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RE: subs attracting subs - 1/15/2008 12:19:31 PM

Tigrita

Posts: 484
Joined: 8/16/2007
From: California
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Thanks for the reply laurel. Yeah, I fear it is just a fact of life. But I keep losing really good friends this way and it sucks, I wish there was a way to prevent it beyond just not opening up and getting close and enjoying myself with people.

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~ Tigrita

There is no right path, only the path you take.

Success is making life happen, versus just letting life happen to you.

"Many of the things I enjoy, I enjoy because I don't enjoy them." - Charlotte

(in reply to laurell3)

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Post #: 21

RE: subs attracting subs - 1/15/2008 12:29:04 PM

Tigrita

Posts: 484
Joined: 8/16/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: phear215

are the sub guys you attract usually unable to identify themselves? or are they in denial of being submissive? they probably are arrtracted to you not because they feel youre dominant, but more of they feel they have something in common with you and they cant identify what that is. that and with us guys psychological aspects dont usually have much to do with lust....lol. i guess you could take that as compliment?

This is a really good question. So, I have been described as 'putting out a lot of top energy' in my social interactions, and that is in part why I think these submissive guys come out of their shell with me, more than bonding over submissiveness. I don't feel submissive except with a very rare few people, real alpha male types.

One specific person that inspired this post is just the most perfect, sweet submissive man who would be a domme's dream come true, and I think he'd really, really enjoy a structured D/s relationship and I've been really, really tempted to clue him in on the scene, but I don't want to freak him out with all the whips and chains crap that is most prominent. That is another question I have, how to introduce someone to BDSM without freaking them out? I don't think he identifies with kink, but knows he wants a woman to take charge of him. He's not attracted to my submissiveness, he'd never seen it untill he saw Stephan whack me on the ass and I whimpered and batted my eyelashes at Stephan, and subbie friend said, in shock and confusion: "wow, that is the most feminine I've ever seen you!" (by feminine I think what he meant was submissive; soft and sweet and compliant).

_____________________________

~ Tigrita

There is no right path, only the path you take.

Success is making life happen, versus just letting life happen to you.

"Many of the things I enjoy, I enjoy because I don't enjoy them." - Charlotte

(in reply to phear215)

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Post #: 22

RE: subs attracting subs - 1/15/2008 12:39:14 PM

RCdc

Posts: 8674
Status: offline

I tend to think of it in this way.
If they cannot take the fact that you do not find them compatable (and I am of the mind you should be upfront about that) and if that causes them problems with your friendship - they really aren't good friends to begin with and not worth your time and worry? (But I can be hard hey)

the.dark.

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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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Post #: 23

RE: subs attracting subs - 1/15/2008 12:44:14 PM

Tigrita

Posts: 484
Joined: 8/16/2007
From: California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696
Do you feel unhappy with it?

Yeah I'm unhappy with it. It means I keep losing great friends who make me laugh so hard I cry, and I'm the only one who laughs that way at their jokes, so we both lose if that line gets crossed into romance when I just want them as a friend.

_____________________________

~ Tigrita

There is no right path, only the path you take.

Success is making life happen, versus just letting life happen to you.

"Many of the things I enjoy, I enjoy because I don't enjoy them." - Charlotte

(in reply to Justme696)

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Post #: 24

RE: subs attracting subs - 1/15/2008 12:47:37 PM

Justme696

Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Tigrita

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696
Do you feel unhappy with it?

Yeah I'm unhappy with it. It means I keep losing great friends who make me laugh so hard I cry, and I'm the only one who laughs that way at their jokes, so we both lose if that line gets crossed into romance when I just want them as a friend.

:( yes I know how it is to loose friends
(question was written with just "sub attracts sub"in mind..not the friends part)

(in reply to Tigrita)

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Post #: 25

RE: subs attracting subs - 1/15/2008 12:47:40 PM

Tigrita

Posts: 484
Joined: 8/16/2007
From: California
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Muttling, hang in there brother, I've got my fingers crossed for you too!

_____________________________

~ Tigrita

There is no right path, only the path you take.

Success is making life happen, versus just letting life happen to you.

"Many of the things I enjoy, I enjoy because I don't enjoy them." - Charlotte

(in reply to Muttling)

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Post #: 26