Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

I don't get it


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> I don't get it Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
I don't get it - 9/5/2005 10:14:36 AM   
pandora29


Posts: 22
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline 		I have been getting bombarded lately with Doms asking me if i am willing to switch.It doen't say anywhere in my profile that i'm interested or have even contemplated this,i have even gone as far as to sort my mail but every few days i get a message saying my bulk is full.Many of them are claiming if i did they would help me out financialy,i'm a Domme not a whore damnit!Can anyone give me some advice on how to deal with this please.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 10:20:39 AM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline 		That delete button is a fabulous thing, don't you think?

We haven't had that problem lately, mostly because we aren't the ideal of skinny and pretty ... but it has happened more than once in the past. Delete the messages, block them if they repeat - and move on. There will always be idiots out there - take a few to rant about it, then you'll feel better and can move on.

(in reply to pandora29)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 10:36:43 AM   
MsPurrmeow


Posts: 261
Joined: 10/30/2004
Status: offline 		I've had it happen, not only online, but in the real world, too. Too many chauvinists really got sucked into that "Every woman is just looking for the right Master" crap.

On the other hand, maybe they want to show interest, but they are stuck in "the only way to have relationship is M/s," which is bull, too, but it's a mindset that tends to be hard to break out of.

Just delete 'em. Get used to it, though. If you are attractive and strong, they will be interested, and the offers will come. I used to be really insulted, but now I just laugh. It's a form of compliment, in a completely screwed up way, but it's better to take it as such. As Domme, most of us want strong, attractive, charismatic subs, If we portray those characteristics, I almost have to give them kudos for trying. At least they are looking for the same thing I am.



(in reply to pandora29)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 10:54:44 AM   
MsSonnetMarwood


Posts: 1898
Joined: 2/10/2005
From: Eastern Shore, Maryland
Status: offline
quote:

I have been getting bombarded lately with Doms asking me if i am willing to switch.



I get this about as much as I get male doms wanting to sub to me "in private because no one can know".

Just toss them a "not interested" or ignore them, and move along.

_____________________________

~Ms. Sonnet Marwood~

Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bull somewhere before.

(in reply to pandora29)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 11:35:21 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		The delete key works well. Or else you can ask them if THEY are willing to switch!

Ms Purrmeow is right, it IS a half assed compliment. Acknowledge your hotness, and laugh!

:)Francine

(in reply to MsSonnetMarwood)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 12:05:14 PM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline 		I have not had that particular line from the identifying male doms for a long time now. I do get the equally irritating ones from these types of males that are either wanting to explore their submissive side or gush about how they have never had a female make them feel submissive until they saw my profile (eye roll).

I will comment that I have noticed that the closer it gets to the holiday season the more randy the guys seem to be about hooking up. Maybe its a genetic thing from our more primitive origins... the less often they will get out of the cave when weather turns cooler, the more they want company for long cold nights... LOL

MstrssPassion

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 2:11:01 PM   
GoddessDustyGold


Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

The delete key works well. Or else you can ask them if THEY are willing to switch!

Ms Purrmeow is right, it IS a half assed compliment. Acknowledge your hotness, and laugh!

:)Francine


*laffs* Exactly. I send a "Thank you for your interest but...". At times it can seem tiresome, but I just chalk it up to an attempt to grab a freebie, and move on. It is a kind of compliment, albeit a bit left-handed.
Now if I got to know a Male Dominant, we were good friends, and the right mood was there, I don't mind if he wants to "bottom" for a few hours. Because then we both now that it is just a scene and he is just bottoming. He is not ever really going to submit, the way I expect submission! And I am not interested in bottoming at all, ever, for any reason.

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom


(in reply to LadyHibiscus)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 5:48:51 PM   
QueenRah


Posts: 380
Joined: 6/3/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pandora29

I have been getting bombarded lately with Doms asking me if i am willing to switch.It doen't say anywhere in my profile that i'm interested or have even contemplated this...


I was once having a conversation, initially quite pleasant, with a swlf-styed dominant male at a munch, regarding the intellectual disparity between men and women. I support the belief that women are smarter, on the whole: we do not have to sacrifice social intelligence, emotional intelligence or reasoning for any other quality of discernment. Men, on the other hand, tend not to be capable of much more than one kind of intelligence - all others are sacrificed.

"What do you mean by that?" he asked, regarding a comment to that effect.

"The most intelligent man is a simpleton in comparison to any woman."

"Well, maybe I'll just spank you and see how smart you think you are, then."

"You just proved my point," was my reply. It was very rewarding to find him speechless and embarassed in front of others, when he thought he was going to embarass me.

A good, subtle (or not-so-subtle) zinger will generally shut the boneheads up, *then* the delete, *then* the block.

QueenRah

_____________________________

Life's too short to drink cheap booze!

(in reply to pandora29)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 5:56:10 PM   
QueenRah


Posts: 380
Joined: 6/3/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold


quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

... it IS a half assed compliment. Acknowledge your hotness, and laugh!

:)Francine


... It is a kind of compliment, albeit a bit left-handed.


Hey, now. Hey, now. Steady on. As a leftie I'm none too fond of seeing "half-assed" and "left-handed" confused as synonyms. (Besides, my left hand is pretty good at covering both cheeks, when a boy is small enough!)

QueenRah (aka "L'il Leftie) /:@]



_____________________________

Life's too short to drink cheap booze!

(in reply to GoddessDustyGold)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 6:18:34 PM   
MizSuz


Posts: 1881
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: pandora29

I have been getting bombarded lately with Doms asking me if i am willing to switch.It doen't say anywhere in my profile that i'm interested or have even contemplated this,i have even gone as far as to sort my mail but every few days i get a message saying my bulk is full.Many of them are claiming if i did they would help me out financialy,i'm a Domme not a whore damnit!Can anyone give me some advice on how to deal with this please.


I block by default anyone who emails me who has not respected my profile, no discussion. I don't even bother to answer, I just click the block sender button. It takes a while but eventually the habitual trolls get tired of making new profiles and leave you alone.

_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

(in reply to pandora29)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 6:21:43 PM   
MizSuz


Posts: 1881
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenRah


A good, subtle (or not-so-subtle) zinger will generally shut the boneheads up, *then* the delete, *then* the block.

QueenRah



In my experience it's prudent to skip the zinger (albeit self gratifying). Quite often the zinger is what the baffoon is trolling for to begin with. The power lies with not giving it any power.

Just a well learned lesson.

_____________________________

“The more you love, the more you can love—and the more intensely you love. Nor is there any limit on how many you can love. If a person had time enough, he could love all of that majority who are decent and just.”
- Robert Heinlein

(in reply to QueenRah)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: I don't get it - 9/5/2005 6:39:16 PM   
DrkAngl


Posts: 145
Joined: 4/9/2005
Status: offline 		I tend to get the Dom's wanting me to top them, go figure. Thought they were Dom's. LOL.

I've not got any wanting to try and convert me, YET. Had that happen a lot though in another chat place I used to go though.

Since I'm not over run with them and I do like to try to answer everyone if I can, I merely tell them thanks for the interest, but I'm not looking. Or just not interested, but thanks anyhow.

Then, there's always that wonderful delete button. :)

(in reply to MizSuz)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: I don't get it - 9/6/2005 12:53:49 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		I talked to one Dom who believed that "every Domme has a bit of sub in her." He felt that he could easily get a Domme to submit to him. I don't know if he'd ever tried, though.


(in reply to DrkAngl)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: I don't get it - 9/6/2005 5:25:17 AM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

I talked to one Dom who believed that "every Domme has a bit of sub in her." He felt that he could easily get a Domme to submit to him. I don't know if he'd ever tried, though.


If he believed that "he could easily get a Domme to submit to him," he hadn't tried it.

[laugh]

It is NICE to have fantasies


_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: I don't get it - 9/6/2005 5:41:25 AM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

I talked to one Dom who believed that "every Domme has a bit of sub in her." He felt that he could easily get a Domme to submit to him. I don't know if he'd ever tried, though.



I had one of those types engage in a bit of a debate with me at a party a couple of years ago.

He was convinced that the only power a woman had over a man was that he would respect the word no from a woman & not force his will upon her. He puffed up his chest & then continued that the male was the physically dominant gender & a woman just had no chance against him & because of this, she was submissive until she met the right Master.

"Oh really?!?" I stepped into the group conversing this & looked down at him, standing clearly 4 inches taller than he & most likely had a good 40 pounds on him as well ... I asked, "Would you like to go 2 out of 3 falls & winner gets to top, right up there... center stage?"

Needless to say he resigned his belief to not include all women in future conversations & to save face he said that what he meant was that 'most' women fell into this category.

Humph!! I know several women all of about 100 pounds & standing not much more than 5'5" that are pure tornadoes if you were to attempt to tangle with them.

Arrogance does not equal dominance.

MstrssPassion

(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: I don't get it - 9/6/2005 6:18:35 AM   
pandora29


Posts: 22
Joined: 8/19/2005
Status: offline 		I wanted to thank everyone for your replys,i have enjoyed them all.I have also taken your advice and began to use my delete and block buttons,i thought it would be rude but if they are i can be too lol.Oh and to QueenRah i did e-mail one Dom back and simply said"Now where in my profile does it say i have,will,or am tihnking about being a submissive.Now if you wish to be a sub to me then we can talk." then i deleted it.

(in reply to MstrssPassion)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: I don't get it - 9/6/2005 10:44:15 AM   
FTopinMichigan


Posts: 571
Joined: 7/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsPurrmeow

I've had it happen, not only online, but in the real world, too. Too many chauvinists really got sucked into that "Every woman is just looking for the right Master" crap.



Yes, I've seen and personally heard it happen all too often, but have to add, that in my own neck of the woods, there are more than a few dominant women that originally purported to be Dommes (even a few that worked as Pros) that are now full blown slave/submissives. This trend, that I've seen, of women playing both sides, or not realizing they're actually submissive, and only "play" at being dominant, is bad for those that are truly aware and confident in their dominance.

Men that see a trend happening, of women switching (or more appropirately, Dommes now being subs), will tend to take...or at least "try" to take liberties.

Sometimes, the actions of others help to feed the weak minded, to generalize about "all."

I personally enjoy a Dom that bottoms. I have no issue with him hiding that side of himself, knowing how other women don't take kindly to Doms bottoming, but I do expect him to be honest with me. And I'm not completely opposed to bottoming myself, with a lover, but it's for pure pleasure, and hardly considered being submissive, for either party. Bottoming is not something I seek, but I'm not opposed to enjoying it with one man, that I love.

Perhaps the Dom making contact is just stupid (which is more the case) or seeking to enjoy a quiet switch relationship with someone that may share his desires. I'm sure any correspondence would be better served with him being honest to start though, and not just stupid, and presumptuous.

All women do not bottom/sub, or desire to be slaves. Goes for all of us. (Sort of like the guys that think all Lesbians just haven't met the right man. Heck, I'm a heterosexual woman and I've not met the right man...should I go lesbian? HA!)

Perhaps it's a case of they feel it "doesn't hurt to ask"...but then they don't know me. lol When I get an Onliner that tells me what he wants to do to me...I tell him: "Yeah, you wanna spank me? Well, I wanna rip your balls off and stuff them in your mouth." They tend to go away quicker than if I hit the delete button, and they don't make contact again...go figure!

K

(in reply to MsPurrmeow)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: I don't get it - 9/6/2005 10:45:28 AM   
QueenRah


Posts: 380
Joined: 6/3/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MizSuz


quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenRah


A good, subtle (or not-so-subtle) zinger will generally shut the boneheads up, *then* the delete, *then* the block.

QueenRah



In my experience it's prudent to skip the zinger (albeit self gratifying). Quite often the zinger is what the baffoon is trolling for to begin with. The power lies with not giving it any power.

Just a well learned lesson.


And in *My* experience, dampening an idiot's overblown ego and unfounded sense of superiority is the more prudent path. Being neither a saint nor a martyr, I choose to stomp back, when my toes are crimped. It's working just fine for me, thank you. And thank you for your opinion.

QueenRah

_____________________________

Life's too short to drink cheap booze!

(in reply to MizSuz)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: I don't get it - 9/6/2005 3:19:21 PM   
GoddessDustyGold


Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: QueenRah


quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold

... It is a kind of compliment, albeit a bit left-handed.


Hey, now. Hey, now. Steady on. As a leftie I'm none too fond of seeing "half-assed" and "left-handed" confused as synonyms. (Besides, my left hand is pretty good at covering both cheeks, when a boy is small enough!)

QueenRah (aka "L'il Leftie) /:@]



*laffs in delight!* I am a leftie also, and it only means we are in our right minds!


< Message edited by GoddessDustyGold -- 9/6/2005 3:21:33 PM >

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom


(in reply to QueenRah)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: I don't get it - 9/6/2005 3:26:00 PM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I try hard to be ambidextrous!!


(in reply to GoddessDustyGold)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> I don't get it Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078