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ItalianSMistress -> RE: Importance of Physical Attraction? (1/28/2008 11:18:11 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: NewMaster86
As a sub/slave (which I am neither) how important is it to you to be attracted to your Dom/Master physically?
I only ask because I feel as though I've been judged alot on my appearance by what few sub's I've approached and its been really bothering me.
Physical Attraction is a strange thing. No one can help who they are attracted to, it just happens. If you could choose that, then you could also choose to be gay or straight. If you could choose that, then who would be attracted to children as a choice? I, personally, am a lesbian, I tend to prefer girls that are a little bigger than average, but not as big as I, with long dark hair. Almost every time I go into a bar, I can tell you, that the smallest blonde in that bar will come over and hit on Me. What can I do? Some of the time, the girl I have been drooling over all night is the local fag hag. Straight as a board, but loves to hang with gay males. What can I do? Just wait and someone I like will come around, I would much rather wait it out for someone I like, then be with someone I don’t.
That being said, in this type of relationship, I am more flexible about appearance. Case and point, I will take on a male. To look at a male, I would never be “attracted” to him. I obviously can tell what I find nicer looking than something else, but I don’t lust after a male like I would a female. My live in partner is very attractive, My friends all make comments all the time, and My daughters friends always have little crushes on him. In a way, its sad that I don’t feel attracted enough to him to love him the way he worships Me, but I can not control that. Now, I will not be as picky with a male or female slave then I would with a vanilla female partner, but, there will be ones I, of course, am not going to be attracted enough to play with. On the other side of that, I am a very big woman, and not every slave is going to want that. That is their innate feelings, not something they chose, and that is fine. They can not control theirs, any more than I can control Mine. Or anyone else. And, quite frankly, I don’t want to be with anyone that does not find Me attractive, who would? I still get a good amount of My mail coming from small blonde girls, lol, but I am more likely to answer them in this kind of relationship. Just like I would answer a male, that has the right mindset and interests. That is the most important in this kind of connection, to Me.
Now, I looked at your profile, and there are many problems, IMO, that could be a problem.
1. You are so new. In fact, not only is your name clear on that, but you have only been on this site for a month. You have to think logically about things. Do you have any idea how many things have to “click” for this type of relationship to work? You have to not only have a mutual attraction (at some level), but common interests, (vanilla and BDSM), the same type of goal (live in, or not, etc..) and have situations that allow this on both ends. One month is nothing, look how long some of these people have been around here. I have been here a year, and have met four or five slaves off here, not one of them has gone long term, and I think that is more common then finding someone right away, which happens, but not as often.
2. Your picture is three years old, and just a very up close face shot, in the dark, no less. You might want to take a better picture. Not trying to be a bitch, (that comes naturally), but if someone sent Me a pic, and said it was three years old, the first thing I would say would be, get a better pic.
3. What you did write in your profile is very negative and does not really say anything about you. First off, it makes you sound desperate to state:
“Would like to meet female submissives who won't frustrate me or waste my time. I don't have many other criteria outside of that.”
That just sounds awful, I would not even want to be with someone that did not have some kind of preference. If someone sent you a message, and said, “I messaged every Dom I saw, I don’t care who owns Me” Would you want to talk to them? I sure would not. I am very selective of who I train, and I expect they are too.
4. You are very young. 21 is young to claim to be a Master at anything. And, like stated above, you are new also. Those two together are very hard to get over. What other kinds of things have you been doing to try and gain some experience? And have you been looking for slaves that have experience? Some of them don’t like to “train” their Master. Also you were not able to say anything about what type of Master you are, or what type of slave you seek. Most likely because you don’t know, I would assume. If you don’t know what you have to offer, or what you are looking for, then how can someone match up with it?
5. Your journal, the tone of it is awful. Sure we all have rant days, but that seems to be all you do. Again,
“If I were looking for a 'dating' site they are in abundance, I don't need or want the same type of attitude here of all places, I thought this would be better than that.”
This makes it sound like you are only here thinking you might do better then in the “vanilla world”. Its about the same, those that have confidence and do well there, do well here. There is a type of person out there for everyones style. I have always been heavy, the biggest in the group most of the time, and yet, I always had dates, and a huge crowd of friends. Its all about how you behave and what kind of respect you demand. If you are whinny and weak, who could submit to you? Seriously. Your whole journal is like that.
This, of course, is only My opinion, and I am not a slave or a submissive, by any sense of the word.
Edited cuz somehow, it was all straight and black,,,,and I like blue and italic [;)]
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