BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (Full Version)

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MasterHardxdrive -> BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/22/2008 11:17:48 PM)

We have males and females here that are of cause dom/domme, sub, and a switch.
These terms are respected when  there is a relationship. When there is                  no relationship then we are all on  equal ground. When I have a conversation with a female sub. She is not my sub and I  don't treat her as one and don't  expect her to act that way as well.  Do you agree or disagree?



subtee -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 10:17:51 AM)

I do.

Here's what I've always wondered, how come in BDSM we "seek?" Everyone is seeking, "I wish you well in finding what you seek." "What I seek is a sadistic but fair, firm but understanding, masterly-Master-uber-domly-Dom to accept my gift of R/T, 24/7 submission and slap a collar on me so I can stop seeking..."



subtee -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 10:23:09 AM)

Sorry, that should have read, "I do agree with you."

I was too busy getting worked up about "seeking" terminology.

Tee hee.



yrstocollar -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 10:25:15 AM)

It doesn't matter what your orientation is. You should treat everyone with respect, as equals and behave with good manners. Only when there is some kind of agreement between both parties should you do anything different.



littlelostbunny -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 11:12:17 AM)

I completely agree.

I don't appreciate people who, within the first conversation, approach me with a domineering attitude and try to get me to submit to them. The ones who talk me as an equal usually end up as good acquaintences and friends.



thetammyjo -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 11:24:04 AM)

I have to say that my initial reaction to your post was "ick" cause I cannot for the life of me understand this trend with saying "males" and "females" instead of men and women.

Beyond that gut reaction of mine, I agree with the OP. We are people first, not our roles or our orientations.



xxblushesxx -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 11:27:25 AM)

Absolutely. And if more 'wannabe' dominants realized that, they probably wouldn't have to 'seek' so long.

~Christina



SubbieOnWheels -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 11:32:47 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee

I do.

Here's what I've always wondered, how come in BDSM we "seek?" Everyone is seeking, "I wish you well in finding what you seek." "What I seek is a sadistic but fair, firm but understanding, masterly-Master-uber-domly-Dom to accept my gift of R/T, 24/7 submission and slap a collar on me so I can stop seeking..."


Oh, now, that's too funny!!

And I agree.

With both of you.



Mercnbeth -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 11:41:27 AM)

disagree, because there is no one-true-way for all.
 
for some folks, submissive and Dominant are roles/orientations within their specific intimate relationship with another.
 
for other folks, submissive or Dominant is how they react to the world around them, regardless of relationship role/orientation.
 
some folks do both.



RCdc -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 11:43:18 AM)

what beth said.
 
the.dark.



Maya2001 -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 12:47:46 PM)

and I second what beth said



subtee -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 12:53:12 PM)

Whoops, I took the posted question as if I was to answer only in regard to myself, not for anyone else or the way it should be for everyone.



thetammyjo -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 12:55:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth

disagree, because there is no one-true-way for all.

for some folks, submissive and Dominant are roles/orientations within their specific intimate relationship with another.

for other folks, submissive or Dominant is how they react to the world around them, regardless of relationship role/orientation.

some folks do both.


I'd agree that personality wise this is quite true.

However I think the OP was about how we expect to be treated and how we treat others.

I may well have a dominant personality, goodness knows I don't try much and people turn to me to lead, but that does not mean that I expect they to or even that I want them to follow. Sometimes I just want to do things on my own. Even if I take on a leadership role I'd never be so arrogant as to think I have all the answers so I'd treat everyone respectfully and get some input before I made decisions.

I'd never treat someone as though they were my submissive or slave unless they actually were. I frankly don't appreciate treatment as generic superior either in return.



DommeKimberly -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 1:01:14 PM)

I am in agreement with MasterHardxdrive.  We are all people with different likes.  Unless we have built any type of relationship I would rather be treated and treat others as equals. But that is just my opinion.
Ok I said my part, I'm done.



lusciouslips19 -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 1:05:41 PM)

I agree.

"Down on your knees slut", from a wanna be Dom stranger will get a

"buzz off bozo" from me.



LordVelvet -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 1:13:53 PM)

I try to speak to all with respect until they show they don't deserve it. Be they Dom/Domme/sub/slave/switch or anything in between. If i have read a lot of posts from someone and I don't agree with them, I can still respect them, I can also make the call that I don't respect them enough to talk to them. Just My opinion.
LordVelvet



LaTigresse -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 1:28:02 PM)

Aside from the whole issue I have with what I see as a misuse of the word "respect" in this context, I think I am on the same page.



Archer -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 1:36:22 PM)

AS with any tactical situation it depends on the situation and the terrain. LOL

I treat everyone with a basic level of respect, how I show that respect differs from one person to the next and from one venue to another.





kallisto -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 3:15:39 PM)

I'm in agreement.  Being treated as equals is showing common courtesy.   Respect is earned, no matter what your relationship is with another person.   



RCdc -> RE: BDSM terms and the way we react to them. (1/23/2008 3:59:21 PM)

quote:

   Respect is earned, no matter what your relationship is with another person.   /snip


*runscreamingfromthebuilding*[sm=banghead.gif]
 
the.dark.



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