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Do I seek too much? - 2/17/2008 4:44:06 PM

daniel4xxx

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Joined: 10/2/2007
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I'm learning about my submissive nature... and want a connection with the person who wants who I am. I'm not speaking of love (never know) but I'd hope to be claimed by someone that does hold an affection or at least a personal possessiveness, that it's the person, rather than the "scene". How do I signal my availability to please someone on a more personal level. I hope this makes sense.

Thank you for reading me.

daniel

< Message edited by daniel4xxx -- 2/17/2008 4:46:29 PM >

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RE: Do I seek too much? - 2/17/2008 4:53:33 PM

DominaJayde

Posts: 110
Joined: 12/28/2007
From: Tasmania, Australia
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No, I wouldn't say you seek too much, you have a clear idea of what you want, and thats always a good thing, but I would caution about placing too much emphasis on the fact that you are open and available for more, as with all relationships good ones take time to grow, find someone that you have a connection with and then work on making it into more, the same as you would with a gf/bf.

DJ

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RE: Do I seek too much? - 2/18/2008 5:58:44 AM

thetammyjo

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Same advice that is almost always given to folks looking for partners.

Get involved in your local community -- local may mean you need to drive an hour in some places but meeting face-to-face, getting knowledge on your own, and getting a reputation for being serious about BDSM can never hurt you in the search for a partner.

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RE: Do I seek too much? - 2/18/2008 6:25:34 AM

MadameMarque

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Joined: 3/19/2005
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I think it's very important to find the one for whom you are irreplaceable. In person, your interest in knowing the person will show and you won't have to announce it.

To signal your interest in a more personal relationship on a profile, you've already put it well. Try commenting in a journal entry simply that, "to me, it's more the person than the scene."

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RE: Do I seek too much? - 2/18/2008 6:34:49 AM

MmeGigs

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Joined: 1/26/2008
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What you're talking about is the kind of thing that most dominant women say they want - a fellow who is a person and treats her like a person, and is interested in more than what he wants her to do to him. It's easy to signal this. When you contact dominant women, talk to them like they were people. Introduce yourself to them, tell them something about who you are, ask them something about themselves. Don't talk about kink, or at least not much. Focus on getting to know her as a person, and letting her get to know you.

I don't think that it would be a bad idea to just lay your cards on the table and let them know that you want to be more to your partner than something she does stuff to. I'd put that in my profile if I were you. There are ways to do that without coming off as needy. It's really about the value you put on yourself and what you feel you have to offer her - that you want to be someone she not only enjoys playing with but likes to have around. I think that it's something that the kind of dominant woman you are looking for would find very attractive. If nothing else, it will distinguish you from the many fellows who appear to want nothing from her other than a scene and seem to have no interest in who she is as a person.

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RE: Do I seek too much? - 2/18/2008 8:51:13 AM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
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No, you don't seek too much. You are well on your path with your profile.

The AZ community is one of spirit and commitment. I was very impressed with the folks down there during my travels as Ms World Leather. They run a wonderful event in Phoenix where I'd bet you might come across a sincere, involved and dedicated domina who has her head screwed on right -- http://www.southwestleather.org
There is also a wonderful group called APEX (Arizona Power Exchange) and they now run the Butchmann's Experience training program that many folks I know have participated in. In fact, Master Fire Maam is here on the boards and could share with you quite a bit about that. I believe she's residing down in AZ now.....and might be a great contact for you.

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RE: Do I seek too much? - 2/18/2008 9:31:32 AM

Dnomyar

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In a nutshell. Be yourself and treat people how you wish to be treated. It will take as long to find the person for you as it is supposed to. Not a minute sooner or later.

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RE: Do I seek too much? - 2/19/2008 10:36:30 AM

pixelslave

Posts: 1444
Joined: 8/19/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: daniel4xxx

I'm learning about my submissive nature... and want a connection with the person who wants who I am. I'm not speaking of love (never know) but I'd hope to be claimed by someone that does hold an affection or at least a personal possessiveness, that it's the person, rather than the "scene". How do I signal my availability to please someone on a more personal level. I hope this makes sense.

Thank you for reading me.

daniel

daniel,
It makes perfect sense to many, or at least it does to me!

For some of us, we need that connection in order to submit to one woman in particular; we can't submit to every woman who claims she's a dominant. Be true to yourself and confident in what you know you need and want. Just be yourself and take your time to get to know the women in your area. Eventually you'll find a woman who appreciates what you have to offer her and you'll discover she'll love you for who and what you are.

- pixel

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RE: Do I seek too much? - 2/19/2008 10:38:30 AM

faerytattoodgirl

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if love still existed in the 21st century...i'd say.... go for it...hope you find it...

but unfortunately love went the way of the 20th century.... POOF!

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RE: Do I seek too much? - 2/19/2008 10:56:42 AM

petpete

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dany boy, stop worrying if you seek too much or not and just let the seekers worry about what they may expect to find when your finally found...

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RE: Do I seek too much? - 2/19/2008 4:32:55 PM

DominaJayde

Posts: 110
Joined: 12/28/2007
From: Tasmania, Australia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: petpete

dany boy, stop worrying if you seek too much or not and just let the seekers worry about what they may expect to find when your finally found...

Lovely to see your pixels once again on the message boards, welcome back.

DJ

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letting go is a freedom in itself
http://fetishfandango.blogspot.com/

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