Talking to your Dom/Domme

Talking to your Dom/Domme (Full Version)

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ForeverOwned -> Talking to your Dom/Domme (2/5/2008 6:39:59 PM)
i have been doing a lot of reading of the boards before i joined and i noticed something. There are many submisssives who are afraid to talk to their Dominants. Does anyone know why this is? i can discuss anything with my husband before and after we were married as long as i did it with respect. So i'm wondering why so many people have trouble comminicating. i know that happens in all walks of life, not just D/s.

DiurnalVampire -> RE: Talking to your Dom/Domme (2/5/2008 6:47:42 PM)
PEople have trouble talking to their partners when they dont have enough trust yet to communicate openly. Fox never has to worry about talking to me, even if I dont agree with him I am not going to hold his opinion against him. That isnt true for all Dominants. There are some out there who do not like to hear the opinions of their subs, and its things like that that make people afraid to talk. It doesnt lend itself to a good working relationship, and leads to al sorts of problems, but it is unfortunately rather common. DV

TracyTaken -> RE: Talking to your Dom/Domme (2/5/2008 6:52:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ForeverOwned i have been doing a lot of reading of the boards before i joined and i noticed something. There are many submisssives who are afraid to talk to their Dominants. Does anyone know why this is? I have observed it too. My best guess: They are in an uncertain relationship (may never have even met). They are braving emotional territory that can be terribly potent. They live in a society that would ostracize them for their needs. They want/need validation - and they are, understandably, needy. They finally got the guts to make a connection, and they are afraid of being rejected.

ForeverOwned -> RE: Talking to your Dom/Domme (2/5/2008 6:54:57 PM)
i tend to agree with that. i also think that if a sub is not secure with her/his Dom then they would probably be afraid to speak up for fear of being released.

MasterFireMaam -> RE: Talking to your Dom/Domme (2/5/2008 7:01:34 PM)
People in general have trouble communicating. Add in a fear of displeasing and it gets worse...whether that fear is legitimate or not. Master Fire

Lashra -> RE: Talking to your Dom/Domme (2/5/2008 7:03:26 PM)
My malesub and I have open communication, he can speak whatever is on his mind as long is its done respectfully. When we first started down this path he had a hard time with that. He was very much afraid of saying something to upset me and that I might release him. It took time to work this out as he was new to the submissive path. Now he has gotten much better at speaking his mind and doing it respectfully. Communication and trust are key components to any relationship. ~Lashra

kallisto -> RE: Talking to your Dom/Domme (2/5/2008 7:10:49 PM)
Agree. Communication and trust at THE key components to any relationship.

LadyPact -> RE: Talking to your Dom/Domme (2/5/2008 7:13:14 PM)
My clip is encouraged to tell Me anything that is troubling him. It took him a little while to understand that. I do think it takes time to build trust, and that is part of it. Knowing that he wouldn't be released for his thoughts and opinions takes time to established. It's difficult, at times, for a sub to put aside that conflict between not agreeing with a Dominant, and displeasing them. Some will take that and translate it into an unbased fear. While unrealistic, it is still a fear until it's been disproven.

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