Erectile Dysfunctonal (Full Version)

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Carmeldelight -> Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 4:28:56 PM)

On our first scene I found out that my Dom is Erectile Dysfunctional, so he beats the hell out of me because his cock will not stay hard. What should I do, should I leave the relationship or stay until he figures out it is not my fault? I do love him but I am tried of takening the blame for his lame cock. I did not become his pet for this type of abuse. What would you do??????




adoracat -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 4:34:42 PM)

james was my first master.  he never was able to maintain an erection for the 4 years we were together.

fallcon lost the ability to maintain an erection because of cancer that eventually took his life.

al and i spent a weekend testing that cialis does, indeed, work.  (Daddy knew about this weekend and approved.)

no, it is not your fault that he cannot maintain an erection.  it is also not your place to be his whipping-girl about this frustration unless you chose to be.  and no matter what, love will not make abuse go away...and his treating you to something you do not consent to is abuse.

time to think long and hard...if he isnt getting medical treatment for the underlying cause of the ED, its not going to go away.  yeah, occasionally there is an equipment failure, but that isnt what i'm talking about.  blaming you and beating you  because the little guy is on vacation is not the solution for the problem.

good luck to you.  this is a hard decision to make.

kitten




DelilahDeb -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 4:35:19 PM)

His problem is his problem. The first part of negotiation is making sure you both agree to whatever your scene is. Hand him a business card for an MD, a psych, a counselor... and don't agree to another scene until he gets treatment of one or more sorts. Anything else is just empowering an abusive relationship, not a healthy one.

Leaving is your choice.




Thorns82 -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 4:41:37 PM)

Without consent, beating someone is just abuse.




SirMIkeSD -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 4:49:50 PM)

This is not pointing the finger at you, but more details are needed.  I want to ask are you sure he is "beating the hell out of you" becasue of his cock or is he just a heavy top?  What makes you think he is taking his issue out on you?  I am not saying you are but could you be confussing the two.

Mike





Carmeldelight -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 5:42:56 PM)

He has told other peole I am the pet of his dreams, but Daddies cock will not stay hard for no more the one min. He wants to beat the hell out of me just because his cock is not stay hard. He has had a back operation and he is a sweet person aka (Diabetes ) with the two of these two illnesses Daddies cock does not work well, He is upset with me and he wants to make me his whiping post.




SirMIkeSD -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 5:49:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

He has told other peole I am the pet of his dreams, but Daddies cock will not stay hard for no more the one min. He wants to beat the hell out of me just because his cock is not stay hard. He has had a back operation and he is a sweet person aka (Diabetes ) with the two of these two illnesses Daddies cock does not work well, He is upset with me and he wants to make me his whiping post.


Thanks for the extra info but it still does not answer my question, when you are being beaten is he telling you it's because of his cock.  You have said he has told others that you are the pet of his dreams, could that be because he can take you further then you have been before.  I just don't see the connection between beating you and his cock not getting hard.

Mike




windchymes -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 6:26:20 PM)

Well, if you want to be beaten because his cock won't stay hard, stay.  If you don't, leave.  Seems pretty cut and dried to me.




OmegaG -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 6:30:05 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

On our first scene I found out that my Dom is Erectile Dysfunctional, so he beats the hell out of me because his cock will not stay hard. What should I do, should I leave the relationship or stay until he figures out it is not my fault? I do love him but I am tried of takening the blame for his lame cock. I did not become his pet for this type of abuse. What would you do??????


You've had one sceene and you love him?  I hope that you've been spending time doing something together for a while?

Personally, I don't like the tone in which you are addressing this problem, from what I understand it causes many men embarressment and I think that calling his cock "lane" isn't exactly loving or supportive.




laurell3 -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 6:34:17 PM)

Who has that magic 8ball link?  Something doesn't add up here.  How long have you been seeing him?  Did you agree to SM play?  Is he violating any of your negotiated limits?  Did you ask him to stop?  Safeword?  Talk to him about this?  How can we answer this question, obviously we have no idea whether you should leave or not.  What do you think you should do?




OmegaG -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 6:41:32 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

Who has that magic 8ball link?  Something doesn't add up here.  How long have you been seeing him?  Did you agree to SM play?  Is he violating any of your negotiated limits?  Did you ask him to stop?  Safeword?  Talk to him about this?  How can we answer this question, obviously we have no idea whether you should leave or not.  What do you think you should do?


especially when you read her profile and notice what was the first day she could have written it.




daddysliloneds -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 8:01:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

On our first scene I found out that my Dom is Erectile Dysfunctional, so he beats the hell out of me because his cock will not stay hard. What should I do, should I leave the relationship or stay until he figures out it is not my fault? I do love him but I am tried of takening the blame for his lame cock. I did not become his pet for this type of abuse. What would you do??????


i'd grow up before i tried passing this off as a legitimate question on a bdsm board; then again, people do it everyday on alt.com; perhaps you should wander on over there.




Carmeldelight -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 8:44:28 PM)

No we had been together for a while. Daddy did not touch me until two and a half months later. Yes we did do other things beside D/s. I am supportive of his problem of being Erectile Dysfunctional, but as you know a man has pride. When to cock does not work, men feel their world is over.




cautiousiasub -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 10:14:31 PM)

This sounds like an issue you need to bring up with him. I will agree with you in saying that ED is a very serious problem and that many men take it to heart, and I don't necessarily blame them. Bringing up his ED on a message board would likely upset him if he knew about it. I would suggest not calling it his lame cock when you have this conversation though.




breatheasone -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/30/2008 10:50:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

On our first scene I found out that my Dom is Erectile Dysfunctional, so he beats the hell out of me because his cock will not stay hard. What should I do, should I leave the relationship or stay until he figures out it is not my fault? I do love him but I am tried of takening the blame for his lame cock. I did not become his pet for this type of abuse. What would you do??????

Talk to him...tell him you, and he can visit the Dr together, and he can get the medicine he needs for this problem.... but make it clear that his actions so far have been way inappropriate....




batshalom -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/31/2008 3:57:55 AM)

So ... when his cock is "fixed" ... what is the next thing he'll beat you for? Weather? Stock market? Malarky.




came4U -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/31/2008 4:05:49 AM)

I'd walk, what good is a man without even the occasional boner.

NO man would ever blame me for his malfuntions of his own parts for more than 4 seconds of me sticking around. Love him all ya want, and don't complain or pack up n go. 




adoracat -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/31/2008 4:08:07 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Carmeldelight

No we had been together for a while. Daddy did not touch me until two and a half months later. Yes we did do other things beside D/s. I am supportive of his problem of being Erectile Dysfunctional, but as you know a man has pride. When to cock does not work, men feel their world is over.


dragonsnot.

some males think their world is over.  men come to deal with the fact that they have a body malfunction, and either get over it, or go to a doctor and get help.  they do NOT take the fact that the short man wont rise to the occasion and use it as an excuse to beat their partner.  period. 

beat their partner in a BDSM sense?  sure, why not.  as a punishment because the cock wont come to a stand?  no.  the two things are entirely different matters.




Carmeldelight -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/31/2008 5:02:05 AM)

He has not come to terms with the fact the General (penis) is not working. He faults me because, I crushed his word. He told me when we first met that; he would be too much man for me to handle but when it came time to perform his penis could not get up the whole week-end. I know there is a saying when a man brags on his cock; he is not good in bed. I should have taken that as a sign, but I do know that sex is not everything.  




venusinblu -> RE: Erectile Dysfunctonal (1/31/2008 5:13:10 AM)

If a man was beating me because his cock won't go up, and blaming me for it, I'd get the next bus home. 

I wondered if he thought that beating you would make him hard? Obviously not.

Anyway, if I were you, I'd be outta there - it all sounds very abusive and no-one appears to be getting any pleasure out of it.

Crushed his word? What does that mean?




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