To discontinue formal education/career for a man/Dominant is not a hard decision at all.  One man just may be worth removing such credentials from my grip. 

Yes, the inner, inate and nurturistic emotions of a sincerely Dominant man could remove all logical thought processes and turn a gal 'blonde' (no, offence to blondes) quite happily and willingly. On leaving a footprint on the world hmm maybe the satisfaction of pleasing a man who chooses you as a lifemate is more worthy than such degrees/careers. 

To most, maybe the hallmark itself is instinctual and a long-craving necessity that education or position of power in life cannot fulfill. 

Does that satisfy the curiosity in the question you asked?  



takenbyjohnr07 -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 11:18:53 AM)

i am a stay at home Mom, i have worked all of my life since i was 16. i choose to be home where i am happy, loved, needed and appreciated. i find the fringe benefits to be excellent.



littleone35 -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 11:19:13 AM)

My Master is happy i am going to school and getting my education.  he encourages me , and he wants me to do well.  he expects me to get an 80 or above on all my tests.  Just cause you are a sub orslave does not mean you are less then anyone else.  I am not invisible.  Many subs i know work otside the house.  Just cause we decided to hand ourselves over to the care of another does not mean we cease to be people.

Matt's littleone



rubberpet -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 11:19:14 AM)

If Mistress and I were set for life (by winning the Powerball lottery), then I could easily forget a career and focus exclusively on Her and my service to Her.  But I know we would be doing a lot of things on top of constant D/s.  But since that will never happen, I don't really think about it.  I'm Her slave 24/7 and She is my domme 24/7, but there is no rigid protocol.  No matter what or where, She is my domme first and I accept Her decisions.



Einzelganger -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 11:21:12 AM)

Well...it's not an easy decision to be sure, especially if you love your job.  If I were in a relationship with a wonderful woman who offered me her collar in exchange for my career...I'd gladly give up my career.  As much as I love my current job, neither it nor my previous ones will ever bring me the sort of joy that would come with 24/7 servitude.  Granted, she'd have to be financially able to support us both if I were to drop my career, but I'd do it in a heartbeat.  I suppose I'm just not that worried about leaving a 'footprint' with my life.

-Einzelgänger



takenbyjohnr07 -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 11:21:13 AM)

A dominant whgo makes you give up things that you love or need is not a Dominant He/She is a bully.



Einzelganger -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 11:28:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: takenbyjohnr07

A dominant whgo makes you give up things that you love or need is not a Dominant He/She is a bully.


That dominant is not a bully if the sub wants to give it up, and does so willingly.

Just my $0.02...

-Einzelgänger



beargonewild -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 12:03:14 PM)

At this point in life, I don't believe I would nor could give up a career to solely focus on my dom. Part of my sense of self worth is knowing I am fulfilling a dream that i worked towards. I do believe in giving much of my focus towards my dom yet also strive to acheive a balance between the two if at all possible. Yet if I met the dom who is perfect for me, that could all change too.



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 12:13:05 PM)

If being true to who you are and fulfilled in yourself means staying at home and living primarily that sort of life, then you're leaving the best mark you possibly could.

What's the point of "leaving a mark" if you are empty and dead inside?

That's somewhat like asking women how they can choose not to bear children because doesn't that make them feel useless and like they aren't serving the world (and yes, I've had people ask me that question).

Someone's "leaving a mark" is another persons "hell on earth."  You would do well to remember that.



hisannabelle -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 12:38:44 PM)

greetings oliderid,

because it fulfills me. i have all of those things - a promising academic career, getting ready to go into graduate school, etc. for now, he lets me keep them, but i know that is ultimately up to him. i would not want it to be any other way. for me, it's inner motivation - not so much about making my "mark on the world," so to speak. i do what i do in work, school, and my hobbies because i love doing it. i please him also because i love doing it. pleasing him happens to fulfill me the most, so it supercedes all of those things.

respectfully,
annabelle.



AquaticSub -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 12:41:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

If being true to who you are and fulfilled in yourself means staying at home and living primarily that sort of life, then you're leaving the best mark you possibly could.

What's the point of "leaving a mark" if you are empty and dead inside?

That's somewhat like asking women how they can choose not to bear children because doesn't that make them feel useless and like they aren't serving the world (and yes, I've had people ask me that question).

Someone's "leaving a mark" is another persons "hell on earth."  You would do well to remember that.


What she said. *chuckles*



RCdc -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 12:45:59 PM)

Just because I serve and submit to Darcy, doesn't mean I am unfulfilled nor empty.  Doesn;t mean I am not filling my potential.  Everything I have learnt, trained for becomes his.  That is incredibly fulfilling and means my potential is being released and exercised.  Who says I leave them behind if I am utilising my talents for him?  Who says I am not leaving a mark?  I think you have made too many assumptions without enough basis.  Everything I am is him.  And to him I am everything.
 
quote:

Nothing ever exists entirely alone, everything is in relation to everything else.
Buddha

 
the.dark.



meticulousgirl -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 12:46:32 PM)

i'm aloud my career, my friends, and all of the money i earn at my job....we dont have to give up everything, just the choices.  If i were Owned by someone that wanted me to quit my job and stay home and our family could afford it, i would start my own business and work from home while completing whatever tasks and not to mention i would be much happier not having to commute three hours out of my day....

~meticulous~



takenbyjohnr07 -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 1:40:47 PM)

My posts says "makes you" it does not say requests that you give something up.



juliaoceania -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 1:42:09 PM)

One can be a 24-7 submissive and a successful person. My Daddy wants me to fulfill my purpose, to be the most I can be, and by doing this I am serving him.... 



takenbyjohnr07 -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 1:43:10 PM)

Hi! My post says "makes you" which is different from requesting and giving you the choice.



LadySeraphina -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 1:49:37 PM)

I don't think that's entirely what the point of the OP was though, takenbyjohnr07. And ultimately these subs/slaves who have indicated they would give up their jobs if their Dom(me) wanted them to are still making the choice. They choose to obey their owner.

I do not make requests of my slave, I tell him my wishes, and he obeys. If he has concerns, we discuss it, but ultimately my will rules, as it should be. I am not a bully.

-Lady Seraphina



unravel -> RE: Question for subs (1/6/2008 2:13:06 PM)

i agree with the "choice" concept raised by Lady Seraphina. In the end, it is a matter of choice for the submissive. Does it make him/her a lesser/more invisible person? Well it depends on the submissive's perspective and overall philosophy of Life, i would say.
And such perspective/philosophy can change with time too, as was raised by beargonewild above.
So for many, i think on the contrary for them their "mark", as you put it, would be in such abandonment to One.
unravel



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