New To This.... (Full Version)

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MistressKaali -> New To This.... (1/25/2008 3:34:20 PM)

I am new to dominating. I love doing it, but want to make sure I do it properly. How did everyone else learn?



AAkasha -> RE: New To This.... (1/25/2008 3:38:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressKaali

I am new to dominating. I love doing it, but want to make sure I do it properly. How did everyone else learn?


I did what my gut instincts told me to do. Domination is a lust.  It feeds something inside me. I had urges first, then later I learned what "S&m" was. I can't relate to it backwards -- ie, you like dominating, so you learn the acts that go into it.  So I am not sure what you mean. 

With regards to physical acts (strap on, whipping, caning, CBT, rope), I learned through a combination of trial and error (for the safer acts) and observation and mentorship (for the more severe acts). 

Akasha



BOUNTYHUNTER -> RE: New To This.... (1/25/2008 3:42:40 PM)

At a very young age I was Lucky enough to be taken under the guidance of several experienced mentors,some trial and error.take your learning process slow and relax it will come to you....bounty



LadyPact -> RE: New To This.... (1/25/2008 3:46:49 PM)

I learned the most from My first slave.  Along with him, I've had great mentors and teachers along the way.



MistressVnus -> RE: New To This.... (1/25/2008 3:59:22 PM)

I was an insatiable sponge.
I read everything from books, online forums and websites, and papers that submissives had written for the Dominants who were so kind to share them with me.
I went to munches and watched others play and conversed with those I found had something I wasnted to learn.
I learned from chatting with people online.
I quickly acquired mentors.  Both male and female.
I learned from my subs and play partners. (both lifestyle and professional)
I experienced the bottom for myself.

Not necessarily in that order as a lot of it was going on simultaneously.
If you ever have any questions or need advice, feel free to email me on CollarMe anytime and I will try to offer what I can!!
And, welcome to the lifestyle!!




Kana -> RE: New To This.... (1/25/2008 4:00:25 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I learned the most from My first slave.  Along with him, I've had great mentors and teachers along the way.



Great line and how very true.





TheLookingGirl -> RE: New To This.... (1/25/2008 4:01:17 PM)

I too had just the gut feeling of what to go off of. Anything else I've looked into or have just experimented.



petpete -> RE: New To This.... (1/25/2008 5:07:40 PM)

Easy... Find a potential candidate (plenty out there) and start experimenting.. What do You love to do?? Take your pick?? Is it surgery You feel like practising? see fior a subbie with a fetish for nurses and such relevant, etc.. Dont forget to handcuff and bound the muggy before You start on him.. If its something lighter You like that's easely done again.. There's a subbie for every type of use and every type of taste, all it takes is passion and dedication to pluck him or she out of the pack.. Go through the menu of goods.[;)]



jovonna -> RE: New To This.... (1/25/2008 8:22:13 PM)




In my local area--classes and training are offered.  Something new, but worthwhile for anyone new to the lifestyle.





MadameCris -> RE: New To This.... (1/26/2008 2:44:37 AM)

I am seeking out local Mistresses to learn from. Finally, i have screwed up my courage to go beyond the internet, and into my local community. The classes are a great idea too. I have heard we have them here in Portland as well. [image]http://www.collarchat.com/micons/m21.gif[/image]



petpete -> RE: New To This.... (1/26/2008 3:12:55 AM)

Congratulations on Your new status MC[;)]



MsCfromMelbourne -> RE: New To This.... (1/26/2008 3:58:05 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressKaali

I am new to dominating. I love doing it, but want to make sure I do it properly. How did everyone else learn?


http://www.collarchat.com/m_631409/mpage_1/key_search%252Cself/tm.htm#915248




MistressOfGa -> RE: New To This.... (1/26/2008 5:28:41 AM)

I learned flogging, caning, interrogation and cbt from my mother, who was one of the great Domina's of her time. Being a dominant woman came naturally to me, so there really wasn't anything to learn from that, other than to capture the flavor and reign in the spirit of who I was and who I was to become. I was like a wild horse waiting to be broken, and as each year passed and as I grew into what was to be my role, I learned to temper myself and quiet the beast that was within me. Today, I am who I am because of early extensive training and the ever watchful eyes of the woman who gave birth to me.
I wish you luck in your journey. It is the steps that get you where you want to be, and the wisdom to know which path to follow, all of which you will learn. Like the other's have said, trial and error.



undinerising -> RE: New To This.... (1/26/2008 12:26:50 PM)

That's why I joined these forums and a few others like them; I'm learning as I go, by trial and error and by observation.



LadyHugs -> RE: New To This.... (1/26/2008 1:21:46 PM)

Dear MistressKaali, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
I came up through the system where I was required to be a slave for a time.  I took that time to picture what I would want in my own form of submission and my 'best Master for me.'  I learned while I was in the slave position by watching every detail I could.  When I did my transfer to Master in Training, I had my past to draw from, as well as mentors and teachers.  I didn't stick to just one trainer, teacher and or mentor.  Everybody has something to teach.
I continue to learn to this very day and expect so, in the future.  Slaves teach in their own way, as I did and this needs to be acknowledged.
 
For me, I enjoy teaching.  I have mentored and trained many Dominants through the years.  And, in doing so; I ask the novice Dominant to picture themselves King/Queen for a day and how would they wish to be pampered and or served.  What authority figures in their life do they admire and wish to copy and or be like.  We, in general have individuals that inspire us and we have a sense of 'wishful thinking'; e.g. I wish to be more like HRH Princes Diana, or Lady Margaret Thatcher, etc.  What might be your desired epitaph?  How would you wish to be remembered?  In such questions, to define your Dominant style and desired reputation and the end goals to which would define your personal standards to happiness.
 
Although technical skills are extremely important--anybody can be a technical whip/cane master but, it requires more to be a Master/Mistress and or Dominant.  It really is a collection of many hats we wear in life and in leadership.  How you identify your Arch-type; e.g. Lady, Warrior, Guardian, Healer, Teacher, Defender of those in slavery, etc. Will help define your personal brand of Domination.
 
Just some thoughts.
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs



DominaRapport -> RE: New To This.... (1/26/2008 1:28:55 PM)

Follow your gut, your loins, or the evil little voice in your head you should not normally listen to. If something strikes you as interesting to do, do it!(Within common sense of course, I do not reccomend dipping your favorite sub bodily into molten chocolate, as appealing as it seems.)



KaramelGoddess -> RE: New To This.... (1/26/2008 7:41:28 PM)

Greetings,
 
Read as much as you can...books, forums, websites.
 
Experiment with a willing victim....errrr....partner.
 
Trust your instincts.
 
Be safe.
 
Best of luck to you!
 
~Kara



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