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Being a Mistress - 9/15/2005 10:18:27 AM   
Fivedolarbill


Posts: 6
Joined: 8/27/2005
From: Rex, GA
Status: offline 		I need help and advise about being a Mistress. I do not know if I need to learn about being a Submissive inorder to become a Dominant. I have met four Subs and have daily conversations. I first informed them of the fact that I am very new to the lifestyle. They all have agreed to continue chatting. However, they ask for instructions and I don't have a clue of what to say or tell them what to do. Would reading get me started? I do not have much of an imagination, and that is a problem, as well. HELP PLEASE!
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Being a Mistress - 9/15/2005 10:36:55 AM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline 		The "submissive first" route works for some but not for all. It certainly isn't a requirement.

First, I'd suggest you read some nonfiction books. Some of the best for dominant women are The Sexually Dominant Woman by Lady Green and The Mistress Manual, both are published by Greenery Press www.greenerypress.com

There are also more general books like my own The Loving Dominant, SM101 or Screw the Roses.

I'd also recommend you join groups near you so you can see how different people manage their dominance. A good source for groups is www.darkheart.com/usalist.html


_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to Fivedolarbill)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Being a Mistress - 9/15/2005 11:26:58 AM   
iamdownonmyknees


Posts: 93
Joined: 4/10/2005
From: Durham NC USA
Status: offline 		The woman in my life has never been a submissive so I don't think that is needed.

Aside from a couple of John Warren's books she liked the titles by Claudia Varrin quite a bit.

Best of luck,
Richard

_____________________________

Down On My Knees & Sensual Sadist

(in reply to Fivedolarbill)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Being a Mistress - 9/15/2005 4:18:10 PM   
PetTeacher


Posts: 57
Joined: 11/5/2004
Status: offline 		When you are reading the books such as JohnWarren as mentioned, you might want to keep the following web site handy to understand the jargon. Below is the one I have, someone else may have one better (be sure to turn your pop up blocker on)

http://www.saviodsilva.net/r/ss97.htm

_____________________________

"The heart of another is a dark forest, always,.... no matter how close it has been to one's own.",

(in reply to JohnWarren)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Being a Mistress - 9/16/2005 6:02:50 AM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Fivedolarbill
They all have agreed to continue chatting. However, they ask for instructions and I don't have a clue of what to say or tell them what to do.


I think the main point to be made here is what do you want to do with these people you are speaking with???? You are the dominant, correct???
Do you want to read up on kinky suggestions just so you can type them into cyber space & get these naughty little boys off?

Think about it for a minute.

You are new & you wish to enter this as a dominant. This is the time for introspection, if you are doing this as a lifestyle choice. If this is a choice that you wish to apply to your real life, take time to figure out YOU rather than jump in & attempt to play a role of your choice. Take some time to speak with persons outside of cyber play & this will greatly add to your self-growth & awareness.

On the other hand... if just being a good cyber player is all you wish to do with dominance & submission there are hundreds of thousands of web pages filled with fantasy ramblings. Google it.


MstrssPassion

(in reply to Fivedolarbill)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Being a Mistress - 9/17/2005 8:29:11 AM   
sudja


Posts: 155
Joined: 2/8/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion


quote:

ORIGINAL: Fivedolarbill
They all have agreed to continue chatting. However, they ask for instructions and I don't have a clue of what to say or tell them what to do.


I think the main point to be made here is what do you want to do with these people you are speaking with???? You are the dominant, correct???
Do you want to read up on kinky suggestions just so you can type them into cyber space & get these naughty little boys off?




Took the words right out of my fingers.

I was about to say - it's not about what books tell you to do, or you see others doing - it's about what would make YOU happy to see, to have a submissive to for you, to you, at your bidding.

If you need to be told what would make you happy to have somebody to do/for you at your behest then I wonder what you believe being "Dominant," at least in a BDSM context, means to you.

sudja

(in reply to MstrssPassion)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Being a Mistress - 9/17/2005 10:45:39 AM   
Misstoyou


Posts: 1149
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion


quote:

ORIGINAL: Fivedolarbill
They all have agreed to continue chatting. However, they ask for instructions and I don't have a clue of what to say or tell them what to do.


I think the main point to be made here is what do you want to do with these people you are speaking with???? ...

If this is a choice that you wish to apply to your real life, take time to figure out YOU rather than jump in & attempt to play a role of your choice. ...

MstrssPassion




Precisely. MstrssPassion is dead on. You have to know what you want first. You can always pick up technique.

When I joined here the first time (as an on-line personals novice, though not a lifestyle novice), I was a butterfly, quickly jumping from conversing with one sub to another as soon as they got to the "instructions" part. I couldn't think of anything I wanted them to do "for me" online.

Finally, a very nice submissive in Sweden (! - Yes, I was talking to *everybody*. I can't help being friendly. lol) asked me what I was looking for on here. I thought, "Beyond entertainment? Damned if I know."

So I took a break, and figured that part out. I still get entertained on here, I still don't have any *instructions* for subs, but I also found my pet.

_____________________________

~ Miss Marie

a.k.a. "mean Lady"


(in reply to MstrssPassion)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Being a Mistress - 9/20/2005 11:08:43 AM   
Fivedolarbill


Posts: 6
Joined: 8/27/2005
From: Rex, GA
Status: offline 		Thanks for the many suggestions. My work is cut out for me....and the quest begans

(in reply to Misstoyou)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Being a Mistress - 9/20/2005 2:45:14 PM   
lonewolf05


Posts: 830
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Thanks for the many suggestions. My work is cut out for me....and the quest begans

=======

yes the work is ready for You........and if You have the stamina ....You will find what You seek........
it took ME 5 yrs to get where "I" am.

wolfie
puts his head on his paws,..both ears up.


_____________________________

"there is no gravity, life sucks!"


(in reply to Fivedolarbill)
Profile   Post #: 9
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