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MadameMarque -> RE: Erotic Bondage Photos: Hot men (2/18/2008 5:06:40 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ShaktiSama
quote:
ORIGINAL: MadameMarque
And by the way, do you other ladies ever get tired of people saying females aren't visual? In every other aspect of life, we're supposed to be the ones who care about the visual - art, fashion, design, decorating - while most men are thought to be indifferent. But then when it comes to this one thing, they think we're not stimulated sexually, by the visual?
[;)] Haven't you ever noticed that "Eye Contact Restrictions" are a common kink in BDSM? Any time you see a common kink, it always marks a Locus of Power among human beings. In this case, if you think about it carefully, who is allowed to look at who, and in what way they are permitted to look at you, is a huge issue of power and control in every human society.
This is why servants are never supposed to make eye contact with their masters, why eye contact is restricted in the military, and why women are supposed to have downcast eyes in the company of men, or to be blind to a man's visual appeal--looking is a form of power and agency.
Women are told in this society that we "aren't visual" in much the same way that we're told we "aren't strong", "aren't aggressive" and "aren't powerful". The right to look, and to appraise men in a sexual context, is a power that our society does NOT want us to exercise! [:D]
That's one of the reasons I enjoy being a photographer and a femme domme so much. Whether I'm interested in pursuing it or not--it's fun to look. [:)]
Well said. Who looks and who is looked at, who is the object of another's observation, surveillance, appraisal, another's direction, selection or rejection - this is a constant marker of the power dynamic.
It's very interesting to see how this plays out in film.
The female as the object of the gaze is so entrenched in our culture, it's difficult for people to notice.
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