I am finding it hard to meet.... (Full Version)

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Winkinggoddess -> I am finding it hard to meet.... (1/6/2008 5:07:10 PM)

Hi All -
I am a submissive female - not new to the scene - but I have always played within a community - and mostly with one Top. I would like to find a local play partner - but as a submissive - I am very concerned about going to a hotel or someone's home to begin. I live in the NYC...and would like to meet a man that would be willing to have initial play sessions in a public play space such as Paddles. It would make me feel safter - and more able to surrender. I am finding that so many people are reluctant to play in public...what is a girl suppose to do???
Kate



AMaster -> RE: I am finding it hard to meet.... (1/6/2008 6:15:08 PM)

You make me sorry I left New York.



Lena7 -> RE: I am finding it hard to meet.... (1/6/2008 6:21:20 PM)

I am right there with you.  It is not easy just to trust anyone while you are being a sub.  A couple Dom's that wanted to meet were not confortable in the public eye.  I would not compromise and stay with going to a place like Paddles to play at first. 




Verdelet -> RE: I am finding it hard to meet.... (1/7/2008 12:04:00 PM)

I'm one of those who are not comfortable in the public ONLY because I am high profile within the U.S. Not a good thing if people knew I strung up girls or caged them. Of course I meet at restaurants and such, but playing in public is a huge no no for me. However, as Lena stated, trusting is not easy and is hard to come by these days. 



CelticPrince -> RE: I am finding it hard to meet.... (1/7/2008 5:48:41 PM)

kate,

relax, you will be flooded with offers here.

Good fortune,

CP



lilabbotsfordgrl -> RE: I am finding it hard to meet.... (1/7/2008 5:53:37 PM)

I'd never play in public personally, ESPECIALLY with someone I wasn't comfortable with.  That would just ruin the entire experience.  In fact I doubt I could even do it at all to begin with.  Playing is private for me and I want security of knowing I'm alone with him.  Even if I was meeting someone new, I'd want it to be safe but semiprivate, like at a quiet restaurant, and then in his place.  Somewhere he's in control of, where he can do what he wants with me.  After all, that's my desire.  :) 

But I do share with you the trouble of meeting anyone.  I'm in Vancouver BC, young and horny, and there's literally nobody else in the area looking someone like me.  Disturbing and upsetting!



SoCurious2Feel -> RE: I am finding it hard to meet.... (1/7/2008 6:06:29 PM)

I think it's hard to meet anyone anywhere.  It's hard to be safe and meet someone, especially because so many seem to expect to play when first meeting.  If I don't know you, how can I be expected to submit with no trust?



SeraphimsPhoto -> RE: I am finding it hard to meet.... (1/7/2008 7:43:28 PM)

Hello Winkinggoddess,   This being my 3rd post here in the forums please take anything I say with a grain of salt.   Treat an encounter with a possible new Dominant partner as you would any other encounter with a new person. Go on a dinner date. Talk to the person. Feel them out for that “I will stab you when you are helpless” twitch. Talk to them about what is acceptable and what is not with you. Communication is the key to any good relationship. Be it a one night spanking to something more permanent.   Because you have met a person “paddle in hand” in no way means bend over and take it now.   Good Luck in your searches.



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