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FTopinMichigan -> RE: Tips on being a better Mistress. (9/18/2005 5:41:23 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: MzMona
They are more interested in what I will do to them than trying to find out about the real person that I am? That turns me off and I will not speak to them if that is all they want to know? In all do honesty? I think about this lifestyle all the time and at some point in my life would like to find a sub who feels the same for a possible 24/7 LTR. But where?
MzMona, I'm sorry that you too are experiencing what many of us, that are seeking a relationship, have felt.
You'll find the majority of online chat contacts to be with those that usually "only" want to "talk" about it. In fact, I have found many of them to be either married, or too scared to move onto real life contact. It does help to make your profiles completely clear about your interests though, as being specific about wanting a "relationship." This, in my profile, has cut down the traffic considerably for me.
I do agree with the other posters that suggest getting out and meeting folks in real life situations. While you'll still meet those Do-me types, there are some that still seek to have a relationship and desire to know the person, and not just the player.
You will still find the married man, in real life contact, but they tend to be more honest about it, as I've seen.
Relationships, whether friendship or more, do seem to be more up front, in real life. There's no computer screen to hide behind, and you'll also have the advantage of asking others for references, or get some insight into the person before pursuing personal contact, away from the group.
As for how to be a better Mztress...unfortunately, there's no standard answer. When I started to venture out, on the road of discovery, I read books and utilized online resources. I subscribed to message boards, like this one, and watched, and later asked my own questions. I chatted online quite a bit, and moved onto real life contact with "friends." Within six months of getting a computer, I was meeting people, and it took about a year for me to feel comfortable enough to enjoy being a Top. I only wish that I took the opportunity to actually team up, or mentor with a few people, as I feel it wouldn't have taken me as long to feel comfortable with my abilities when first starting out.
K
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