Reasons for not answering after saying you'll answer ?

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Reasons for not answering after saying you'll answer ? - 9/5/2005 8:28:43 AM

frenchpet

Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
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Hello,

I sent an introduction to someone (a switch, which is why I'm posting here). As soon as she got my message she said she liked it and that she'll answer a bit later. Then nothing. She was connected many times since, but never replied. I mean, if after reading my profile she realized there was something wrong with me (It's not the country, I'll move next year and that point was in my first message), I would have understood if she had just told me. I could understand any reason. But I really can't understand why someone who from her profile seemed a very nice and interesting person would just not answer at all, especially after I sent a message asking her to just tell me why she's not answering. I mean, I wasn't exactly asking her to marry me, what's wrong with talking ? I feel like I'm missing something about female psychology here. Any idea ?

I guess I should just move on and meet someone else (which is what I'm trying to do ), but ... C'mon, is there anything so scary in my profile that you wouldn't talk to me, not even to say that I don't match what you're looking for or something like that ?

I tried to make it as honest as possible (strangely enough, it took me 3 attempts). Is that wrong ?

Thanks.

frenchpet, feeling like a battered dog
(btw...is that an expression in english ?)

< Message edited by frenchpet -- 9/5/2005 8:30:40 AM >

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RE: Reasons for not answering after saying you'll answer ? - 9/5/2005 8:43:30 AM

frenchpet

Posts: 587
Joined: 8/19/2005
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quote:

...especially after I sent a message asking her to just tell me why she's not answering.

I just reread myself and I want to be the first to say that it's totally stupid to ask someone to answer explaining why she's not answering. Well, to put it a bit less stupidly, I wanted her to tell me why she wouldn't start a conversation with me, which would have ended the conversation and would have probably taught me something useful.

oh well...

(in reply to frenchpet)

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RE: Reasons for not answering after saying you'll answer ? - 9/5/2005 10:53:06 AM

EmeraldSlave2

Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
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quote:

... C'mon, is there anything so scary in my profile that you wouldn't talk to me, not even to say that I don't match what you're looking for or something like that ? I tried to make it as honest as possible (strangely enough, it took me 3 attempts). Is that wrong ?

She probabl got busy or got too many emails and didn't think to go back. Or she found someone who really interested her and figured to just let it go. Think about if you had met her at a coffee shop and said she'd give you a call in a few days. There's very little invested here, and you can't put much into getting a lot of return from it.

If you're really curious, send another email saying "Hey, what's up? Are you still up to chatting?" and then let it go. Stop worrying "what did I do wrong?"

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RE: Reasons for not answering after saying you'll answer ? - 9/5/2005 11:48:30 AM

MstrssPassion

Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
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quote:

But I really can't understand why someone who from her profile seemed a very nice and interesting person would just not answer at all, especially after I sent a message asking her to just tell me why she's not answering.

... he sent a message asking what's up. If he had not, I agree that sending a note as a follow up would be the best course of action.

I would guess that the person you contacted really wasn't interested in following up with you. As to why she would say she would & didn't... who knows.

I know I have lost emails to persons that I wanted to follow up on. I am one the women on here that receives many emails each day. There is no folder system with the email program here to save posts that I would like to follow up on at a later time.

MstrssPassion

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)

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RE: Reasons for not answering after saying you'll answer ? - 9/5/2005 12:22:05 PM

frenchpet

Posts: 587
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Thanks for your answers, I appreciate.
Ah well, I'm picky, but not to the point I can't be interested in knowing other people

.
I can just tell myself that after carefully reading my profile, she realized I was too brainy for her and she got scared

...you know men need to be reassured !

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RE: Reasons for not answering after saying you'll answer ? - 9/5/2005 3:31:05 PM

Nuke718

Posts: 240
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Yo frenchpet,

FIrst of all it happens. Some women don't reply to an intitial message, and I let it go. I Know it bothers some people, but I figure not everywoman I am interested in will be interested in me.

It bothers me more when I have been talking to somebody (lets say two e-mails each direction) then nothing. I figure she doesn't know how to say she wasn't interested after all, or she made a mistake. And I understand, because when I am the one coming to that conclusion I hate saying it myself. But, becasue I hate not having closure I do say it.

So if you sent a follow up , just in case she lost her contact info, you have done all you can. Don't obsess. Talk to somebody else, and good luck man!

Nuke }:-

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RE: Reasons for not answering after saying you'll answer ? - 9/6/2005 2:04:31 AM

frenchpet

Posts: 587
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quote:

It bothers me more when I have been talking to somebody (lets say two e-mails each direction) then nothing. I figure she doesn't know how to say she wasn't interested after all, or she made a mistake. And I understand, because when I am the one coming to that conclusion I hate saying it myself. But, because I hate not having closure I do say it.

So if you sent a follow up , just in case she lost her contact info, you have done all you can. Don't obsess. Talk to somebody else, and good luck man!

Nuke }:-

Thanks.

(in reply to Nuke718)

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RE: Reasons for not answering after saying you'll answer ? - 9/6/2005 2:27:24 AM

nicky469

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