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RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/13/2008 9:34:50 PM   
bornsynner


Posts: 44
Joined: 1/3/2008
Status: offline 		what an awesome read that was Statepalace... i too am a tomboy.. have been for as long as i can remember.. but i can imagine that the slow transformation you went thru was as equally pleasing for you as for him..good luck and hopefully if the one who captures me is into that he's as patient as yours is..

(in reply to Statepalace)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/13/2008 9:48:01 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		With Daddy it's entirely the other way around. I wear nothing but dresses, one piece usualy 99 percent of the time and he'd like to see me in more pants, more two pieces, something that flatters me more than the large t shirt style dresses I wear,  which I bought cause nothing else would fit, and now wear cause they're comfy and I don't like much else. something that requires somet hought, like does this top look good with this skirt, not just throw on and go. He's not going to make it a rule or enforce it or nothing, and I am happy he's not going to, cause I don't wish to change my style of comfort. Sometimes when it comes to taking care of my appearance I wish he was more like yes, that's nice keep that up, but most parts nah I don't wish to bother with a bunch of stuff.

I also hate clothes shopping cause it's stressful and depressing and negativly fucks with my emotions cause nothing fits, it's very hard for me to find things I like, or can afford. One dress alone can be 70 dollars or more. One pants suit IE pants and matching top can be 50 dollars or more. Bra's are a bitch to be fitted for also, cause one time she said I was a 48 DD but that was to small so she said I must be a 50 DD and that was to big, and on and on and on. It was enough to cause a semi serious emotional and mental melt down one time. I spent 2 hours looking and failing to find anything that fit right,  and I tried on tons of things I normally wouldn't even touch like silk blouses and skirts, and finally left the store in emotional melt down. Shopping ever since I can remember has been a huge trauma and a very unpleasant experince. Even when I was skinny I had large breasts so it made things that fit hard to find, now that I am a 30-34 in pants and tops need to be about 30 38 forget it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Statepalace

I am (was?) that tomboy sub.

Eight months ago I owned two dresses (one had never been worn) and wore dress slacks to work exclusively. Hair was in a bun for convenience, and makeup was limited to foundation if that. I hate jewelry. Jeans and tennis shoes were my standard clothing choices when not at work.

The transition was so incredibly gradual that there are times I still shake my head at the fact that I schedule shopping into my calendar without breaking out in hives.




< Message edited by YourhandMyAss -- 1/13/2008 9:52:16 PM >

(in reply to Statepalace)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/13/2008 9:50:03 PM   
Rayne58


Posts: 746
Joined: 2/22/2005
From: Sydney Australia
Status: offline 		I'm not one for girly stuff either.   My hair is short, like a pixie cut.  I wear t shirts, singlet tops, trackpants and jeans.  I wear flat shoes/sandals or trainers. 

I own a couple of dresses and a few skirts, but I rarely wear them.  I rarely wear makeup either - I just use a cleanser and moisturiser.  I do get dressed up if we're going somewhere fancy for dinner or something, but that's it.  I don't work outside the home so I don't need to get dressed for that.  My underwear is mainly cotton bikini panties and I hardly ever wear a bra, it's more comfy without especially in an Australian summer

I hate wearing high heels.  They hurt the balls of my feet and make my legs ache.  Sir loves to see me in heels and I do oblige if He wishes but I can't wait to take the damn things off   I have worn a dress because He wanted me to, and it wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be, but I'm much more comfy in my other clothes.  Besides I have a lot of trouble finding clothing that fits me properly - I have broad shoulders and narrow hips, a guy's figure (I had a TV on a personals site accuse me of being male going by the pic I had up of me facing away).

I cannot see the attraction in shopping for shopping's sake.  I buy clothes when I need them not because they're in fashion, and shoe shopping bores me.  I'd rather browse a bookshop (Sir despairs of the number of books I have!). 

(in reply to Statepalace)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/13/2008 9:51:45 PM   
Vampirate


Posts: 13
Joined: 1/12/2008
From: Oregon
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

quote:

ORIGINAL: Vampirate

Yea, I have a tip. I don't know if I'll really silly. But when/if she starts to wear spiked heels, a good way to ivoid from falling on yoru ass is, make sure you like step on the ground with your heel first and then toe.. A lot of people think they have to step down with all of your foot, and it'll keep you from falling. But actually stepping with the heel first will make sure it wont slip from underneith you... =P
..snip..


Unless you're like me and  walk on the backs/outsides of my heels (physical reasons for it,not by choice)... in that case, spiky heels + relatively smooth surface = serious falls


Hm.. I've gotten to the point of running in them.

(in reply to GreedyTop)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/13/2008 9:57:00 PM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		AMEN I will only shop for clothing when it's nessisary and it drives my mom nuts, cause she's a bit of a clothes horse, she'll get rid of beautiful outfits with plenty of life left to go and go shopping for more cause the original outfits were "last season." She wants me to care more about what's in style and fashionable, and I simply don't care. in  fact I think a lot of things that are " in fashion" are ugly.

I'll happily spend 300 or 400 dollars on crafts, or books, or sex toys, on trips to do kinky things, but please do not ask me to spend so much on clothing. it's an atrocity.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rayne58

I cannot see the attraction in shopping for shopping's sake.  I buy clothes when I need them not because they're in fashion, and shoe shopping bores me. 

I'd rather browse a bookshop (Sir despairs of the number of books I have!). 


< Message edited by YourhandMyAss -- 1/13/2008 10:16:26 PM >

(in reply to Rayne58)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/14/2008 7:31:52 AM   
liminalRapture


Posts: 181
Joined: 9/6/2007
Status: offline 		I'm sort of a girly-girl who eschews some of the girly-girl stuff much of the time, so a few ideas:

Be aware that there are trade-offs.  If she is doing girly-girl looks, she isn't as capable of long walks, running to catch a train, etc.  Chivalry is a great thing, and the more girly-girl she is, the more she needs it.  I literally don't feel as safe walking by myself when I'm in high heels.  Keep those things in mind.

DON'T plan long walks when she is wearing heels!!!!  Walk slower so she can keep up and be aware of things like sidewalk grates. 

At least in the beginning, put her in heels that make her taller than you.  I always try to stay at least a couple inches shorter than the man I'm with--it feels passive-aggressive to me to wear heels that make me taller.  If you want her in heels that make her taller than you, pick them out for her and tell her you want her in those specifically--don't say "go buy 4" heels" because she may think you don't realize it will make her taller.

Keep earrings light--I see older women with large holes in their ears, and it is really unattractive.  Don't ask her to sleep in long earrings.

Don't ask her to wear makeup on days with a lot of humidity or rain or snow.  I love how I look right when I put makeup on, but hate it when 1% migrates below my eyes.  Also, I would say, if she is wearing make-up, don't kiss her on the eyes.  Nothing like a sweet, tender, loving kiss on the eyes to make my eye makeup disappear quite quickly!

And yes, I would say, positive reinforcement.  Set requirements she try something, but not adopt it forever.  When my ex was trying to get me to do things, we had a 'one week' or 'one month' deal, where I'd try something for that amount of time, and then if I hated it, it would go away.  It was much easier to try new things knowing it wasn't a permanent commitment on my part.

_____________________________

"Ring the bells that can still ring. Forget your perfect offering. There's a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." Leonard Cohen.

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/14/2008 9:43:09 AM   
topcat


Posts: 1675
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Tidewater, VA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Statepalace
Self-image is such a large thing that I liken it to turning a freighter. It's not a speed boat, and won't handle like one. It took consistent reinforcement of every little thing I did that was even a baby step in the right direction. If for some reason my Dom and I were to part ways, I would continue to dress in a more feminine manner than I did before. Why? Because I like it now.

The most important part, I think, was that the entire time I felt led, not driven, to this goal.


Dear SP,
 
 
ooohh. he's goooood.
 
<golfclap>
 
Lawrence

_____________________________

-there is no remission without blood-

(in reply to Statepalace)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/14/2008 10:23:59 AM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		I am a tomboy that does not own a dress or a skirt, nor do I want too. I hate pantyhose and only wear thigh hi's occasionally when I am scening. My usual clothing is jeans and sneakers, I do wear jewelry and perfume, my hair is long and natural. Sometimes I do wear makeup and a nice suit when going out. I do wear nice underthings though. I am all about comfort and being Dominant, I am not changing my ways for anyone. However if your girl wishes you to change her ways, I would say doing it gradually is the best way. I think the advice about the high heels was golden, I cannot imagine walking in them myself. Everytime I put on a pair I feel like Im going to catch the heel on something and fall (actually had that happen in high school down a flight of steps) so its been 1 inch heels or less ever since.

Good luck,
~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to topcat)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/14/2008 2:38:20 PM   
erebus


Posts: 169
Joined: 1/15/2004
Status: offline 		An interesting topic, and I think a lot of fun to approach slowly and deliberately.

(in reply to Statepalace)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/14/2008 3:12:07 PM   
daddyncherry


Posts: 656
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		When i met my Daddy i was somewhere in the middle between tomboy and peusdo girly...i could sort of dress up but dressing up for me meant mostly black and boots...Alot of time i was in a baseball cap and flannels or some such...Really dressing up felt like drag to me and i had even joked about that.

i did wear make up most of the time though but i could also get kinda over relaxed with that idea as well...i went through periods where i was more "butch" (my terms) and have even dressed up in male drag once at a party for giggles (Topcat? Do you remember that night hehehehe)

As soon as i met my Daddy i knew that all of that would have to change....i bought my first skirt to wear on a date with him and then before the year was through 20 of the damn things had ended up in my closet....i went from wearing mostly boots to wedge sandals and such....A wardrobe that consisted mostly of black and hot pink gave way to one that can now only be described as easter egg colors....yellow, white, blue, aqua and pink....my black mostly gave way to grey coupled with pink or baby blue.

All of the sudden i got all of these hairclippy things and started to worry about my fingernails looking right...

To say i've changed would be an understatement...The way i did it, was i just did it....i knew that he would prefer it to the gothish, tomboy that i was and so i became for HIM...i am not super stylish lol, but he prefers comfortable and slutty looking so i sorta have those bases covered....Now, there have been times where i am feeling in a particularly "black" mood and i attempt to dress in my old style a bit and i find it almost impossible to go back....i put it on and somehow it just isn't right and i end up putting on something lighter and more pastel and POOF...i feel better.

P.S.....Now we are working on getting me be more comfortable in casual...and to wear a bit less makeup...to find a happy medium place....it is sooo not easy...i was kinda digging the whole thought of Stepford Wife/natalie Gulbis look i was working on.



< Message edited by daddyncherry -- 1/14/2008 3:13:50 PM >

_____________________________

Hugs,
cherry

Walking through life, and fear with a smile on my face.
Walking directly through the eye of the hurricane...and through to the other side..without fear....realizing everything will be okay. :)

being obedient 1day at a time

(in reply to Statepalace)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/14/2008 3:38:02 PM   
camille65


Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline 		I don't have pierced ears (or anything), I own one thing of eyeshadow and some chapstick. I've tried to walk in heels because I think they look lovely but the agony and unbalance simply aren't worth it. The label of tomboy doesn't exactly fit me but neither does girlygirl, I guess I fall somewhere in the middle because I own dresses and love skirts but usually wear jeans with flat shoes.My problem is that I don't know how, I don't know how to do the girly stuff and I never have. I don't understand the array of cosmetics and frankly I'm more than a bit intimidated by it all. Most that know me say I don't need make up but I would like to know how to properly apply it, I would like to feel at ease pulling things from my closet and putting together a look that, well is 'together'. Sometimes it seems like I missed the secret classes explaining how/when to curl the hair, how to pluck those eyebrows into the perfect arch etc. It was my biggest hangup going to Las Vegas for Christmas, the fear that I would stand out as someone who has never worn club wear. I don't really know what club wear is hehe so I'm sure I don't know how to wear it! One of my quiet fantasies has been for someone to transform me from grace in sneakers to graceful in heels. To understand what colors work for me, what hairstyle would be best. All that 'stuff' that seems so elusive and mysterious to me. I think it would be a fantastic experience to learn how to, and to be given the option of casual or casually elegant. Thankfully my dom says that I am beautiful even though I don't wear makeup, but sometimes I wonder if I would feel beautiful if only I knew how to do those girl things.

_____________________________


~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).




(in reply to topcat)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/14/2008 3:50:17 PM   
topcat


Posts: 1675
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Tidewater, VA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: daddyncherry

i did wear make up most of the time though but i could also get kinda over relaxed with that idea as well...i went through periods where i was more "butch" (my terms) and have even dressed up in male drag once at a party for giggles (Topcat? Do you remember that night hehehehe)


Midear G.-
 
I do, indeed. That is I remember it as long as the pictures never surface. If they do pop up, it wasn't me I wasn't there, Who are you, and Ididn't do it...
 
Stay warm,
Lawrence

_____________________________

-there is no remission without blood-

(in reply to daddyncherry)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/14/2008 4:17:36 PM   
daddyncherry


Posts: 656
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:



-there is no remission without blood-
quote:

ORIGINAL: topcat

quote:

ORIGINAL: daddyncherry

i did wear make up most of the time though but i could also get kinda over relaxed with that idea as well...i went through periods where i was more "butch" (my terms) and have even dressed up in male drag once at a party for giggles (Topcat? Do you remember that night hehehehe)


I do, indeed. That is I remember it as long as the pictures never surface. If they do pop up, it wasn't me I wasn't there, Who are you, and Ididn't do it...

Stay warm,
Lawrence


LMFAO...What pictures? Do i have pictures? Not the ones in the green box in the closet of my Daddy's office? Noooo there wasn't a camera that night at all LMAO...OMG that was such a fun fun night.

Edited to add: i actually know where some of those pics are, was looking at them the other day but some how some are missing from the group, but i have moved around a lot.




< Message edited by daddyncherry -- 1/14/2008 5:03:05 PM >

_____________________________

Hugs,
cherry

Walking through life, and fear with a smile on my face.
Walking directly through the eye of the hurricane...and through to the other side..without fear....realizing everything will be okay. :)

being obedient 1day at a time

(in reply to topcat)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/14/2008 4:28:27 PM   
wildangel3825


Posts: 15
Joined: 5/14/2006
Status: offline 		i am a huge girlie girl.  i live for makeup, high heels, dresses and purses.  i came from a family with 2 sisters.  My poor father lived with with so much estrogen.  i feel sorry for him now....  3 girls that wouldnt leave til we were all ready and we had one bathroom!  Our lives were consumed with shopping!  That being said....it doesnt happen overnight.  You cant put on 6 inch heels and walk like you have lived in them forever.  Buy heels that are 2 to 3 inches...the chunkier the heel..the easier they are. Let her walk in them around the house...gradually increase the time she wears them and height of her  heel.  Go to a good upscale store with makeup experts.  With my teenage daughter i gradually let her try makeup.  At first she was allowed base makeup to even out her skin tone, lip gloss and light mascara.  Eventually we added eye shadow, lip stick and eyeliner in that order.  Once she was sucessful with each step i let her add another.  This taught her the basics. She needs good advice, it could be frustrating to go spend money on cosmetics and come home and feel a failure simply because the colors werent correct.  In case you dont know....makeup is expensive.  Will save her time, money and frustration knowing what to buy. For her nails, there are nail shops on every corner.  A pedicure makes every woman feel great.  She can wear a french manicure..which is basicly clear if she doenst want color on them.  For her clothing...first go to an upscale store that will measure her for her bra size. A correct fit will make sure she is comfortable wearing them, i consider this a very important step and they provide the service for free. Sexy can and should be comfortable. You want to encourage her to continue.  i personally prefer push up bras for the sexy, slutty look. Ask girls for advice that have the look you like.  Take a trusted friend shopping.  She will not become a girlie girl overnight.  Make sure you get good advice from the experts, start with the basics and work your way up. Being a girlie girl is alot of work and can be costly.  Getting my nails and pedicure done every 2 weeks is $60.    If i was closer i would volunteer my services!!! Much to my dismay my daughter hates to shop!!! i love pleasing my Dom and being the best for him.  This includes my personal appearance.  i see it as one of the many ways i serve Him.  He loves me dressing up and wearing different looks.  Good luck!  If she wants advice on anything she can ask me!

(in reply to topcat)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Force Feminizing a Tomboy - 1/15/2008 1:49:15 PM   
robertolapiedra


Posts: 520
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Honsoku

I seem to draw types who lean toward tomboyish appearances. ......

Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas on this that they have gleaned from experience (beyond take it slow)? In the only other thread I was able to find on this, there was a suggestion to enroll her in a finishing school, which is an interesting idea.


Hello Honsonku. Most tomboys are young and grow out of it with time. You can't train a young woman to be more feminine. You may only have her "acting" feminine.

In my opinion this is in the personal growth department. You just cannot make a flower grow faster by pulling on it (training). Personally, I would do the opposite and have her go very far in the "boy" department... I guarantee you she will be more motivated to explore the feminine side of womanhood. I will let you figure out the "psychology" for yourself. RL.

(in reply to Honsoku)
Profile   Post #: 35
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