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LadyHugs -> RE: Do we tend to be too one dimensional? (1/7/2008 9:56:14 PM)
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Dear MidMichCowboy, Ladies and Gentlemen;
It is my belief that people as an individual have many dimensions to their individualism and I prefer to use the identifying as 'arch-type' as to describe like a puzzle piece as to help what creates an individual like me and, those who can identify with like 'arch types.' Unfortunately, labels come with the territory as there is nothing that has a uniformed understanding and or definition other than 'scene' labeling and or vocabulary. Other information bearing comments would be '...I wear many hats;' per se.
For example, I am sure we can freely discuss Western style of riding, from the different aspects of what Western riding style can include as well as exclude. From Western Riding, the 'dressage' of the Western equestrian and horse at the epitome of obedience, responsiveness and skill and riding, to the Western Pleasure and 'In-hand.' Pleasure and or working groups. The gear that is subtle but a keen eye would notice the difference from a reining saddle from a roping saddle, etc.
My personal observation and opinions on the appearance of being 'one dimentional' is often due to a new/newer/novice/stranger exposed to the 'sharks' and or 'seniors' in the scene. Just looking how passionate some Dominants are, judgement of every nit picking aspects of other's lives, experiences and actualling 'sizing one another up' will keep people from opening up to strangers right away. Time allows the ability to settle in and get past the initial intimidation of individuals, the public dungeon scene, the party dungeon scene, private dungeon scenes and in other spaces where people are under judgment and observation at all times. This does not even include envy, pride, ego and territorial behavior that some Dominants exhibit and or manifest in such a way as to shut off other dimentions from showing.
As far as the scene example of the Dom leaving and not comforting a sub/slave--who is to say that there was or was not a negotiation of how to end and follow up, e.g. after care? Some subs/slaves/masochists don't like aftercare and some do. Emotions and mental states also differ day to day with the same slave. One day they'll need nothing, the next they need cuddling and snuggle for hours time. The Dominant is as good as his exposure, his communication, his training and knowledge and; the understanding that a scene doesn't really end when toys are packed and after care given hours ago. The Dominant is part of a special relationship and until both individuals of the relationship are ready to cut the tether--as in support and checking into one another's welfare after the 'physical' scene--then that is when the scene is concluded. People too often forget the 'scene' for slaves, submissives and or masochists involve more than physical aspects--it involves emotions, mental and at time spiritual and or sensuality.
I can understand the 'one-dimensional' character as a 'Do me' and or 'Service Top.' Which is physical and topical and really does not go further. Until both parties understand what is happening to them beyond the physical and topical--do they appreciate the layers and dimensions we (in a general sense) all possess.
Just some thoughts.
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs
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