RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (Full Version)

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MsCfromMelbourne -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/12/2008 4:48:41 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CuckoldSameh

I heard from several Mistresses that they are against having sexual intercourse - penetration - with their slaves . I mean even their long term live in slaves . Why ? What's is the reason for this in your opinion ? And do you think it's a real phenomenon ???


This topic comes up a lot!  Is it real?  Yes. 

Reasons?  It depends on the Domme, the sub and their relationship.  My observations so far (and there are plenty more reasons I am sure):

1    Most pro-dommes (in my home town at least) will not have penetrative sex with clients.  That does not mean they  never take very special clients as lovers, but doing so tends to wreck their professional and commercial relationship.

2    Some lifestyle (non-pro) dommes feel they cannot effectively dominate a man  and have penetrative sex as an expression of love with the same man. But that is not true of all Dommes.

3     Most Dommes IME have some "friendship" based D/s relationships where they will dominate a man they feel no sexual attraction for at all.  Many men will grab the opportunity to be in a sex-less D/s friendship because any Mistress is better than no Mistress until Mistress Right comes along.  The experience can still be great fun

4   Some Dommes say they do not "do sex" because they are already in monogamous relationships (especially married) and wish to be faithful.  That does not mean they are not incredibly turned on by their submissive and want to screw him. 

5   Some Dommes are frigid, asexual or lesbian and hence don't want sexual love with any man, submissive or not. 

6    Some Dommes have ingrained ideas from religion/family upbringing that "giving" men sex is a "submissive" thing to do or exploitation and hence is powerless, not powerful.

7    Some women also carry strong ideas that "sex is dirty" and "good girls don't love sex".  They are attracted to BDSM because it seems to offer extreme intimacy (what could be more intimate than ownership of another human being body and soul?) with no threat of that "dirty sex business".   Fear of intimacy and sex is powerful but can be overcome by a skilled submissive (safe, non sexually aggressive) man.  You can slip under the radar [:)]  Just be careful if the Domme's preference for celibacy is caused by previous sexual abuse especially in childhood (which is very sadly not that unusual)

8   Some Dommes frankly do not like and respect submissive men.  They see them as weak, stupid men who can be bullied and used (as, say, free house cleaners).  Sex with these Dommes is a reward only befitting "alpha" men, other Dominants and/or even vanilla men.  They do not believe male submission can be an expression of sexual love that should be honoured.  However the sexually rejecting Domme is a very popular fantasy, so these Dommes have no trouble finding eager subs. 

 9   Some Dommes believe that, in a loving D/s relationship, sex is an expression of love (albeit very alternative love!).  Penetration does not make them feel any less dominant, exploited or - egads! - submissive.  If a D/s couple love eachother so much they choose to be monogamous and want a family, penetrative sex is pretty likely.  (Disclosure: my submissive and I are expecting our first baby in March)

Good luck finding the right Domme and the right D/s relationship for you



PsyVamp -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/12/2008 6:03:49 PM)

I already have a playmate, so having sex with a slave would be something that I would not do casually. 



MsCfromMelbourne -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/12/2008 6:31:19 PM)

I knew if I pondered long enough, reason 10 would emerge!

10   Many men see a BDSM personal site and think "Great!  Kinky women must be horny, slutty whores and too stupid to charge me".  Kinky women are of course not easier.  Probably less so.  But to deter that kind of slime, many kinky women will put "no sex" in their profile.  Then only consider men willing to pursue her with (theoretically) no prospect of kinky sex.  Its not a bad screening technique. 



Lashra -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/12/2008 6:39:20 PM)

I have sex with my slave, thats one of his duties. Besides he is hot and we have rough hot sex and that means a lot to me.[:D]

~Lashra



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/12/2008 8:14:52 PM)

Well shoot, if I had a slave that could produce the kind of sex I like, I might do it! 

Excellent list, MsC!



Shawn1066 -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/12/2008 9:29:04 PM)

My Owner does have sex with me whenever and wherever she pleases...  Being a slave in the sexual capacity is a duty of mine and it's something that we both enjoy.  In my experience, orgasms don't make me any more or less submissive.  I retain that even after an orgasm or two.  I suppose that's because my submission isn't primarily sexual.  It's based a great deal in many other areas.  The only negative side-effect probably being that my short-term memory goes to hell for a few minutes. :-p

In regards to her, it doesn't seem to me that she becomes vulnerable or anything like that after an orgasm.  We both just get kind of cuddly for a second or two.  Oh, and then a few minutes later we will have ice cream if things have been particularly rough. :-D



littlesarbonn -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/12/2008 9:48:51 PM)

::littlesarbonn looks for all the ones that say "yes" and then automatically addresses his form letter introduction to each and every one of them, realizing that as long as he uses :: marks, they'll have no idea he's doing it. ::



MamaDomme1 -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/13/2008 5:57:55 AM)

I am not opposed to having sex with a slave-- depending on the dynamics of the situation.  I have had slaves that I had absolutely no interest in having sex with and then I have had some that were purely sex slaves.

At the moment, I am not involved with anyone in any way, so not sure what my next choice will be.



thetammyjo -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/13/2008 6:23:38 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Kaiynasha
Therefore what's the problem? If I become pregnant by the sex- does me being pregnant make me less dominant? I don't think so.



For me that's not the issue at all.

It's being ready, able and willing to bring another life into the world.

I like my adult world, I have no need or desire to change it, and I know offspring would change things, on some level very radically. Intercourse isn't about power or authority to me, it's about risk very pleasure.

Since I can find so many other activities equally or more pleasurable I'd decided the risk is not worth intercourse in my life at this time.



LadyHugs -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/13/2008 7:52:50 AM)

Dear CuckoldSameh, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
For me, personally -- anybody can have sex but, not anybody can be a slave.
 
I do not enjoy sexual intercourse and or other sexual stimulation and at my age--I really don't need sex as to feel more womanly and or powerful and or 'loved.'
 
For me, men have used sex like a hammer, a means of bribing, a means of control and manipulation.  It is usually a man's personal pleasure and relief--the question becomes; what about me?  In a patriarchal society and civilization, 'men' have dominated and made domineering rules over women for the majority of Earth's history.  Single women for years were thought of as rejects and 'old maids.'  One was pressured to get married.  My own mother was despirate to see me married.  It isn't as horrible to be single anymore and women have finally got some options.  Women are still not paid equally.  It took a lot of years for women to finally get a vote.  It took a lot of years for women to have their own bank account when married, to have property in their name and so much more progress.
 
For me, it comes to the summary; that I want to be respected as a human being--not for my sexual genitals and or how much sexual intercourse and or interactions I'm willing to 'put out.'  I refuse to submit to some sexual hammer over my head which men use against women--'you aren't a woman if you don't do this or that.'  I am biologically a woman in every way and I am who I am.  It all boils down to men coming into my world--not me coming into theirs.  If you don't like a non-sexual relationship--don't even consider me.  This does not mean I don't like sensuality and sexual attraction and or the foreplay--I might even dabble in sexual intercourse however, I do not want a man thinking that sex and or sexual intercourse is the total sum of who I am, as a Dominant and or as a woman/lady.
 
I also do not have lovers.  I don't need 'lovers' to feel loved.  Friends, slaves and family produce the love that transends a few moments of lust.
 
Just some thoughts.
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs



Kaiynasha -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/13/2008 10:40:59 AM)

thetammyjo I respect what you have said about not taking the risk. Only you can decide what's good or bad for you.

And on bringing a new life into the world- is a very serious subject. Even for me. It would definitely bring up new feelings about that life and for myself such as being a mother,  a wife, and a woman.

I have a very strong libido and I am not the type of person who will just go pick someone up for sex. I need the connection as well and I am not talking about sexual connection. If that connection comes from my slave (male or female)- then hell I will more than likely enjoy sex with them.

MK 




MistressNoName -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/13/2008 11:02:41 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: MsCfromMelbourne

I knew if I pondered long enough, reason 10 would emerge!

10 Many men see a BDSM personal site and think "Great! Kinky women must be horny, slutty whores and too stupid to charge me". Kinky women are of course not easier. Probably less so. But to deter that kind of slime, many kinky women will put "no sex" in their profile. Then only consider men willing to pursue her with (theoretically) no prospect of kinky sex. Its not a bad screening technique.



Perhaps. I think the block button makes a better screening tool, though.

As for OP - I know of several Women in the life who would not have sex with their slaves and it seems to boil down to the issue of not being on equal footing with them... They seem to feel that sexual intimacy is something to be shared only with an equal partner. I personally, come from a different stand point, which is I do not desire to be in a relationship with a dominant male. They do not excite me in anyway and I have no desire to be in an "equal" partnership type relationship. My desire is to be head of my household. So, my answer would be, yes, I would have sex with my slave.

MNN



LadyPact -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/13/2008 12:13:18 PM)

I think I've put this in other responses to similar questions that have been on the boards before.  It's really depended on the dynamic that I've had at the time.  With My first slave, I had absolutely no sex of any kind, in part because I was still learning so much about the lifestyle.  It was important to Me to keep certain things completely without sex.  With My pet, I considered him to be what some may call a "full service" boy.  In that situation, sexual service, including intercourse, were part of his duties.  My current submissive has vaginal coitus as a hard limit, due to his own situation.  There are other areas where he's involved in sexual service, but not intercourse.



mons -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/14/2008 2:14:20 AM)

greeting ladies and slave

nope he has not earn it if and when he does he may but i have always not made love with my slave . it just something i don't find please for me . to tell the Truth i felt like this before i knew i was a dom me i had a horrible experience as a child and i find that it was not my fault and so i have no shame in telling this. i man broke into our place and rape my mother not more the five feet in front of all of us kids we just stood there we were to little and had no phone or way of calling for help and everyone that is all i can remember of that day hard as i might that it is. so yes big problem for me. wow.

thanks for letting get that out
mons



DarlaDarling -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/14/2008 10:09:12 AM)

I don't need to have sex with a slave--he's a person who is there to be of service to me and if service doesn't include sex...then service doesn't include sex.





MsIncontrol -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/14/2008 10:35:21 AM)

I am married to  my subsmissive and we do have intercourse on a regular basis.  However, most of my previous submissives have not been sexual partners. 



lateralist1 -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/14/2008 11:28:17 AM)

I hope telling us of your experience has helped you mons.
And being a Domme is helping you understand that all men are not your mother's rapist.
Being a Domme is certainly helping me get over my childhood abuse.
It's a long painful journey sometimes but there are people here who care.
To answer the question yes if I find the right TPE BDSM relationship I will have sex with him. I will hope that he won't see it as service but making love.



ShaktiSama -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/14/2008 4:37:19 PM)

I can see the fun of dominating different men in different ways, but I would love to have a good sex slave.  A man who knows how to use his body for my pleasure is a true gem.  [:)]



LadyHibiscus -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/14/2008 7:21:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaktiSama

I can see the fun of dominating different men in different ways, but I would love to have a good sex slave.  A man who knows how to use his body for my pleasure is a true gem.  [:)]


And you'll have him teach seminars for other men, right?  <G>



ShaktiSama -> RE: Would you have intercourse with your slave ? (1/14/2008 7:39:53 PM)

I hadn't thought of that!  What fun.  A whole seminar of men who want to learn to please women is a bit of a turn-on in and of itself, isn't it?  [:D] 



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