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Chuck Norris... - 2/21/2008 11:09:07 PM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch...HE decides what time it is...

Chuck Norris's tears can cure cancer...however He never cries.....

Chuck Norris marketed his urine...Its now called "Red Bull"

When Chuck Norris does push ups, he pushes the Earth down not himself up.



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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/21/2008 11:11:36 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		And yet, he came from humble beginnings.

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/323222

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/21/2008 11:49:53 PM   
DaddyAndCarina


Posts: 1789
Joined: 2/8/2008
Status: offline 		I  like him ... he created a program that is in some schools locally  that  have lower income families ... It is a karate program that  starts in middle schools that  they can attend through  high school ... the kids have a competition every year in Vegas that  he foots a majority of the bills for ...  the children earn the right but they  dont  have to  stay  home ( when others go ) because they cant afford it.

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/22/2008 12:00:38 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		Yeah...hes cool....this are just in fun....We would subtitute friends or families names and get some good laughs as well....

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Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/22/2008 12:02:29 AM   
DaddyAndCarina


Posts: 1789
Joined: 2/8/2008
Status: offline 		My son's  cockiness could make him fit in all those

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What Daddy wants ... Daddy GETS ~ Carina

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/22/2008 12:32:14 AM   
sunshinemiss


Posts: 17673
Joined: 11/26/2007
Status: offline 		Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/22/2008 5:52:16 AM   
hejira92


Posts: 2272
Joined: 10/27/2005
From: Palm Beach County, Fl
Status: offline 		1. Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.

2. Fact: Chuck Norris doesn't consider it sex if the woman survives.
 
3. Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

4. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
 
5. Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
 
6. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

7. Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.

8. Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.

9. When the boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

10. Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

stolen from chucknorrisjokes.net

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/22/2008 6:00:39 AM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		When Chuck Norris goes to the beach he doesn't get sunburned...... The sun gets Chuck Norris'd

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting (hunting implies the possiblility of faliure) he goes killing.


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Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/22/2008 6:51:53 AM   
Aubre


Posts: 478
Joined: 12/9/2004
Status: offline 		On a non-funny Chuck Norris note, would there be any doubt that Mike Huckabee would have already dropped out if he hadn't gotten support from Chuck Norris?

Also the next President should name Chuck Norris Secretary of Defense.

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/22/2008 11:23:21 PM   
knees2you


Posts: 2336
Joined: 3/15/2004
Status: offline 		~~~~~~~
 
His barbell~
 
As Always, ant

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/22/2008 11:25:45 PM   
christine1


Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline 		lol, this is great.  i've been a chuck norris fan for ages now...just something about him!

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He's the "boom" overwhelming...

He is my Master, my lover, my best friend my everything.

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/23/2008 12:54:07 AM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		Some people open up can's of Whoop Ass, Can's of Whoop Ass wish they could open a can of Chuck Norris.

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/24/2008 5:28:05 PM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		Some people are afraid of Vampies, but Vampires are Afraid of Chuck Norris.

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Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/24/2008 5:44:00 PM   
Lumus


Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline 		In the beginning, there was darkness...

...until Chuck Norris threatened to roundhouse God if He didn't invent light.



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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/25/2008 12:34:00 PM   
breatheasone


Posts: 4004
Joined: 7/14/2007
Status: offline 		Chuck Norris got an erection as he was walking down the street one day....There were no survivors 

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Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/25/2008 2:41:37 PM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		Chuck Norris is So big his Dick has a Dick and even his Dick's Dick is bigger than your dick!

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Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/25/2008 3:57:23 PM   
christine1


Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline 		Why haven't they found a cure for cancer?  Because Chuck Norris has never shed a tear.

Chuck Norris doesn't do push ups, he pushes the ground down.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad.

edited to add, i should have read the whole thread before i posted...heh.


< Message edited by christine1 -- 2/25/2008 3:59:25 PM >

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i am woman! er, godzilla! hear me roar!

http://wavcentral.com/cgi-bin/log/log.cgi?id=2856&sound=/sounds/movies/godzilla/roar.mp3


He's the "boom" overwhelming...

He is my Master, my lover, my best friend my everything.

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/25/2008 4:06:42 PM   
Lumus


Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: christine1

Why haven't they found a cure for cancer?  Because Chuck Norris has never shed a tear.

Chuck Norris doesn't do push ups, he pushes the ground down.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad.

edited to add, i should have read the whole thread before i posted...heh.



*hands you a "Get Into the Good Graces of Chuck Norris" card*

He can't roundhouse you if you hold that very tightly...his agent told me so.

*nodnodnodnodnods*



_____________________________

<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

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RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/25/2008 4:32:22 PM   
christine1


Posts: 6155
Joined: 12/15/2007
From: i'm headed to HIM...
Status: offline 		heh...i'll just give him my best innocent, puppy dog face....then he'll only be able to kiss and hug me....

_____________________________

i am woman! er, godzilla! hear me roar!

http://wavcentral.com/cgi-bin/log/log.cgi?id=2856&sound=/sounds/movies/godzilla/roar.mp3


He's the "boom" overwhelming...

He is my Master, my lover, my best friend my everything.

(in reply to Lumus)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Chuck Norris... - 2/25/2008 4:42:36 PM   
Lumus


Posts: 5968
Joined: 9/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: christine1

heh...i'll just give him my best innocent, puppy dog face....then he'll only be able to kiss and hug me....


Dog is Man's best friend; Chuck Norris has his roundhouse kick and the blood of his enemies...



_____________________________

<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

(in reply to christine1)
Profile   Post #: 20
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