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RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/17/2008 10:12:07 PM

Gwynvyd

Posts: 4949
Status: offline

Gwynvyd,

Thank you for sharing; I often wonder what it is like from the D perspective of the situation. Especially since my owner told me, even before I started asking, making me cry is something that he plans to do.

You are quite welcome.

I find it to be a blessing.
I have cried myself as a bottom. It was a very moving experiance. Just thinking of the scene and emotions it produces in me makes me want to cry now... it was pretty emotionaly intense. I was not sure I would survive it emotionaly intact.. but I did. I am stonger because of it. ( It wasnt bad.. or abuse.. just very on the edge of things.. and intense. We both knew it was pushing our bounderies, and maybe what we both could withstand as people ) Would I place myself back into that situation? in a heart beat.

Gwyn

_____________________________

Self avowed Geek-Girl~
Come for the boobs, stay for the brains.

Be the kinda woman that when your feet hit the floor in the morning the Devil says "Oh shit, shes awake..."
~ Softandshy's "Shiney"

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 21

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/17/2008 10:13:45 PM

breatheasone

Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline

I have become Niagara Falls since I met my Master...seriously ...I'm like..WTF?? I have NEVER been this bad....and Master handles it like a champ LOL! There are those in my life that get REALLY angry when I cry so I learned not to. So now I can't explain why I seem so undone LOL.....Its just that when I am with Him...I can be me...I am free for those hours...or if I'm blessed, days we have together. Its like everything comes flooding out when I see Him... Its odd.....

_____________________________

Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
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(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 22

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 10:42:20 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

I've got to say, the first time I cried was like opening a flood gate. I then cried a lot however it being a couple of years since then, I rarely cry now, in scene or out. It's as though I had a ton of tears built up and now that the dam broke, there's only a small stream so don't need to much anymore.

He's got great shoulders for crying on and it doesn't faze him at all. He just checks in to see if they're good tears or bad.

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Post #: 23

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 10:45:38 AM

charmdpetKeira

Posts: 916
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

I actually desire to be pushed to the point of crying personally.

This statement makes me wonder how much I will want to do it after the first time. Is it something you like to do often? Is there more then one way to get there?

quote:

ChainedExistence,

You know..some days things just HURT

Yes; and some days, they hurt so good. :)

quote:

Briarrosethorne,

i had, up until last night, NEVER cried in session... then all of a sudden...i just started to cry... in the 5ish years i have been playing i have never had a release like that... Someone one said to me that sometimes crying is more of/a better release than an orgasm...and i now have to agree...

Wow, what timing huh? Happy that it went well for you.

quote:

Probablyknowme,

It was really that i absolutely had been pushed to my emotional and mental limit. But then I have said that I was either going to have the biggest orgasm of my life or cry...so it was a good thing.

I’m glad it was beneficial for you. :) I’m sure, now, what I am wanting will be for me as well. I think I wil just need to take the necessary, precautionary measures to make it go as smooth as possible.

quote:

MasterFireMaam,

Catharsis, or emotional release, happens all the time. My tribe practices spiritual SM...tust me...crying is very common. You need no other reason than you feel the need to do so.

I believe I am dealing with a conflict between the two; a need for release and fear of purging.

If I may ask; in your experience, is it ever done to focus on a specific aspect? If the aspect was incorporated as a perceived survival strategy, would it change the approach and how?

Thank you, everyone, for your help.

Best wishes,

k

_____________________________

Life is tough, that does not mean it isn't fair.

There is no wrong choice, only consequence.

(in reply to laurell3)

Post #: 24

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 10:52:20 AM

DaddyAndCarina

Posts: 1789
Joined: 2/8/2008
Status: offline

Until Master I had never cried during scene. I have because of emotional turmoil with some one I was with but the last time I was with him, I had punishment due me and there wasnt the factor of actual pain (yes I am pretty sure the belt hurt) But it was more abut the words he used prior

_____________________________

What Daddy wants ... Daddy GETS ~ Carina

I am not simply a label ~ I am simply what he created

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Post #: 25

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 10:57:59 AM

meticulousgirl

Posts: 969
Joined: 2/20/2007
Status: offline

it's probably an emotional release mentally for you...it's not bad, it's just your way of expressing what He's doing to you...

i do it all the time, it doesn't have to be painful for it to occur...

~meticulous~

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 26

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 11:03:09 AM

DiurnalVampire

Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

Fox has cried during sessions before. It is a major emotional releasefor him. It is not negative, but it can be scary because until he calms down enough to tel me what started him, I never know if its just emotional overload, or actual problems. So far, it has all been emotional.
People automatically assume tears are bad. They can be extreme joy, sadness, excitement, emotional overload.. many things.

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 27

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 11:12:20 AM

Reform

Posts: 151
Joined: 1/11/2008
Status: offline

I don't see anything wrong with crying during a scene or otherwise. I used to cry during our play because he didn't know what he was doing (we're very new at this) and I was just scared. We had what I consider our first real scene at a club on Sat, and I went into subspace for the first time. As he let me down I just started crying, a good cry. Everything was just so happy. He went to grab me a tissue, and someone came up to me to make sure I was alright. It's very easy to just see tears and think something is wrong. Sometimes tears are a good thing.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)

Post #: 28

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 11:12:44 AM

justheather

Posts: 1532
Joined: 10/4/2005
Status: offline

FR:
Sometimes I cry when Im getting a massage. It has to do with the emotional release of really letting go and being totally relaxed. I see it as a good thing, although I have to admit that if I dont know the therapist well Im always a little bit embarrassed.
If I cry during "a scene" it's definitely a good thing. I see it as another way for me to release tension, for one thing. But, most importantly, my Daddy likes making girls cry.

_____________________________

I want the scissors to be sharp
And the table perfectly level
When you cut me out of my life
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Post #: 29

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 11:37:57 AM

trueshadow

Posts: 388
Joined: 1/1/2005
Status: offline

I recently read an article of women crying in the workplace (which can be a real problem for everyone). It is the result of frustration much of the time apparently.

Not being a woman, I'm not sure why women cry though my sister was/is a master at crying to get what she wanted. Worked every time.

(in reply to justheather)

Post #: 30

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 12:20:59 PM

sublibrarian

Posts: 96
Joined: 12/23/2007
Status: offline

So far I haven't cried during a session, but I've fantasized about it - for the emotional release. Hopefully now that my prozac dose is lowered I'll actually be able to cry sometime. I have, however, cried after sex a few times over the years when I'm feeling really emotional - usually happens when I'm pre-menstrual. Can be embarassing if I'm not really close to the guy. But again, it's really just an intense emotional release.

(in reply to charmdpetKeira)

Post #: 31

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 6:20:17 PM

wordstoponder

Posts: 56
Joined: 2/3/2008
From: New Hampshire
Status: offline

There are many reasons why I have cried during or after a scene/session (or just plain ol' regular sex, for that matter). Just the other day I cried because something had touched a sore part of my soul that I am slowly beginning to acknowledge. Last week I cried because I was in pain and I was scared. The crop stung more than I remembered it, and someone new (who I had just met) was weilding it. I've also cried after a very intense orgasm.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 32

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/18/2008 8:34:31 PM

girlserveshim

Posts: 7
Joined: 12/17/2007
Status: offline

Catharsis, yes. I sometimes request it. Master...the caring sadist that he is...is usually more than happy to indulge. :-)

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 33

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/19/2008 1:10:20 AM

charmdpetKeira

Posts: 916
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Gwynvyd

Would I place myself back into that situation? in a heart beat.

Very comforting to read.

quote:

Breatheasone,

Its like everything comes flooding out when I see Him... Its odd.....

*smiles* Sounds like feeling safe.

quote:

DesFIP,

It's as though I had a ton of tears built up and now that the dam broke, there's only a small stream so don't need to much anymore.

I can relate to that. This particular need to cry feels like wanting to have an all out break down; with an agenda. I guess the agenda is to heel, only a part of me is concerned it will drowned in the flood, or maybe more like, it will evaporate with the tears.

The mention of a small stream, reminds me of the bitter-sweet kind of crying; when there are tears without sound. Mmmmmmmm bitter-sweet…

quote:

He's got great shoulders for crying on and it doesn't faze him at all. He just checks in to see if they're good tears or bad.

Sounds delightful. :) *basks in the warm fuzzy feeling from DesFIP’s words*

quote:

DaddyAndCarina,

Until Master I had never cried during scene. I have because of emotional turmoil with some one I was with but the last time I was with him, I had punishment due me and there wasnt the factor of actual pain (yes I am pretty sure the belt hurt) But it was more abut the words he used prior

I am guessing/hoping; the first mentioned was a different experience then the second. The second would be extremely tough. Even more so, since I tend to punish myself, to a far greater extent then what is intended.

Thank you for your thoughts.

k

_____________________________

Life is tough, that does not mean it isn't fair.

There is no wrong choice, only consequence.

(in reply to Gwynvyd)

Post #: 34

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/19/2008 4:12:43 AM

petpete

Posts: 677
Joined: 7/6/2007
Status: offline

i get to cry allot!!! (when i'm peeling onions)

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Max: And loving it!

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Post #: 35

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/19/2008 4:44:30 AM

charmdpetKeira

Posts: 916
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: petpete

i get to cry allot!!! (when i'm peeling onions)

Well, I was wondering if any guys would pipe-up, about themselves that is; and a pet no less. :)

Sooooo, Pete, who cries for onions. Is this something you enjoy doing? Do you do it a lot, a lot? When you’re doing it, is it of your own free will? And, perhaps most important of all; how do you feel about the onions when your done?

Curious minds and such…

k

_____________________________

Life is tough, that does not mean it isn't fair.

There is no wrong choice, only consequence.

(in reply to petpete)

Post #: 36

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/19/2008 6:49:22 AM

mhawk

Posts: 509
Joined: 11/5/2007
From: Washington
Status: offline

crying during a session hmmm....

well for me it is an ultimate release.there are times i try to fight the tears as my Mistress is flogging me but then there are times it jsut comes out and there is nothing i can do to stop that.

for Her,as She has told me on many occasssions. She likes to see me cry occassionally.to Her that is the tell tale signs of my surrender to Her.

crying can be a sort of catharsis.

(in reply to charmdpetKeira)

Post #: 37

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/19/2008 10:02:27 AM

petpete

Posts: 677
Joined: 7/6/2007
Status: offline

i'll answer your question straight after the match and once i know the result of the match that's about to begin!! Its CHAMPIONS LEAGUE time folks and my beloved reds of Pireaus are up against the blues of the Russian mafia's !! i hate to be crying at the end of the match!!

_____________________________

Chief: Max, you realize you'll be facing every kind of danger imaginable.
Max: And loving it!

(in reply to mhawk)

Post #: 38

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/20/2008 9:59:02 AM

ThistleDown

Posts: 51
Joined: 1/15/2008
Status: offline

quote:

I do have some reservations on it happening this way. So far (not in sessions), crying from pain is not from the pain it’s self; it’s because I start to think I’m being harmed.

Charmd~

I was really surprised to see this, I do the same thing and I always thought I was just too easily set to tears.
I have started to cry twice and stopped myself both times. I don't remember which happened first but in one case, it was just a mix of surprise and pain and I got over it pretty quick (with the help of much cuddling from my Master). In that case, I didn't want to cry because I felt it was unnecessary since I knew I was ok and I have a tendency to just go forever so I tried to stop it and move on before I let myself get out of hand.

The other time, however, was during a flogging. Master had put nipple clamps on me and was beating me, which was all fine and dandy right up until he started beating my breasts over top of the clamps. I don't remember what caused him to stop (i should have used my safeword but I was so freaked out, speaking would have been a miracle) but he asked me if I was ok and for some reason that made me afraid to cry (having a blindfold on helped me not to). Somehow, it felt like I would be betraying him or something... I guess by not being able to handle the pain that I knew he wanted to inflict.
It's a topic we've been discussing (why I hate the nipple clamps & beating so much - he loves it!) and I've always described it as "it hurt so much I wanted to cry" but what you said is more accurate.
I've been making connections between similar events and not been able to see what that connection was until now. Pain makes me cry when I think I'm being harmed. It makes me cry when it feels like I'm being harmed, even if I know I'm not.

I'm wondering, is that sort of pain more tolerable if you let yourself cry? And have you ever done an activity more than once even though the first time it made you feel this way? If so, was it easier to handle the next time around?

I thought also, it might be scary because I have the desire to cry in scene too, but I feel like the only way that will happen is if something is going wrong and I don't want a scene to go wrong, that's scary. At least to me. Maybe you have that same connection in your mind? That if you're crying something must be going wrong.

~puppy

(in reply to charmdpetKeira)

Post #: 39

RE: What Are You Crying For? - 2/20/2008 2:37:01 PM

subsnow

Posts: 152
Joined: 11/26/2006
Status: offline

I have wanted to cry so many times during a session. I would often get frustrated when I couldn't cry. I've asked my Daddy to make me cry a couple of times. I definatly think it's for emotional release. This is sad but I cried so much as a kid that I wonder if I just want to feel something familiar. I definatly think that my wanting to cry is some sort of an attempt at trying to heal an issue from my past. Who knows? Daddy says that he doesn't like to see me cry though. When I do cry, all he wants to do is comfort me. It's such a wonderful feeling to be crying in Daddy's arms. He hugs me very tightly and tells me he loves me. It's like I'm a child again.

< Message edited by subsnow -- 2/20/2008 2:42:13 PM >

(in reply to charmdpetKeira)

Post #: 40

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