Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

What Cities Are the best to live in...


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> What Cities Are the best to live in... Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/16/2008 10:46:32 PM   
marsneedswomen


Posts: 98
Joined: 9/22/2005
Status: offline
What cities (world) are the most kink friendly and why?

I'm currently looking for work and given circumstances I could be relocating. Given this change, I started wondering about what city is most tolerant, has an open and vibrant scene, and is conducive to being kinky. So it would be helpful if you can tell me why your city/home town the best place to be kinky.

thanks
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/16/2008 11:03:05 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
Pretty much all large cities have a BDSM element. Chicago, NY, Atlanta, San Fran...etc. etc.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to marsneedswomen)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/16/2008 11:14:43 PM   
marsneedswomen


Posts: 98
Joined: 9/22/2005
Status: offline
Perhaps I am asking the question the wrong way. How about what qualties of a city/town makes for a good and active scene?

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/16/2008 11:42:13 PM   
Reflectivesoul


Posts: 1777
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline
As far as I know BDSM is taboo everywhere, ok yes theres a more active public scene in say New York and in the UK than say here in ohio. I think the main goal if you're looking to relocate for work, would be to relocate and then look around for the local scene, just cause its not out in the public doesnt mean its not there somewhere.  Theres also no rule that if you move and there isnt a local scene that you cant poke around and start a small get together.
 
I would guess that the bigger the city and more diversly populated, the more " tolerant" it would be to alt lifestyles, but again at the same time I dont think the " flaunt" it idea is a very good one either....

_____________________________

ooooo..I bet THATS gonna leave a mark!!!!

Equal opportunity pisser on-er ... heh..

Gimme some crayons, I want color and I want it now DAMNIT!


(in reply to marsneedswomen)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/17/2008 12:36:56 AM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
sunny beach is all I need

BadOne

(in reply to Reflectivesoul)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/17/2008 12:45:05 AM   
MistressNoName


Posts: 664
Joined: 10/26/2006
Status: offline
It truly depends on the type of environment you're looking for. Every city's scene is different. For instance, what I've noticed about things here in NYC is yes, we've got so much to offer in terms of a very diverse population and a plethora of community groups to choose from. And while all that is great, the downside is that because there is so much to choose from, there is perhaps less of a feeling of a cohesive community...more cliches and less of an "one for all, all for one" feeling. Not that there isn't a sense of commonality amongst kinksters, but folks do tend to stay with "their own kind," as it were. But if what you're looking for is choice and diversity, NYC's got plenty.

MNN

_____________________________

aka Ms Petal - Check Me out on the Web.

(in reply to SailingBum)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/17/2008 12:51:37 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
I would say if the city has a tolerance for GLBT and non-Christian religions, you stand a good chance of being accepted and there being a community.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to marsneedswomen)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/17/2008 1:11:48 AM   
Paulsgirl


Posts: 249
Joined: 2/15/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: marsneedswomen

What cities (world) are the most kink friendly and why?

I'm currently looking for work and given circumstances I could be relocating. Given this change, I started wondering about what city is most tolerant, has an open and vibrant scene, and is conducive to being kinky. So it would be helpful if you can tell me why your city/home town the best place to be kinky.

thanks

Yes i know the city. It's called Taboo Island.......
where is it? Read on.....

This sounds like a case of 'the grass is greener on the other side of the fence'....but on Taboo island  well it also needs mowing, weeding, sowing.......
in other words it's not the town it's the relationships and what we need to do to  nurture them in bdsm/glbt which holds the 'scene' together.

You could find (via this miracle here called the internet), well you could find the 'one' or 'the many' on another continent.
Might i suggest you are looking at this from the wrong perspective? If you are going to re-locate do it for work, for life, for family but don't do it for kink........kinks may come and kinks may go but rooves over our heads?.....and the daily slog?.......i simply love love love the work i do and my family and yes i am collared but we all understand that it is my daily committments to keeping my family and a roof over our heads that come first.....


< Message edited by Paulsgirl -- 2/17/2008 1:13:25 AM >


_____________________________

Formerly Prinsexx

~There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.~
Anais Nin

(in reply to marsneedswomen)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/17/2008 8:53:14 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline
AZ, Seattle, and SF would be my choices if i was going to move....Maui is small but we have a really wonderful family here, no drama, and great folks...plus we have sea turtles and waterfalls.

_____________________________


Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."




(in reply to Paulsgirl)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/17/2008 9:03:02 AM   
MiladyElaine


Posts: 1086
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline
I would suggest choosing a state where your area of expertise is most desired, you would like the climate, and the pay was to your liking and THEN try to match kink by going to the BDSM directory and emailing the various groups for that state with your questions.

_____________________________

A crazy quilt is warm but oddly put together.

Milady

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/17/2008 2:14:54 PM   
ThunderRoad


Posts: 231
Joined: 3/15/2006
Status: offline
I will second that you should look for a city with a good GLBT and Poly attitude and established communities in those areas..  You'll definately find good groups then.  Chicago, SanFran, Austin, Boston, Seattle, Portland all come to mind immediately.  Generally, I think "blue states" will be more kink friendly, but the metros tend to be blue in most states even if the outlying areas are more red.

(in reply to MiladyElaine)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/17/2008 4:41:41 PM   
probablyknowme


Posts: 1875
Joined: 9/19/2007
Status: offline
The first place I always think of when I think of open lifestyle is San Francisco. (But hey be sure to wear flowers in your hair! ) But that's not to say that there aren't some lovely groups right here in the Bible Belt. I lovingly refer to Oklahoma as the buckle of the Bible Belt, and even here we have a very active and thriving BDSM community. I think that if you want to find the community, it is there. Heck, if there isn't a club already formed, you could always start one. There are kinksters in every state.



_____________________________

The human mind is like a TV set. When it goes blank, it's a good idea to turn off the sound.
-Anon.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/NewcomersOK/


(in reply to ThunderRoad)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/17/2008 4:53:38 PM   
Daddysredhead


Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline
The Washington, D.C. area has a pretty nice local scene.  People from VA and MD are all kind of in the mix and there are clubs to play and stores to buy all your kinky stuff.  However, you have to be careful in the burbs...  still an air of resistance there.

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut


(in reply to probablyknowme)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/17/2008 5:05:18 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum

sunny beach is all I need

BadOne


What he said.

Surfergy


_____________________________

"There is a fine line between clever and stupid"
David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


(in reply to SailingBum)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/18/2008 7:41:50 AM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MiladyElaine

I would suggest choosing a state where your area of expertise is most desired, you would like the climate, and the pay was to your liking and THEN try to match kink by going to the BDSM directory and emailing the various groups for that state with your questions.


i second this...it's a bitch trying to go to play parties when you're working the drive thru at McDonalds on friday and saturday nights....


_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to MiladyElaine)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/18/2008 7:58:21 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline
Forget the red and blue states. Find a purple one. Because they love you and you will love them. Reflectivesoul had the right ideal. Find one where you can find a job first unless your rich.

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/18/2008 8:04:28 AM   
ELUSIVE1


Posts: 536
Joined: 9/11/2005
Status: offline
I live just outside Charlotte NC...there is a very large active group in this area (CAPEX) but no public dungeon...you need to travel minimum of an hour to get to the closest public dungeon...I am currently visiting NYC, and I LOVE the scene here...public dungeons, active lifestyle groups...very very kink friendly place

_____________________________

"Words have no power to impress the mind without the exquisite horror of their reality"

*Poe

http://alt.com/blog/ELUSIVE1NC
http://users.adultspace.com/ELUSIVE1NC/


(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/18/2008 9:49:58 AM   
DarkDaddyZ


Posts: 805
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

I would say if the city has a tolerance for GLBT and non-Christian religions, you stand a good chance of being accepted and there being a community.

Master Fire


I agree with Master Fire to a point.  I have found that most places that has a GLBT community that is strong is usually kink friendly but that's not to say that all GLBT folk are kinky because a lot of them aren't and think we are sick fucks!

With that said though and based on three major cities I've lived in (Nashville, Atlanta, and San Francisco) and 3 I visit frequently (New York, Las Vegas and Washington DC) I notice that (with the exception of NY and DC-and that has just changed over the past 6 years) that the larger the city the more SEPARATED the "communities" are.

In Atlanta (unless things have changed and I admit it wasn't always like this) the heterosexual kinky community and the GLBT kinky community did many events together even while having separate events that catered to them.  While San Francisco is a huge community and things have changed to more inclusiveness, there is more self segregation than most places (exception San Jose).  When I talk to my queer leather friends many agree with me (as some don't as well as some hets) and they say that many come from small towns and just want to be by like minded queer people, that they don't have to mix with hets and many communities mix because there are less of them.  One example a friend gave me was to look at the African American culture of Atlanta, many move to Atlanta because it is considered the Black Mecca to be around black people and stick with their own kind.  The big kinky (and kind of commercial) BDSM event here, The Folsom Street Fair is mostly a gay event but as the years have gone on it has become more inclusive.  Dore Alley Fair (or what I call, Folsom Street Walk Through) is still pretty segregated except for the heavier players.

That's my take and my opinion.

Z-


_____________________________

"Flirting is part of the job description." DJ Jesus (Lucy Daughter Of The Devil)

Vanilla Official Music Page http://www.myspace.com/djzulu

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/18/2008 1:46:26 PM   
Viridana


Posts: 754
Status: offline
FR

You can walk around in fetishgear, in collar and in a leash in public without anyone bothering you here in Reykjavik.
Done it countless times and I've only gotten positive remarks for it, intellectual questions and many a kinky confessions. :P

(in reply to DarkDaddyZ)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What Cities Are the best to live in... - 2/18/2008 3:36:05 PM   
Wyrd


Posts: 109
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: Columbia, SC
Status: offline
My girls walk around with their collars on in public all the time, and this is in SC, the bible belt, most people won't bother you, an those that will are everywhere.


_____________________________

My Site

(in reply to Viridana)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1] 2   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> What Cities Are the best to live in... Page: [1] 2   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094