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Beauty? Out or in? - 8/30/2005 6:58:22 PM   
RiotGirl


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Being one of low self esteem and insecurity i tend to think alot of other ppl's beauty, but little of mine. (if any LOL). i notice that sometimes i feel very pretty and other times i feel ugly. Thinking about this, i noticed it depended on the attention i get. Getting "alot" of attention from men, made me feel pretty. When i didnt get alot of attention, i felt ugly. i think its why some of us, take great offense and insult to others remarks about us. Being called fat, or big nosed, or whatever. Some, could careless. Insult them, put them down, whatever and they'll just shrug you off. Thinking you are full of BS. Granted all of us can do either at different times, but its what we do the majority of the time. What i'm trying to explain is i think some of us find our beauty outside of us, while others find our beauty inside of us. (i think i am the first type) .

Just a thought i had, wanted to share, get others ppl's opionons, thoughts about it.

(no this isnt a topic on inside beauty vs a pretty face)



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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/30/2005 7:07:00 PM   
KatyLied


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Low self-esteeem makes us look at all of the bad and prevents us from acknowledging and accepting the good things about us, external and internal. Try to focus on those things that are good and true, that is the important stuff. And always strive to make the most of what you have.

Attention from men is meaningless unless it is genuine.

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/30/2005 7:20:48 PM   
greenie


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i find that if i don't focus on the things about my physical self that bother me and instead focus on my positive things i'm much happier. When i go to the dr.'s and they weigh me i ask not to be told my weight unless it's a health issue...that is what i see as my physical downfall. Instead i accentuate my positives, such as when i put on my makeup or do my hair, i'm taking my best features and bringing them out. As long as i'm not thinking about my negatives i forget about them. Now as a person i absolutely rock and i know this lol! i'm sweet, kind, generous, caring, loving, and as long as those things are being appreciated i continue to be so.

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/30/2005 7:28:17 PM   
RiotGirl


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Obviously all you say is true and i dont mean to be rude, but that was so not the intention of the post. Its not about low self esteem or insecurity or what to do about it. Or the reasons behind it. Those that find themselves beautiful, or ugly, at different times and why. Its a thought process.... follow it...

Where do you find your beauty, inside of you or outside of you?

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/30/2005 7:29:30 PM   
RiotGirl


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So you find yourself beautiful, no matter what the outside world has to say?

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/30/2005 9:27:52 PM   
sub4hire


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Everybody has down days. Some days we all look in the mirror and are not happy with what we see. Other days we are exhuberant.
You're not the only one, you're just the only one to bring it to the forefront.

Why are models rail thin? Low self esteem. Nothing is ever good enough yet to the rest of the world it is.

It's all how we look at ourselves, but you already know that.

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/30/2005 11:42:31 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


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quote:


Where do you find your beauty, inside of you or outside of you?
I try to acknowledge and maintain both, but value what's within more since everything about the outside changes with time, and there is always someone more beautiful, so no point in comparing. For me I find it's simply better to value the package that makes a person, not one or the other. M

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 12:29:52 AM   
tuttalila


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On those days I feel particularly good about myself or happy in general, this gets reflected by the outside world. Projection -- inside to outside.

Then there are more difficult days, where a sincere compliment can do wonders and make me perk up -- working from the outside in.

Last example -- when I receive really graphic compliments or someone comes on too strong , I often get quite tetchy and feel less attractive as a result...

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put out that lamp when thou wishest.
I shall know thy darkness and shall love it.

R.Tagore

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 3:25:36 AM   
ElektraUkM


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quote:

ORIGINAL: RiotGirl



(no this isnt a topic on inside beauty vs a pretty face)






I half expected it to be a joke topic about outies and innies (belly buttons?)

I shall leave now.

~ Elektra

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 6:11:54 AM   
RiotGirl


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LOL Elektra. You're right Sub4hire. (aye and your right) It is all how we look at it. mmmmm i just noticed that i go through spurts. Recently, i've gone through a looooooooong spurt of feeling very unattractive. Not that there is anything wrong with me, that i care to be bothered about. And its not that i care what others say really. i am who i am. i've had ppl point blankly tell me i'm ugly, others the opposite. They're words dont effect me. Cept i hate compliments. Thinking about it, i realised, i find my beauty from outside sources. For example in my old neighborhood, all the wives looked me funny as if i was going to try and steal their husbands. Not that i cared too. (thats not the point)

how many ppl here, look at themselves in the mirror and say "Gawd dang i'm gorgeous?" What makes you FEEL gorgeous? i suppose is the real question i've been trying to ask. So okay

When you look at yourself, what makes you feel gorgeous? (IE Where do you find your beauty, outside or in?)

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 6:35:06 AM   
Quivver


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Oh God Riot! Mirror Mirror on the wall . . . . somedays please make it a fun house Mirror.
You my dear child are yet blessed with *youth* if this is bothering you now, just give it a few more years! Visual creatures we are as sad as it is to say, and things like culture and advertising only leads us to judge us. Yikes..... sucks somedays. Beauty really is in the eye's of the beholder, every trip out we judge ourselfs against what we covet in another, usually the spots we have deemed *damaged*. (lord know's this ole broad has damaged alot over the years) yet i can still look in that damn Mirror on days and tell myself, i'm not bottom scrapings yet!

Q, who's stuck with what she's got and has to work with that! LOL


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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 6:47:47 AM   
RiotGirl


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LOL Quivver!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Actually YOUTH is failing me now... (moans and groans) i'm NOT 16 anymore (cries) i dun know what happened, twas just yesterday.. i swear.. atleast i was like 19 yesterday! <cries> i woke up this morning and i'm like ALMOST 26. i dun know what happened <shakes head> sniffle sniffle. How DID 10 years go by????????? God i couldnt even get ONE year to go by at the time.

quote:

every trip out we judge ourselfs against what we covet in another, usually the spots we have deemed *damaged*


Funny enough, i have been doing that ALOT lately. i'm not young and top of the line anymore = ((((( (cries)

LOL funny, i look in the mirror and think "gee i think my nose is growing bigger" Course i've been told multiple times that its just fun.. but i dunno.. ya never know.

I WANT MY BOOBIES BACK daggonit GRRRRRRRRRRRR 16 year old boobies RIGHT NOW. Heck i'd even go for 18 y/o ones!

Back to the OP.. beauty inside or out?

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 8:58:42 AM   
ProtagonistLily


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quote:

Being one of low self esteem and insecurity


There's a big surprise. Honey, if you want to wallow in that garbage, fine. But why spread your doom around here? Why don't you go find some help for yourself, instead of using this mantra of doom to get the attention you so crave?

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"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"
~Dr. Seuss~

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 9:15:45 AM   
Quivver


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Well Riot in my mind i'm still 17, the Mirror say's different.
But when it comes right down to it, i like me, and somedays
both the inside and outside match up pretty well.

Geez Lilly. . did somebody piddle in your Fruit Loops this morning?

sigh. . . . Q


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The problem with communication ... is the illusion that it has been accomplished. ~George Bernard Shaw

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 9:40:05 AM   
Mercnbeth


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quote:

Where do you find your beauty, inside of you or outside of you?


Both.

On the inside, this slave is loving, confident, artistic, loyal, obedient, dependable, positive, talented and forgiving.

On the outside, this slave has smooth, un-leathered(tanned) skin, long natural nails, healthy non-chemically treated red hair, gorgeous stretch marks from the 3 unmentionables, at least a ten inch difference between bust and waist and hips and waist, cute freckles sprinkled over arms, shoulders and face, an infectious smile and adorable green eyes.

but most of all , this slave finds her beauty in the loving look in Master's eyes, every time He looks at her.

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 10:22:18 AM   
CitizenCane


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quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily

quote:

Being one of low self esteem and insecurity


There's a big surprise. Honey, if you want to wallow in that garbage, fine. But why spread your doom around here? Why don't you go find some help for yourself, instead of using this mantra of doom to get the attention you so crave?


Hey, I've got an idea. Whydon't you punish her by not paying any attention to her at all? That'll show her.

Cane


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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 12:10:50 PM   
darkinshadows


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I rarely focus on the 'me'. It is more important how my behaviour reflects on my training and my husband and family.
I have been taught that I should only behave in a way I would like someone to behave towards me - what one gives, one receives.

Peace and Love


_____________________________


.dark.




...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 12:50:56 PM   
MsStressed


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My 3 greatest attributes ( at least in my eyes) have always been Big Boobs, beautiful blue eyes, long luxurious curly red hair........don't ya know as I've aged, the hair is thinning, the eyes are not as bright, and gravity sucks big time. So as I age, I am slowly looking at whats inside to make me feel pretty....... I guess I really am quite the catch............my other half enjoys me and thats all that matters. My biggest kick recently was a young guy thinking that I was in my late twenties....he made my year! Ladies look inside of yourselves that is where true beauty lies!
MsStressed

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 1:12:52 PM   
NakedOnMyChain


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There are days where I swear that something ugly and evil took residence in my body. They usually comply with the bad hair day standards, and I usually feel bloated right around then. No one avoids being down on themselves now and again. I feel very confident more often than not, but when I'm really feeling horrible, I take a few steps away from the mundane. I try to give myself some time with myself to find my own self worth again. I think about all the wonderful things I've done, the wonderful features (physical and otherwise) that I possess. I like to take a long, hot bath and remind myself that I most certainly AM worth it to snap myself out of a bad funk. Also, on those particular days I try to dress more attractively, with more attention to detail than I normally would...or buy a new, sexy outfit (doesn't have to be expensive, just has to make you feel good). Basically, I just do something that makes me feel good that I don't do on a normal day. It's rare that I come out of an experience like that without feeling better.

_____________________________

"Oh, it's torture, but I'm almost there."
~The Cure

"I ask for so little. Just fear me, love me, do as I say, and I will be your slave."
~The Labyrinth

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RE: Beauty? Out or in? - 8/31/2005 6:16:33 PM   
junecleaver


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It always makes me feel prettier when men give me attention. I think most people are like that.

But that's not my -only- source for that feeling. For the most part, I'm pretty happy with my looks though.

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"No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there's too much fraternizing with the enemy. "
--Henry A. Kissinger

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