Dominance With No Room For Submission

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touchofeuphoria -> Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 3:17:50 AM)
I've heard mistresses claim there's not a submissive bone in their body. This question applies to you. Is there even just one person that you can think of that, that you'd submit to? ..maybe the person who trained you in the first place?

LadyHathor -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 4:29:44 AM)
*For Me, the answer is simple, No, there is no submission in My soul.* *I was not trained--I was---* *then I came to be.*

MsSavra -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 5:09:59 AM)
Yes, there was a person, who introduced me to the concept of D/s as something that people can live in reality (as opposed to just dream about like I had done for years). I learned - and grew - and outgrew!

DianeB269 -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 5:19:02 AM)
Tried to be a bottom once, it lasted 5 minutes.. Diane

MistressOfGa -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 5:23:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHathor *For Me, the answer is simple, No, there is no submission in My soul.* *I was not trained--I was---* *then I came to be.* What She said <s>

LaTigresse -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 5:23:57 AM)
Trying to find the best way to word my thoughts so that they make sense. I've never felt submissive, I did my best to try and BE a nice well behaved vanilla type submissive woman, but I was playing a role and very miserable. There are very few people that I want to actively dominate yet none that make me want to submit. This does not mean I cannot be kind and respectful, or give credit to those with more knowledge than I, or to accept that there will be people with more authortity in many given situations. To fight that within myself would not be dominance it would be ignorance. I am very assertive in my life outside of a M/s relationship, but that is not dominance. I know many submissives and slaves that are strong and assertive in the bulk of their life activities. Perhaps I am the oddball in that I just don't feel the need to try and prove anything, to assert my dominance with people, that it just purely does not matter. Let's be honest, the only people it should really matter with, are those we are in that type of relationship with. All the rest is just additional fluff.

AtlantaMistress -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 6:11:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse quote: Perhaps I am the oddball in that I just don't feel the need to try and prove anything, to assert my dominance with people, that it just purely does not matter. Let's be honest, the only people it should really matter with, are those we are in that type of relationship with. All the rest is just additional fluff. Kudos! Always these needs for labels, categories, generalizations. I think just like the Kinsey scale, there is no Black and White, yet many shades of gray. However, at the end of the day, the only person's opinion that matters is my own. I think the relationships with each person are totally unique and although a person may have Dominant or submissive tendancies, who we are depends on the dynamics of the individual relationship in question. That said - hell no, I still won't submit [:'(]

thetammyjo -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 6:32:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: touchofeuphoria I've heard mistresses claim there's not a submissive bone in their body. This question applies to you. Is there even just one person that you can think of that, that you'd submit to? ..maybe the person who trained you in the first place? No. I used an apprenticeship model of learning about BDSM. I observed and spoke to more experienced people who had skills I wanted to learn and learned from them one at a time. I never had a single mentor though I have been asked to mentor others and have -- I always encouraged those new tops to learn from a range of people frankly. I did try the sub thing twice and each time the person who was supposed to be giving me a taste of that was too freaked out by the vibes I was giving off to do anything. The vibes weren't purposely just simply a reflection of me and my past. Now that's in terms of BDSM. In meatlife everyone of us must bend and be flexible in order to survive. I can't say I was always thrilled with being a student but if I wanted to get a PhD and later a tenure track job I had to work within that established system. The ability to do that however does not reflect what we choose to do or desire to do in our private lives.

thetammyjo -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 6:37:07 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse Perhaps I am the oddball in that I just don't feel the need to try and prove anything, to assert my dominance with people, that it just purely does not matter. Let's be honest, the only people it should really matter with, are those we are in that type of relationship with. All the rest is just additional fluff. No, I'd say this isn't odd, this is a sign of naturalness. If one's innate personality matches ones scene role I don't think there is a need to demonstrate anything. It simply flows. I think a lot of new people believe that being dominant is the same as being a bully or being domineering or being a control freak or being uncaring. Perhaps it's based on porn, perhaps it's based on early partners who used the ideas of BDSM to mask their own abusiveness and role-playing. I was really trying to play by the rules at my interviews last weekend and I do well because I'm getting invites to campuses now but I just couldn't play the "answer the questions" role only. I had questions of my own to ask, I had experiences to share, and philosophies to discuss. I wasn't trying to show I can/will be a leader, I simply am.

MistressFaye1 -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 8:59:49 AM)
Sung to the tune of that old Lay's potato chips commercial: I tried, I just couldn't do it! I tried, I just couldn't do it! I can't submit to one! I love the shades of dominance, shades of dominance! Ms. Faye

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 9:05:10 AM)
Nope. And I am the only daughter of an only daughter in an ethnic household, so I DO understand what it is to serve. I am also able to separate "bottoming" from "submission"----I haven't bottomed in years, but I do like certain kinds of sensation play, and I can enjoy them without feeling anything remotely like submission. I also love to be tied! Again, I never feel out of control of the situation. And though I had several exceptional teachers on my path, and continue to learn, I was never "trained" to be a dominant.

Lashra -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 11:03:18 AM)
No I do not have a submissive personality at all. There is no one who's feet I wish to kneel at. I trained myself as a Mistress by reading and by trial and error. I enjoy my Dominance and it is who I am. ~Lashra

ItalianSMistress -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 11:26:27 AM)
I could not even think of trying to submit to someone else, omg, what a mess that would be. I was never trained, I learned with My first slave, by trial and error also. I have been and will always be aggresssive and dominant, even as a child.

Kaiynasha -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/12/2008 1:28:26 PM)
No. MK

TexasMaam -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/13/2008 11:04:24 AM)
I submit to my boss every day at the office. Every day, I make that conscious choice to do so for my own betterment, because he's a great boss. It helps that he's a real subbie at heart and does everything I ask of him. ; ) TM

MistressNoName -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/13/2008 11:13:09 AM)
quote: Is there even just one person that you can think of that, that you'd submit to? No. There are people I would gladly bottom to for flogging play only, but I do not consider that to be the same as submission. I did the submissive thing. When I first came out it was as submissive. It did not work for me. Still, I believe that humans are much more dynamic and fluid then some of their words seem to be. But, that's just my personal opinion, not a statement based on any empirical research. MNN

MissJana -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/13/2008 11:21:37 AM)
I am a Domme but I did start out as a submissive (HAH not a very submissive one LOL) I was actually more of a SAM. I will still bottom on ocassion to a trusted friend for sensation play (I LOVE flogging and violet wand), but I would laugh at someone if they tried to treat me like a slave. [:D] Ms Jana [sm=preen.gif]

LotusSong -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/13/2008 1:46:49 PM)
yup.. I'd submit to my long time slave.. but then.. it's just not in me. But if I HAD to pick someone..it would be him.

LadyPact -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/13/2008 2:37:53 PM)
Lifestyle-wise, no.

littlesarbonn -> RE: Dominance With No Room For Submission (1/13/2008 2:48:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: DianeB269 Tried to be a bottom once, it lasted 5 minutes.. Diane Same thing happened with me and sex. Oh wait, was I thinking out loud again???

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