Crafting a BDSM relationship (Full Version)

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SimplyMichael -> Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 12:03:01 AM)

With all this talk of tools like safewords, negotiation, mentors and the rest, I thought I would post this about woodworking tools.
 
I have about 10 different hammers and mallets, not counting the half dozen or so for working metal.  I have five hammers starting with a 2 lb sledgehammer, a 16 oz. claw, a 12 oz. ball peen, a non marring brass hammer and for driving tacks, a delicate 3 1/2 oz. warrington hammer.  For mallets I also have five different ones, a light and a heavy dead blow rubber mallet, a rawhide mallet, a hornbeam carving mallet, and a general-purpose beechwood mallet.
 
I have all sorts of saws, a massive buck saw for felling trees, a few old style handsaws, one for ripping and a couple for crosscutting, a reversible backsaw, a veneer saw, a Japanese Ryobi, duzuki, and kugihiki, a fret saw, a jeweler’s saw, and of course all the various powered saws.
 
It is the same with chisels, I have sets for paring, chopping, mortising, short butt chisels, special purpose chisels like skew and dogleg chisels, sets dedicated to carving or for using on the lathe.  Rasps, files, drill bits, router bits, forstner bits and the list goes on, all in a myriad variety, many doing the same or similar tasks as other tools and implements.
 
I have, in some cases, upgraded my tools, others I have moved beyond or abandoned and in most cases have settled on a particular technique and tool that works for me on any given task.  My choices are different than others, my skills are different, what is and is not important to me is different than others.
 
There are craftsman who produce beautiful work with tools I have decided are worthless or inferior.  There are people with much nicer tools than I, who produce schlock.  The point is that a craftsman often uses different tools and techniques to achieve the same result and that my choices, while different, are not necessarily better or worse than another’s.  Finally, a craftsman’s goals are often different, some strive for elegance, others for utility, some to recreate some piece out of antiquity, others to push forward and create something new.
 
 
 Some choices are better than others, hammers don’t make good saws, and chisels don’t make good screwdrivers.  Shaping a piece of wood can be done in so many ways, chiseling, scraping, filing, planing or sanding but all result in the same form.  So, to judge a person’s craft, one must know a great deal about them and their goals, sometimes that judgment is easy, other times it is much harder.  I think that the relative happiness and or fulfillment of those involved isn’t a bad place to start rather than which tool they used to get there.




Asherdelampyr -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 12:23:36 AM)

Ok... so halfway through reading this I started thinking about wooden paddles... but I do think I see your point
Different stuff for everyone :P




spanklette -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 12:39:05 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

 I think that the relative happiness and or fulfillment of those involved isn’t a bad place to start rather than which tool they used to get there.


As Hamlet so aptly put it...there's the rub. I am often baffled by the things that people say that they want and what would make them happy...often ending in disaster. I see and understand your point, but I have become less and less inclined to believe people actually realize what they really want.
 
But, all in all...a grand post, and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy that I really just want and need very few things and the rest is just lagniappe.




robertolapiedra -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 1:32:54 AM)

Hello SimplyMichael. Great post. Uh...hand rubbed finish? wax?..................RL.




TreasureKY -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 3:08:09 AM)

That's very true, SimplyMichael, and I believe you're right.  I just sometimes wonder about those who firmly believe that with enough practice they can eventually craft a fine piece of furniture with nothing more than a sledge hammer... but can't understand why they keep getting only kindling.




Dari -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 5:25:19 AM)

Well, but then you have people who craft incredible art in wood using chainsaws.






BossyShoeBitch -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 5:52:02 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

With all this talk of tools like safewords, negotiation, mentors and the rest, I thought I would post this about woodworking tools.
 
I have about 10 different hammers and mallets, not counting the half dozen or so for working metal.  I have five hammers starting with a 2 lb sledgehammer, a 16 oz. claw, a 12 oz. ball peen, a non marring brass hammer and for driving tacks, a delicate 3 1/2 oz. warrington hammer.  For mallets I also have five different ones, a light and a heavy dead blow rubber mallet, a rawhide mallet, a hornbeam carving mallet, and a general-purpose beechwood mallet.
 
I have all sorts of saws, a massive buck saw for felling trees, a few old style handsaws, one for ripping and a couple for crosscutting, a reversible backsaw, a veneer saw, a Japanese Ryobi, duzuki, and kugihiki, a fret saw, a jeweler’s saw, and of course all the various powered saws.
 
It is the same with chisels, I have sets for paring, chopping, mortising, short butt chisels, special purpose chisels like skew and dogleg chisels, sets dedicated to carving or for using on the lathe.  Rasps, files, drill bits, router bits, forstner bits and the list goes on, all in a myriad variety, many doing the same or similar tasks as other tools and implements.
 
I have, in some cases, upgraded my tools, others I have moved beyond or abandoned and in most cases have settled on a particular technique and tool that works for me on any given task.  My choices are different than others, my skills are different, what is and is not important to me is different than others.
 
There are craftsman who produce beautiful work with tools I have decided are worthless or inferior.  There are people with much nicer tools than I, who produce schlock.  The point is that a craftsman often uses different tools and techniques to achieve the same result and that my choices, while different, are not necessarily better or worse than another’s.  Finally, a craftsman’s goals are often different, some strive for elegance, others for utility, some to recreate some piece out of antiquity, others to push forward and create something new.
 
 
 Some choices are better than others, hammers don’t make good saws, and chisels don’t make good screwdrivers.  Shaping a piece of wood can be done in so many ways, chiseling, scraping, filing, planing or sanding but all result in the same form.  So, to judge a person’s craft, one must know a great deal about them and their goals, sometimes that judgment is easy, other times it is much harder.  I think that the relative happiness and or fulfillment of those involved isn’t a bad place to start rather than which tool they used to get there.

[sm=applause.gif] Very well said...





DesFIP -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 7:12:15 AM)

Some of the 19 year old uberlordmasterofthe universe types make me think of the old saying "When all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail". You need to know what tool is best for which job, and finesse is always better than brute force. But the ability to correctly identify the problem and work from that to finding the right tool is always better than having only one tool and wondering why it didn't work again. Hammers can't ever be used to unscrew things, ever.




KatyLied -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 7:14:51 AM)

quote:

My choices are different than others, my skills are different, what is and is not important to me is different than others.


Thank you.  Sometimes I need to be reminded of this.




AquaticSub -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 7:27:56 AM)

Beautifully said.




lronitulstahp -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 7:33:41 AM)

nicely said...great imagery, lovely post...now if only i could be be more mature, and stop hearing Peter,Paul, and Mary every time i see the word "hammer"...




ghitaPVH -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 7:39:46 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

With all this talk of tools like safewords, negotiation, mentors and the rest, I thought I would post this about woodworking tools.
 
I have about 10 different hammers and mallets, not counting the half dozen or so for working metal.  I have five hammers starting with a 2 lb sledgehammer, a 16 oz. claw, a 12 oz. ball peen, a non marring brass hammer and for driving tacks, a delicate 3 1/2 oz. warrington hammer.  For mallets I also have five different ones, a light and a heavy dead blow rubber mallet, a rawhide mallet, a hornbeam carving mallet, and a general-purpose beechwood mallet.
 
I have all sorts of saws, a massive buck saw for felling trees, a few old style handsaws, one for ripping and a couple for crosscutting, a reversible backsaw, a veneer saw, a Japanese Ryobi, duzuki, and kugihiki, a fret saw, a jeweler’s saw, and of course all the various powered saws.
 
It is the same with chisels, I have sets for paring, chopping, mortising, short butt chisels, special purpose chisels like skew and dogleg chisels, sets dedicated to carving or for using on the lathe.  Rasps, files, drill bits, router bits, forstner bits and the list goes on, all in a myriad variety, many doing the same or similar tasks as other tools and implements.
 
I have, in some cases, upgraded my tools, others I have moved beyond or abandoned and in most cases have settled on a particular technique and tool that works for me on any given task.  My choices are different than others, my skills are different, what is and is not important to me is different than others.
 
There are craftsman who produce beautiful work with tools I have decided are worthless or inferior.  There are people with much nicer tools than I, who produce schlock.  The point is that a craftsman often uses different tools and techniques to achieve the same result and that my choices, while different, are not necessarily better or worse than another’s.  Finally, a craftsman’s goals are often different, some strive for elegance, others for utility, some to recreate some piece out of antiquity, others to push forward and create something new.
 
 
 Some choices are better than others, hammers don’t make good saws, and chisels don’t make good screwdrivers.  Shaping a piece of wood can be done in so many ways, chiseling, scraping, filing, planing or sanding but all result in the same form.  So, to judge a person’s craft, one must know a great deal about them and their goals, sometimes that judgment is easy, other times it is much harder.  I think that the relative happiness and or fulfillment of those involved isn’t a bad place to start rather than which tool they used to get there.

[sm=applause.gif] Very well said...




yer biased.




DominaRapport -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 7:39:53 AM)

As soon as I started reading I was reminded of the workshop full of tools and mess that no one ever seems to clean.[:'(] 

Well said. Using what you have available to the best of your knowledge and ability.




Leatherist -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 8:35:44 AM)

It takes finesse,patience and the ability to visualize to be a craftsman. Also the ability to be flexible enough to try new things with new materials.




CalifChick -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 8:58:37 AM)

So I'm the only shallow chick here who is so turned on by his list of tools that she couldn't even read the "meat" of the post at the end??  [sm=dance.gif]

Cali
(who knows if he had muttered DeWalt she would have seriously swooned)




Leatherist -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 9:24:32 AM)

Not at all. It's good to know that there are still those out there who get turned on by the idea of creation. [;)]




TreasureKY -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 10:07:11 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

So I'm the only shallow chick here who is so turned on by his list of tools that she couldn't even read the "meat" of the post at the end??  [sm=dance.gif]

Cali
(who knows if he had muttered DeWalt she would have seriously swooned)



lol... Not at all.  I have a very intimate relationship with tools.  [;)]




LaTigresse -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 11:22:01 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

So I'm the only shallow chick here who is so turned on by his list of tools that she couldn't even read the "meat" of the post at the end??  [sm=dance.gif]

Cali
(who knows if he had muttered DeWalt she would have seriously swooned)



No, the funny part was that I just came back from the lumber yard and was ogling a huge old shelving unit I am hauling home from here (work, in a very old building with lots of cool old stuff) to turn into a shelf/entertainment centre for my downstairs.

the inspiration...http://www.sundancecatalog.com/shopping/product/detailmain.jsp?itemID=9448&itemType=PRODUCT&iMainCat=8&iSubCat=64&iProductID=9448

Sorry for the hijack Michael........it's all the talk about tools and wood that gets me excited. What can I say, I am my father's daughter. Aside from the excitment about tools and wood. I love your post. It is something most of us need to remember when we disagree with someone else's "tools".






Jeffff -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 11:37:22 AM)

A poor craftsman blames his tools.. The craft lies in the soul of the craftsman. I have seen talented guitar players pick up, very poor quality instruments, and make them sing. the tone....is in the hands

Jeff




yrstocollar -> RE: Crafting a BDSM relationship (1/23/2008 11:50:52 AM)

Beautifully written SimplyMichael... as always...




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